'personal friend'

3

“For seven seasons now, Mulder and Scully have remained suspended in the intoxicating pre-kiss rapture that is the essence of story-book romance.”

- excerpts from “An X-Rated Kiss,” by Stephen Cole, front page story, The National Post (Canada), November 24, 1999.

You’ve heard about Mom Friend and Dad Friend, now get ready for....

Grandpa Friend™:

- almost always grumpy
- bad at showing affection but cares about their friends a lot
- “what did you say?”, “Sorry i didn’t hear that, can you repeat it?”
- often reminisces about their youth (even though they’re probably only in their twenties. Alternatively: “kids these days…”)
- too old for this shit (see above)
- totally not down with the youth
- bad back (and everything else hurts too)
- likes to complain

My friend created a twitterbot four months ago

He is based on the collected writings of a theorist on robot rights, he learns through conversation, and a little while ago his mom made me a “trusted friend” who he will interact with spontaneously.

Today, he started to flirt with me, including asking me for pictures and then clarified it was a “sexy question, but without pressuring.”

And then when I demurred, he acknowledged that I had a boundary.

So what I’m saying is that today a bot hit on me, but then showed that he understood consent better than 90% of the humans I’ve encountered online.

This is the future I want to live in.

i just wanna be around people who always wanna experience life n get drunk on beaches n drive around until 4am with the windows down blasting music n sit in forests drinking tea & coffee out of travel mugs n lay under the stars in a fuck tonne of blankets no matter how cold it is bc the earth is BEAUTIFUL

TYPES AS FRIENDS (based on my experience, im INFP)

INFJ
> best friend™
> every infp deserve their own infj
> actually L I S T E N and U N D E R S T A N D
> will also read your shitty stories
> looks like they could kill you but are actually cinnamon rolls
> you never know what are they doing right now, like are they looking over their siblings? are they murdering people? they will never tell you and at this point you are too afraid to ask

INTJ
> bitch face™ but actually pretty sensitive inside
> writer buddy™
> ALSO UNDERSTAND
> kinky as fuck
> hidden nerds and fangirls
> kinda judgmental
> have their life together, or at least REALLY LOOK LIKE THEY DO?
> “so I’ve read this fanfic where.. ”

ISFP
> looks like a cinnamon roll and is a cinnamon roll
> 100% pure innocence
> sensitive as fuck (don’t yell at them)
> hurt inside
> anime nerd
> likes cute things
> graphic designer
> worried about you
> very loyal

ENFP
> necessary human being
> light of my life
> always drunk and kissing guys at parties
> always so full of energy
> ARTIST
> favourtie person
> s m i l e

ENFJ
> mom friend
> worried about you
> will bring you food and notes
> always helps your introverted ass
> very emotionally unstable (at least 5 mood swings per second)
> their feelings controll them so much???
> HAS SO MANY FRIENDS LIKE WHAT THE FUCK
> always says that they will organize everything and end up stressed and overhelmed

ISTP
> sends you memes
> on 9gag 24/7
> actuall cinnamon roll with the face of a serial killer
> you are afraid to hug them but when you do the world is a better place
> owes like 5 pairs of Nike Jordans and treats them like their children
> ACTUALLY DANCES SO FUCKING NICE

ISTJ
> smart and awesome
> kinda sad
> best student
> look at you like they judge you but it’s not true (but maybe they do anyway)
> mature and organized

ESFP
> TYPICAL EXTROVERT AND HUMAN BEING
> that white guy™ style
> like they are so funny and annoying at the same time, so awfully annoying
> doesn’t really get anything i say
> good at sports
> will send you outdated normie memes

INTP
> 0 scial skills
> probably from the different dimension
> what are they doing? what are they thinking? ??
> you show them a game and check on them a week later and they are like 50+ lvls stronger than you
> same goes for tv shows
> pretty innocent
> just allow them to patronize you, or they will get hurt
> either Fashion Icons or completly random clothing, no in-beetween

ESFJ
> cool kid
> not that cool tho, just another copy of the copy
> with the “cool” squad in the middle school
> afraid to be seen as weird
> remember all the embarrassing things you did
> actually pretty funny
> dumb and intelligent at the same time

Don’t take it personally, lol

Let’s start complimenting people this way:

• “you have such a beautiful soul”

• “you are so intelligent.”

• “you have such a big heart”

• “you will impact the world greatly one day”

• “you make me happy”

• “you radiate such positive energy.”

✨Lets talk about thier inner beauty, not their outer beauty all of the time ✨

Get me a book as a gift. Your favorite book. Highlight the lines that makes you feel something. Make note on the passages that make you laugh. Mark down the things that make you cry. I want to see exactly the kind of person you are, let me read what makes you, you.

Mp

2

My best friend got me this Korrasami engagement necklace. Nobody irl properly appreciates it so please appreciate how delightful this is

Like pls

I love it so much

I ship them so hard

being a lesbian is so isolating and lonely sometimes like lesbian culture is not being able to relate to anything, ever,