'it was stolen'

Me:*appears out of nowhere in front of Thick Ass Mary at the bar*

Mary w the thiddies: *jolts,thickly, out of surprise*


Ma I gotta let you know right off top I see your mans ain’t been treating you right FUCK that man I ain’t no lame, no goofy, no dog, no cheatin ass man. I see you got your own career and shit I like that you ambitious you bout thick as hell too and I definitely like that. I’m tryna eat that butt like some m&m’s and watch your bad ass kids and love u right so i need you to INSTANTLY put your number in my phone. now go head on and do it mrs mary thiccums

#(( but in Lordran dragons could be like dinosaurs to chicken… ))

Tbh, Chicken Covenant is just Way of the Dragon, but better. Because you are not becoming some pale imitation of a dragon. Instead, you are becoming one of the chosen, whom Henrietta will allow to live in this world.

The gods killed her ancestors and humanity has enslaved her kin. Those who are under her golden feathers are blessed and safe from the impending doom.


(Posting a selfie so all of you can be sure this is me and not the hacker).

I’m going to switch emails for afteriwake and this one but yeah. I’m back home and aside from my history of IMs with @posterofamyth having been deleted (which means you get to resend me all the fic prompts), everything is fine. I wish for a happy ending was rather prophetic.

Originally posted by chibird


Bigger Boys and Stolen Sweethearts | Chapter Seventeen

Hermione had been regretting promising Lavender and Parvati that they could help her get ready for the Yule Ball the whole day. She never knew that beauty could take quite so long, or even be a bit painful - having Lavender brush her curly hair out to wavy perfect, even with the Sleek-Eazy was an experience she never planned on repeating - even though the finished product did end up looking quite nice. She’d been in awe of the woman looking back in the mirror, very clearly her, just much more beautiful looking than she was used to.

The girls had both gushed over the periwinkle blue dress that she’d selected, and Hermione thought that it fit her new found figure rather well, and she just hoped that Viktor found her beautiful as well. Even though he was not who she expected to take her to the dance, she still wanted to impress her date. She did like Viktor, so maybe if she opened herself up to him, they might be able to find something more than friendship.