The Rooftop (Poly!Hamilsquad x Reader)
Pairing: Poly!Hamilsquad x Reader
(Collab with @nonstop-smashing-expectations)
Requested?: ‘Hi! Can you write a poly hamilsquad fic that’s very angsty and sad? Maybe the reader gets into some type of accident?’
Prompt: Reader has been missing for the past hour and the boys find her about to jump.
Warnings: Depression, Suicide, Angst
Alexander was pacing the living room floor. His hands were feverishly running through his hair and he was murmuring to himself. Lafayette was scrolling through Facebook on his phone while he was lounging on the couch. John was in his studio painting while Hercules was taking a shower. It was a somewhat normal night for the four.
Except there was one person missing.
You were supposed to be home an hour ago.
You were never a forgetful person. You always showed up on time for things, sometimes early if you felt like it. But you were never a late person. Yes, you disliked your job, but it put money in your account so you couldn’t complain. You were the Chief Editor for a local newspaper, meaning that you control what was or wasn’t going to be published. There were a few people on the editing team that tries and boss you around when really it should be the other way around. You were soft-spoken and had an anxiety problem so it was an unlikely job for someone as quiet as you. But, your boss liked your creativity and put you as the Chief Editor with no second thought.
Your boyfriends were very proud of you for getting such a high rank and even took you out to dinner to celebrate when you told them you got the job. Those boys, they loved you to the ends of this universe and back. Alexander smothers you in affectionate love letters and sonnets, John loves to paint and draw pictures of you, Lafayette likes to cook for you and sing to you when you’re tired, and Hercules always insists on making your clothes anytime you grow out of them. All four of them simply adored and loved you and each other to no end. Not many people understood the poly sexuality and call it ‘cheating’ or something similar to ‘sister-wives’. Hell, your own parents disowned you for your sexuality and called you a whore. You ended up moving in with Alexander once he got his first apartment. That was a few years ago and you managed to move into a large apartment with all of your lovers living happily together.
But, somehow, you weren’t happy.
Not with yourself.
You weren’t exactly sure why you weren’t happy with yourself, your life was almost as perfect as it could be. That’s part of the reason why you didn’t tell anyone how you felt, not even your boyfriends. People didn’t understand that just because you seem to “have a better life” doesn’t mean that you don’t have your own struggles.
You were afraid that someone would tell you “other people have it worse, stop whining”. Yes, other people may have problems that are worse but the dismissal of your concerns just adds to the struggles you were going through.
So no, you didn’t tell anyone.
And that’s why you stood here, on your apartment complex’s roof.
You had contemplated suicide in the past. You even made a list of all the quickest ways to kill yourself. You could hang yourself, overdose on Alexander’s prescribed sleeping pills, take a bath and then throw in a plugged-in toaster like in the movies, or throw yourself from the apartment’s terrace or the complex’s roof. All you knew is that you needed it to be quick and while you were alone.
So that’s why you rushed up to the complex’s rooftop the moment you got home.
You had been up here for about an hour. You had gotten multiple calls and texts from your boyfriends and friends, but you ignored all of them. You had put your phone on mute so that constant ringing didn’t drive you insane. You paced the rooftop, periodically looking over the edge. It was a long drop to the cement below. You’d probably die on impact if you were lucky. You had the urge to jump off, but something kept you back. A voice. Actually, four voices. They sounded like your boys.
After sending Alexander’s twentieth phone call to voicemail, you opened Facebook. You rarely go on anymore because of work and your personal problems. You were scrolling through your wall, seeing all your friend’s celebrating birthdays and weddings made your heart ache. Just then, for some reason, an idea popped into your head. A stupid but somewhat fun idea.
You pressed the ‘Live’ tab on the status bar. Immediately, your front camera turned on and you pressed the red button. You wiped your eyes with one hand and fixed your hair. After a few seconds, you saw the viewers count start climbing. It stopped at four people. The chat came to life as well.
Angelica Schuyler: (Y/N)! What’s going on? Why aren’t you answering my texts & calls?
James Madison: (Y/N), is something the matter? You look like you’ve been crying. Did one of the boys say something to upset you? I’ll send Thomas over there if you need me to.
Peggy Schuyler: (Y/N)!! Hi!!! Are you okay? :? Do you need a hug??
George Washington: (Y/N), did Alexander upset you? Do I need to go into ‘father’ mode?
You giggled weakly. “It’s alright, you guys.” You said softly, your voice crackly and soft. “Just stupid not important stuff.”
Angelica Schuyler: Bullshit! (Y/N), what is the matter? Talk to be GDI! >:(
You ignored Angelica’s comment and switched the camera. You walked over to the edge of the rooftop and peered over, letting your phone get a full glimpse of the street under you. Some people down below had seen you and a small crowd was forming.
Peggy Schuyler: … (Y/N) pls, tell me u aren’t thinking what I think ur thinking. :(
You turned the front camera back on. You took out a slip of paper out of your pocket and opened it. You gave a weak smile to the camera before reading.
“‘My name is (Y/N) (L/N). I’m twenty-five years old and I live with my four boyfriends…’”
Lafayette was watching a video about the festival of colors in India when he got a message.
Angelica Schuyler: (Y/N)’s on Facebook Live.
Angelica Schuyler: She’s reading out her suicide note.
Angelica Schuyler: STOP HER.
Lafayette abruptly stood, ceasing John and Hercule’s conversation about anime and making Alexander stop his pacing. All three had their eyes on the Frenchman as he opened the ‘Facebook Live’ tab and turn on your live video feed.
“… and everyone always says that I have a better life than others and I shouldn’t whine and complain,” Your voice came out of the phone’s speakers. “But I have problems too! I’m not an emotionless doll that doesn’t have stress or fears or insecurities. I’m human!”
“(Y/N)…” Alexander murmured as he watched the video. You had tears streaming down your face as you spoke. You looked to be pacing back and forth.
“A lot of you guys know I have this anxiety problem and that’s just not that. I’ve had problems with depression in the past, ever since I was a teen. My parents threw me out when I came out as polysexual when I was sixteen. I lost a lot of my so-called friends because of this. I was harassed and physically attacked by my classmates. I’m surprised I didn’t kill myself then.”
Alexander already was racing to put on his shoes. Hercules did the same, handing John his sneakers. Lafayette turned off his phone and joined his boyfriends. Alexander was antsy and ready to go.
“Come on!” He cried. “We have to get up there and stop her before she does something bad!”
Alex was the first one out the door, followed closely by John and Lafayette. Hercules was last and quickly shut the apartment door before running after the others.
Alex headed toward the elevator doors, the elevator being the closest way up to the sixth-floor roof access. He was about ten feet away from it when he registered the “out of order” sign on the door.
Alex turned around and ran back the way he came, grabbing John’s arm who grabbed Lafayette who pulled Hercules alongside him so that they won’t have to stop to turn around.
Alex charged down the hallway, racing toward the door labeled “staircase level 4”. The old lady who lived toward the end of the hallway was trying to get into her apartment when she saw the boys running full tilt down the hall. She quickly flattened herself against the wall, sensing that something bad was about to happen, her groceries laying forgotten on the floor.
Alex flung open the stairway door and started running up the stairs, taking the stairs two at a time. He had just gotten to the landing for the fifth level when his phone started ringing. He didn’t want to answer it at this time, worried that it would slow him down, but something was yelling at him to answer it.
He hit the answer button, putting it on speaker so that he didn’t have to hold it to his ear and run. He almost dropped the phone in his hand when the voice of James Madison came through the speakers. “Alex, I know that we don’t really like each other but this is important. (Y/N)’s live stream just cut off suddenly and no one knows if she’s ok.” He continued talking but all that Alex and the others could hear was that one sentence.
Finding a burst of speed, they reached the sixth and final level of the building which contained the roof access. Fear and dread filled them as they could only hope that (Y/N) was ok.
They finally got to the roof access and ran up those steps. Alex pushed the door open onto the roof and darted forward into the middle of the roof, opening up space so that the others could get past him. They crowded behind him, coming to an abrupt stop as their eyes scanned the roof.
John was the first to start sobbing, having not seen his girlfriend on the roof. Alex clenched his fists, tears pouring down his face as he turned his head away from the emptiness that lay before him. Lafayette threw his arms around Hercules, pressing his face into Hercules’ chest. Hercules stared at the empty roof in disbelief, shock flooding through his body.
After a few seconds for his body to register what he was feeling due to the shock, he pressed his face into Lafayette’s hair and cried. He grabbed John and pulled him towards them, and he in return dragged Alex into the group hug as well.
A gust of wind blew their hair around, tangling it with each other. The same gust of wind took the still open access door and slammed it shut with a bang.
The group flinched at the noise, turning around to look at the access door that was built in the middle of the roof. The group all had tears in their eyes, vision blurred.
Because of that, they weren’t entirely sure for a second if what happened after that was true.
Hercules had seen it first and gasped, and the rest of the group looked to where he was pointing.
A split second later, they too saw what had surprised Hercules, as you walked around the access door wall from the other side of the roof, phone in hand.
Your face was red and tear-streaked. Your body was shaking from the cold since you were wearing only a tank top and jeans. Your phone’s screen was cracked but still working. You had a look of terror on your face. You were shaking not just from the cold, but from shock too.
“H-Hi..” You whispered. “I’m still here.”
It was Alexander who broke away from the group and slowly made his way over to you. He slowly reached out and cupped your cheek with his hand. He stood still for a few moments, stroking his thumb over your cheek.
“Guys,” He murmured. “Do you see her too or am I seeing things?”
As soon as he said that, the sky opened up and rain poured down, instantly soaking everyone to the bone.
You shuddered, wrapping your arms around yourself as the thin tank top you were wearing did nothing against the sudden chilly rain.
Lafayette saw you shivering and he walked forward past Alex to gently wrap his arms around you, the others still too shocked to move. He smiled with tears in his eyes as he said in a shaky voice, “Yeah, we see her too.” He gently brushed the rain from your face as he said, “Let’s all go back inside, it’s too cold to stay out here.”
They formed a small almost huddle like group around you as they guided you to the roof entry door, trying their best to keep the rain off you.
One by one, they filed through the door and led you down the staircase to the sixth floor. From there, they continued walking in a group formation around you, trying their best to provide body heat when their clothes were soaked as well.
Hercules jogged ahead of the group to open the apartment door, get blankets and to warm up hot chocolate for all of you.
The rest of the group shut the door behind them and went to change into drier clothes. Soon, the hot chocolate was ready and everyone was sitting on or near the couch, hot chocolate mugs in hand.
You sipped carefully from the hot chocolate, sighing in relief as you felt the chill leave your body.
Everyone had at least one or two blankets wrapped around them and you were sure you left a trail of water to your door.
A short while later, everyone was done with their hot chocolate and was no longer that cold. The soothing warmth coming from the blankets had caused everyone to drift off into a light slumber, yourself included.
Blinking drowsily, you looked at your boyfriends that lay curled up near you, with a smile. There would probably be a lot of things to talk about when you all woke up but for now, it was quiet and you felt at peace. With a yawn, you leaned back into the couch and soon fell completely asleep.
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