Before You Got Married, Did You Secretly Know It Wasn't Right?
While at a recent fun dinner, some acquaintances and I were surprised to discover that three out of seven of us had been divorced. Some of us were remarried, some were freshly uncoupled, some were ...

I wrote this five years ago but re-read it today after someone asked me a question about how normal it is to question an engagement. 

Anon: Can someone write a fic about an oc who only dates Tom because of his money but slowly starts to fall in love with him

TITLE: Why do I love you
Word count: 1136
NOTES/WARNINGS: I wrote this between my communication and culture coursework so it’s a little short and maybe a bit rushed aha. Sorry anon x

You sighed to yourself as you waited for Tom to come pick you up from your hotel. You had done it many times before. You meet a rich man, he takes you on dates, buys you expensive things and you continue to use them until you get bored. That’s how it had always been with you. You managed to get rich from it due to the amount of expensive things you had been given over the years.

You were pulled out of your little daydream when a Jaguar pulled out in front of you. You had to fight the urge to roll your eyes and instead put a smile on your face. Reaching for the door handle, you were stopped by Tom quickly getting out and running to your side.

“I’ve got it.” He said with his usual toothy smile. He opened your door and waited for you to be sitting comfortably before closing the door and walking back around to his side. Once in, he began to drive his overly expensive car once again. You had done this a thousand times with a thousand different men so you knew what was going happen – he would pick you up in his nicest car, take you to the nicest restaurant, feed you the nicest food and wine and then attempt to take you back to his. At which point you would reply maybe on the third date, meaning he would take you on more dates, fall in love with you and buy you more things. After you slept with one man he even bought you a house.

“I was thinking we could go out for dinner tonight.” Tom said happily. He didn’t look at you since he was concentrating on driving through the busy London nightlife. There we go. Dinner. “But I thought that might be slightly cliché. After all, I’m sure a beautiful lady as yourself has seen her fair share of dinners.” You looked at Tom with shock. This was going to be the first time a man had broken the pattern and you weren’t too sure if you liked it. However, you couldn’t let your façade slip so you giggled as if you were nervous being on your first date together.

“Oh really? Where are we going then?” You said, looking between Tom and the road. He just winked at you and continued to drive. You continued to engage Tom in conversation but in your mind, you were gagging to know exactly where you were going.

“Here we are.” He said as he pulled outside a building with pillars situated out the front. Getting out, you noticed it was the Lyceum theatre. Famous for the play ‘The Lion King’. Tom gave the keys to a man who drove it away to park and offered you his arm, which you happily took.

“You didn’t let me open your car door for you.” Tom scolded playfully. For the first time that night, a genuine smile grew on your lips.

“Well, perhaps I’ll let you open the door later.” You said, earning a chuckle from Tom. Walking up the stairs the theatres entrance, you actually felt excited which was strange. You had always been bored on dates.

“This way to your seat, sir.” The man said when Tom handed the tickets. You were expecting seats that were not cheap, but not too expensive either. But no. He had booked a booth for just the two of you.

“Well, this is fancy.” You said, sitting next to him.

“I wanted to see this play with someone interesting.” He said, pouring you and him a glass of wine each. Well, at least he kept to the tradition with the alcohol. “And you were number one on my list.” You picked up your glass and the two of you clinked them together. You continued polite conversation for a while until the lights turned down and the play began.

Throughout the play, you found yourself continuing to look over at Tom. Something was weird with him… different. You even started to find yourself having feeling for him. You shook your head at the thought. You promised yourself after your divorce you weren’t going through that again and you meant it.

“Thank you for a lovely evening, Y/N.” Tom said as he parked outside your hotel.

“I should be the one thanking you!” You said, hitting his shoulder lightly. He looked at you happily and you sat in comfortable silence in a few seconds.

“Can I take you out again?” He asked in an almost shy whisper. Your heart skipped a beat when he said this – something that hadn’t happened before. You nodded enthusiastically before reaching for the car handle. “Don’t even think about it, darling.” Tom ordered, running out of the car and opening your door for you. You were thankful for the make-up on your cheeks so your blushing wasn’t on show.

You were waiting for it. Waiting for the sleezy comment, waiting for him to ask to come in to your room for some ‘coffee’, waiting for him to make any suggestive comment. But it never came. That weirded you out but in a good way.

“How about Friday?” He asked. “Say six?” You agreed to meet him again in a weeks’ time and he smiled down at you. Taking your hand, he began to walk towards the hotel.

“Oh, no Tom.” You said, assuming he was inviting himself into your hotel room. He shot you a confused look before he was hit with realisation at what you thought he was doing.

“No, no I wasn’t planning on doing that tonight! I just like to walk a lady to her door.” You sighed, relieved. However, at the same time there was a small feeling of disappointment. “I’m not like every other man you’ve ever been out with.” He chuckled. A noise that kept making your heart flutter. He walked you to your hotel room and you were almost sad that tonight was over. You would never admit it out loud but you enjoyed tonight extremely.

“I look forward to Friday then.” Tom said happily when you reached your hotel room. “Goodnight Y/N.” He kissed the knuckles on your hand you were holding and turned and left, leaving you feel almost sad he was leaving. Maybe settling down again after all these years won’t be as bad as you thought.

My older sister just posted this on facebook:

In class this morning:
“So, [older sister], you’re married?”
“Yeah, little over a year now.”
“Is it pretty serious?”
I’m really worried about the generation that follows mine…

“Stay together for the kids”? If you’re so concerned about how it will effect your kids how about you ask them? Cause I can assure you if I had a choice between “breaking up the home” with a divorce, or having 12 years of yelling at 3 am on school nights, watching my siblings crying because they don’t get why their parents are so angry, and watching my parents be miserable together, I would have went for the divorce.

It’s not just because it’s my birthday. But this emptiness and abandonment hurts more and more. I had hoped to spend the evening watching a movie and relaxing together. Instead, he’s ER hopping, trying to get a shot and a script.

I think I am starting to realize the inevitable. I’ve known it for some time now, years really. We are doomed. Even if he has it within him to get healthy, I don’t have it within me to open up again, to love again, to be soft again. I have clung to this for far longer than I should have, longer than most others would have. I clung in desperation, and I clung in spite. I held on because I couldn’t think of anything else better. I hung on because that’s what a friend and wife does.

Now, I spend my days wishfully dreaming of some catastrophe that will send me into the nothingness of oblivion. I don’t actively search, but if I were to die today, I would be relieved. I’m slowly starting to recognize these feelings within myself. “Till death do us part,” and I spend my days waiting for death with baited breath. His or mine, I don’t think it matters much any more.

I stay alive for two reasons. One, I care very much for my cats. If I die, there will be no one to care for them. No one in my family will take them in, which means the three of them will go to the pound. If they aren’t killed there, they will be adopted out to separate homes. I can’t have that happen to my cats. They’re annoying little shits, but they’re MY annoying little shits. And I love them to pieces. Two, if I kill myself, then Husband is stuck here. No car, no money, no job, no friends, no family down here. His family is poor and without resources to get him back to Ohio. Granted, Husband would probably off himself shortly after, so that may be a non-issue. Still … the cats.

The cats are enough to keep me going. I exist, but I don’t live. There is no joy, little happiness. Husband and I don’t talk, at least not about anything of any substance. We have sex maybe once per month. It’s quick and unfulfilling on many levels.

He has been an opiate addict for at least 5 years. He hasn’t worked in over 1.5 years. He has wrecked me financially and emotionally. Why can’t I just pull the trigger and file for divorce? Why is it so hard? Why can’t I just take that step, admit that I was fooled, and release myself from this prison?

People are allowed to leave you.

People are allowed to break up with you.

People are allowed to love you but not want to be with you.

People are allowed to not want to talk to you.

People are allowed to put their happiness before yours and do what makes them happy even if it does not include you.

People are allowed to move on from you.

People are allowed to fall in love with someone else.

People are allowed to not want you in their life.

People are allowed to do whatever they want to better themselves and become the version of themselves they are trying so hard to love.

Don’t be bitter toward someone who is only trying to be happy.

She Divorced Me Because I Left Dishes By The Sink
It seems so unreasonable when you put it that way: My wife left me because sometimes I leave dishes by the sink. It makes her seem ridiculous; and makes me seem like a victim of unfair expectation...

He doesn’t really mention how much OTHER work the wife is already doing in the home and relationship  (and he doesn’t acknowledge that this dynamic plays out in lots of non-straight/non-het couples), but he does get many of the central points exactly right.  I’m sure there will be MRA trolls abusing him in the comments for it and questioning his masculinity, etc. as they do.

Been wanting to do this for forever…one of the early RPs I encountered when I first came here was of the Doctor taking Clara shoe shopping in 1950s Italy (naturally he was bored to death while she went shoe crazy)…

Okay, let’s tear this apart:



3.) Homo/biphobic attention whore is simplyfing attraction solely to sexual activity.


5.) Troy’s been signed away again, but he’s getting visitation.

6.) “I Betrayed My Wife” may be deleted soon, if not already.

7.) He openly admits he’s not good when left alone/single and “runs to the wrong people” when he gets desperate.

8.) Fucker thinks spouses are required to fulfill sexual needs despite not wanting to consent.

I’m sorry this is out of order, but I’m excited!

Oh, but…the nanners in the comments hate her now. Typical.