'uh huh'

anonymous asked:

I would watch/read the shit out of "So you think you can propose?"


The words are loud and bold, thick black strokes scrawled on the back of a Thai takeout menu that’s been taped to their fridge. More importantly, they are fighting words. 

Yuuri slips his phone out of his back pocket and dials. When his call’s been picked up, he doesn’t waste time. 

“Vitya—” he begins.

“Public enemy numero uno,” Victor answers. “What could I help you with on this fine morning?” 

Yuuri sighs. “It’s so cold out. You didn’t even take your puffy blue jacket with you. I’d washed it.” 

“I’m just getting us breakfast across the street, I’m fine,” Victor says dismissively, even as he audibly sniffles. “I’m as fine as I can be after a huge, ball-busting betrayal—”

“Your balls are fine,” Yuuri snorts. 

“We decided I could do the proposal,” Victor goes on. “You got to do the rings, so that’s already fifty percent of a proposal. I was supposed to do the other fifty percent, so you can’t just-just… Sorry, could you repeat that? Ooh, yeah extra cream cheese on the side. Perfect, thanks.”

Yuuri pours some food into Makkachin’s bowl and waits patiently as Victor wraps up picking up his order. The sound of traffic quickly fills up the background as Victor enters the street. 

“Anyway, I was saying. Solnyshko?”

Yuuri kicks at a stray dog toy on his way to the living room couch. “Uh-huh, I’m here.”

“You can’t just be a ball-hog in this basketball game of a relationship! Who are you, Kobe Bryant? There is this thing called teamwork. There is this thing called a pass.

“What is up with you and balls this morning?” Yuuri says, amused. 

“I’m not marrying a Kobe Bryant, Yuuri.” Victor sniffles again, obviously faking it this time. 

“Of course not. You’re marrying a Yuuri Katsuki.” 

Victor makes an indignant noise. “I didn’t accept your proposal,” he protests. “Who do you think you are?”

Yuuri’s mouth twitches. “Your fiance.” 

“Stop it,” Victor demands. “Stop it right now. Jeez. When did you get so. The audacity. The disrespect. No, the answer is no. The last twelve hours never happened,” Victor declares. “I’m doing the proposal and it’s gonna make you—”

“Bust my balls?” Yuuri offers.

“Fuck yeah, it’s going to bust your balls. It’s gonna bust them right through—oh, hi, Madame Sokolova.” Yuuri laughs while Victor giggles shamelessly on the other end. “No, just making plans with Yuuri. My boyfriend who is just my boyfriend and nothing more.” 

There is a sharp intake of breath while Yuuri whispers whoops

“No he did not propose last night. No, where did you hear that? Are you kidding me? Does the whole building know? Yuuri. I can’t believe you. You’ve gone too far. I’m eating your extra bagel.” 









I find it so interesting how everyone sleeps differently… I sleep on my stomach, my best friend sleeps on her side, and y'all are sleeping on the CWs Black Lightning

damn when am i gonna break free of society’s shackles and become an 18th century lady pirate captain who eventually gets caught by the navy in a caribbean port because i stopped to bed the neglected governor’s daughter who is soon to be married to a prestigious naval officer for whom she has no feelings meanwhile she is immediately drawn to me when we meet in the market so i woo her and she happily comes, so to speak, but the governor and naval officer find us because i let down my guard for once because She Does Unexpected Things To My Heart and they throw me in prison and sentence me to death for piracy but that same night ANOTHER band of pirates kidnap the governor’s daughter and hold her for ransom and do so Very Threateningly and the navy can’t catch this dastardly brute so i’m released on the grounds i rescue the woman and bring her back unharmed and i’m like uh huh sure and when i get free i debate just leaving for the first pirate port but i can’t shake the image of the woman from my mind so i convince the crew to chase down this other pirate and they’re wary but also eager for a fight so we go and rescue her before any harm befalls her and after cutting down the brutish rival pirate captain i stand there with my sword drawn looking sweaty and butchy and bloody but with concern in my eyes for her well-being  then she throws her arms around me and i take her back to my cabin and she cleans my wounds and we make sweet passionate love in the candlelight and she tells me she always knew i would come for her, again so to speak, and we decide we can never be parted again so i give my ship to a spunky up-and-coming heroic sidekick lad who proved his mettle in our recent battle and meanwhile me and my love run off and shack up on a small island with the money i put away that i stole from the british and we live to be old and happy the end

remember that time Percy and Annabeth fell asleep