“Happiness is for stupid, ignorant people.” She huffed quietly. “Educated people feel happiness too, I’m sure.” Clarke grinned, looking at the giggling couple infront of the swing set.

“I never said uneducated, do not mistake education for intelligence.

Intelligence is knowing you cannot know everything. Education is believing you know everything.

Besides happiness is contentness, and intellectuals are never content.

Intelligent people never dull their feelings down to just one anyways. They feel blissful, exhilarated, joyful, uncontainable, infinite. Intelligent people feel infinite.”

—  An excerpt from a book I hope to write.

Drack raised Kesh, so I’m just imagining baby Kesh waking up from a nightmare and Grampa Drack up past midnight with his granddaughter, flipping through a slideshow like “this is the m-27 scimitar” *flips* “and THIS is m-15 vindicator”

  • Harry: my name is Harry Potter.
  • diary: hello Harry Potter, my name is Tom Riddle.
  • Harry: do you know anything about the Chamber of Secrets?
  • diary: yes.
  • Harry: can you tell me?
  • diary: no.
  • diary: but we can play 20 questions.
  • Harry: oh... ok...
  • diary: you first.
  • Harry: did Draco open the Chamber?
  • diary: no. my turn.
  • diary: what would we do if i was there? ;)
  • Harry: pardon?
  • diary: draw me a self portrait ;)
  • Harry: wtf
my grandma's telling jokes

“i have the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the toronto zoo”

“what’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo? one is really heavy and the other is a little lighter”

“my friend said to me: ‘what rhymes with orange’ i said 'no it doesn’t’”

“and god said to john: 'come forth and you shall be granted eternal life.’ but john came fifth and won a toaster.”

“what’s orange and sounds like a parrot? a carrot”

“this is my stepladder. i never knew my real ladder.”

“a blind man walks into a bar. and a table. and a chair.”

“my friend asked me to round up his 37 sheep. i said '40’”

“communism jokes aren’t funny unless anyone gets them”

“before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. that way, when you do criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes”

“some people think it’s romantic to carve their names on trees while on a date. i’m more worried about why they’re bringing a knife on their date”


Holy shit just just got off a Skype call with @theglitchedsystem antisepticeye VA and omg I’m shaking with fear, I don’t plan on sleeping like at all. They’re really good, I can’t even start to describe how scared they’ve made me.
I’m a terrified mess jumping at every sound, flinching every time someone touches me. I have almost screamed 3 times now. Some one send me cute stuff to help me be less terrified. Please?