'i was lonely too.'

6

It was an idea I had, I think, when I was flying from L.A. to somewhere. I thought it would be nice to lose our identities, to submerge ourselves in the persona of a fake group. We would make up all the culture around it and collect all our heroes in one place. So I thought, A typical stupid-sounding name for a Dr. Hook’s Medicine Show and Traveling Circus kind of thing would be ‘Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band.’ Just a word game, really.”

—Paul McCartney, 1984

i’m lonely and
i don’t know how to make
it sound like poetry
anymore.


it’s just that i used to fall into friendships.
it’s just that most days i want to fall into
my bed or
my grave
and these bones are too
fragile for show and tell
and i’m like muesli with worse mental health and i don’t want anyone to
look at me except that i want everyone
to look at me and i don’t know what to say i don’t know what to
say i don’t know what to say to
anyone anyway and last year
my best friend
moved 413.4 miles away.
—  L.H
3

“There will always be a door to the light!

2

“And if you maybe-sorta-kinda like me back then maybe we could sort of go on a date-ish?”

I’m a little different now, because of you.

Maybe it’s not noticeable to other people, but I see it.

I see it when I turn off my favorite song, because it reminds me too much of you.

I see it in pictures, in the insincerity of my smile.

I see it when I meet someone new and can only think of the ways they will hurt me.

I see it when I look in the mirror and wonder why I just wasn’t good enough.

I should’ve listened to my mom when she told me you were toxic.

I should’ve listened to my friends when they said you were no good.

You gave me a pair of rose-colored glasses and showed me how it felt to be loved.

You shielded me from your harsh intentions and led me to believe in you, in us.

But when the glasses came off, you were gone, and the only thing left of me was regret.

So much regret.

Because you are a liar

And finally after all this time.

I see it.

—  I see it /SM

i want every creator that doesn’t have a circle of friends to help spread their work to know i’m rooting for you. 

i know you’re too shy reach out, you’re too busy to make the connections, you just want to share your hard work, you want your work to stand on its own without politics and favoritism to sway opinions. 

i also know you feel really alone most days. 

try to remember your work is valid. it is good. it is worthy. 

please don’t stop. 

they might have “popularity” but you have something far more important: talent, skill, passion, and beauty. the truly gifted creators were never recognized during their time. the popular ones are all but forgotten now. 

please don’t stop creating. you are amazing.