'HEY EREN CAN I TALK TO YOU'

Of Summer Saturdays and Sundaes

cissyswonderland directed me to blauerozen ’s ereri Ice Cream Truck Driver AU and uh, things happened.

EDIT: I put this fic up on Ao3!

“Hmm, I think I’ll take two drumsticks, a strawberry shortcake, a Flintstones push-up pop—you know make that three—a fudgsicle, and—”

“Hey mister! You’re holding up the line!”

“You know what Susan? I was here first so you’re just gonna have to sit your buttcheeks down and wait while the big kids talk okay?” Eren snapped at the tomboy behind him. “Man, sorry about that. Say, Levi, are you going to Sasha Braus’s birthday party? I mean, it’s gonna be at the lake so you know it’s gonna be sweet! But then, you know, I guess you are used to sweet things.”

Eren leaned against the counter, resting his chin on his forearms, knees bent inward, rotating his ankle in little circles as he blinked upward at the unimpressed ice cream truck driver.

“C'mon Eren!” another kid whined. “We have to get back to our game!”

“Billy, can you not see I’m busy here?”

“I’m gonna tell Jean you’re the one who dented his Porsche!” Billy threatened.

“And I will rat you out to Mr. Hannes about who really broke his window!” Eren shot back.

“$12.50,” said Levi punching the numbers in.

"Oh, right, uhhh,” Eren dug around in his pocket. “Heh, seems I’m a nickel short.”

He looked up at Levi with a sheepish grin.

“I could take off the Flintstones—” Levi started.

“I only have $1.45.”

Levi snorted in annoyance.

“Do you think you could just pretend I have enough for a Flintstones push-up? I mean it’s only 5 cents.”

“Yeah and if I’d only been a centimeter taller I could’ve been an astronaut,” Levi’s ironic drawl seemed out of place with the white paper hat on his head his uncle forced him to wear.

He turned from Eren. “Next!”

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  • Jean's Last Moments
Play

Heyo! This request comes from an anon. “Anonymous said: Hello! Can you do a recording of Jean and like all of his friends died so he is alone looking into a fire kinda going crazy and talking to marco, idk my ideas are scattered everywhere but ya I think this would be cool anyway THANKYOU”

Script:

Hey…Marco…Mikasa and Eren died today. They gave it one last attempt at fighting the colossal titan and…even combined, with Eren in titan form, that wasn’t enough. After Armin last week…that makes me the last survivor of the 104th squad. I don’t even know If I’ll make it through the night but…I just wanted to talk to you. I miss them…but I miss you so much more. By the look and sound of things though, I’ll be joining you soon. So, have a bowl of soup or something waiting for me when I join you, okay? It really shouldn’t be long now…I can hear them…I knew I was going to die anyway but…starting this fire…it reminds me of you. I don’t know why, maybe it’s how warm and inviting or whatever other bullshit it may be but…I’m glad I was able to share my final moments with you.

ARE YOU FUCKIGN G KIDDING ME JEAN IS THE BIGGEST NERD IN HISTORY LIKE HE SEES A GIRL WHO HE IS INFATUATED WITH ON SIGHT AND HES LIKE  u u uh i , i like ur hair,

HE TRIES TO IMPRESS MIKASA BY SAYING HES STINGY WITH GAS USAGE ON HIS 3DMG can you imagine him at a club like “hey baby wanna know my annual salary” or “wanna know how much i saved on groceries this month” and every person he talks to just walks away from him without looking back even once

jean was arrogant in the beginning of the series bc he was kind of doing that stupid thing where he wanted to impress The Girl and also bc of eren (the two cases are connected of course) but hes not usually like that 

also another instance in which jean is a dork: he tries so hard to keep the potato joke alive and even sasha doesnt even give two shits about it jeans a pathetic meme loving fuck hes a DORK FROM THE VERY CORE AND I WILL NOT ACCEPT ANY OTHER INTERPRETATIONS

Jean looked up and saw Armin and said to him,

“Hey Armin, I guess you can say just thinking about life… You know? It’s just so crazy that we live in this freaking hell.” He said with a weak smile on his face. He did want to make a fuss about it or anything, just someone to talk about it to. “It’s almost like yesterday when we were training and and Marco was alive and Eren along with Annie were normal humans and nothing else. Weird right?”

Do You Wanna Slay Some Titans? (Do You Wanna Build A Snowman Parody)

(From Mikasa’s POV)

Eren?

Do you wanna kill some Titans?
C'mon let’s kill them all.
You don’t see Armin anymore,
And Jean’s a bore,
Your mind has gone astray.

We looked out for each other,
But now you’re gone,
Please just tell me why!

Do you wanna slay some Titans?
You can do it as a Titan. (NOT NOW, MIKASA)
Okay, bye…

(From Armin’s POV)

Eren?

Do you wanna kill some Titans?
Or steal some food from Sasha’s haul?
I think some company is overdue,
I’ve started talking to the Titans in the wall! (please don’t eat me!)

It gets a little lonely,
Out there on my own,
Watching the scouts all die.

(Instrumental bit, insert sad bits from Eren’s youth)

(Jean’s POV)

Eren?

Hey jerk, I know you’re in there.
Your boyfriend’s asking where you’ve been.
Marco’s gone and trying to
Make some peace with you,
Just let me in.

At least you have your buddies,
I’ve no one now.
What am I gonna do?

Do you wanna slay some Titans?

  • Armin Teaches Eren About The Birds And The Bees
Play

This request comes from @sweetcreamdreams“Can you do armin trying to explain the birds and the bees to Eren?”



Armin…I’m going to ask you something…and you can’t laugh okay?

Of course, Eren. What is it?

Promise not to laugh?

I promise.

What…where do we come from?

What do you mean?

You…Me…everyone. How do we…exist?

*HAHAHA*

You said you wouldn’t laugh!

I’m sorry, Eren…but I didn’t expect to have to ever talk about this with anyone, least of all you.

Hey, are you calling me stup-

No, Eren, nothing like that. I’m just…surprised no one ever explained it to you. Okay, when two people like each other, they develop a feeling, right here in their stomach. It’s hard to explain…but it’s like a knot that won’t go away but it feels…good. And when that happens, they say they like each other and then they start dating. As time passes, they learn to love each other. When that happens…they express that love…with sex.

Okay. Got it so far. What’s sex.

*Laughs* Sex is…when two people who really like each other get physical. They use this, and they…well…a guy puts his…you know a girl doesn’t have one of the things…in your pants right?

What…that can’t be true…

Just like you don’t have boobs, Eren.

But…what do they have?

Uh…it’s more complicated than that…but basically…a hole? And when a boy and a girl love each other…they uh…fill that hole?

Oh…I see…that’s weird.

Why?

Because I…that feeling you were talking about…I don’t really get it when I see any girls.

Well, you-you just haven’t found the right one yet.

No, Armin…I…get that feeling when I see you…

anonymous asked:

Hi there, I really love this Tumblr. I was wondering if you were going to do analyses of Levi x Mikasa for chapters 71-74? Thanks. Cheers, C.

Hey, thanks a lot for the compliment! Unfortunately there wasn’t much interaction between them these last few chapters, but we’ve seen some developments, especially during chapter 72.

Can we talk about Mikasa not minding if Levi gives Eren a beating or two?! 

(Yes, this time he started it, but…) 

It could mean the following: 1. Mikasa’s more mature and less protective over Eren and 2. Mikasa didn’t feel like confronting Levi about beating Eren up again because he’s right and 3. Mikasa trusts Levi to discipline Eren and the others.

There are a few more things to note in this chapter, but I’ll probably wait for more chapters to come out so we have more rivamika material to comment on.

If Eren and Levi Had Phones

Eren: *calls Levi* Hey babe!
Levi: You do realize we are in the same room right?
Eren: Doesn’t matter, why you ain’t pick to the phone before?
Levi: Because we are sitting five consecutive inches from each other. I can see your ugly ass. *hangs up*
Eren: Awe, but baby-
Levi: But baby my ass I’m not gonna sit here and play telephone when I can talk to you like I’m doing now.
Eren:……………..
Levi: Then again, I don’t pay the bills so call me all want.

  • Armin Wakes Up After Being A Titan
  • Eremin
Play

So, I toyed with whether or not I should upload this one at all. I’m not too sure about it, but here you guys go. The request comes from @sanikori.

Hey Shawn, can you do an Eremin audio where Eren cries his eyes out in happiness while huging Armin real tight after taking him out of his titan form? just like that time when Mikasa found Eren alive. Pretty please? it’s been an eternity since your last Eremin audio.


Script:

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  • Armin's First Time
Play

This request comes from @brookiebrockbrick.


Script:

There’s no fuckin’ way.

I’m dead serious, not once.

How is that possible? Everyone does it.

Not Armin. Not unless he does it in the privacy of his own room, and very quietly.

He had to have tried it. Everyone does at some point in their lives.

I promise you, he hasn’t. We’ve talked about it a few times. He just doesn’t feel the need to.

I can’t imagine my life without it…

Yeah, me either. Shit- he’s coming. I bet I can get him to do it right now. U-uh hey, Armin, what’s up?

Nothing much, just got back from the store. Why do you have that look on your face? What did you do, Eren?

Uh…Armin…I’m really sorry but…when I did laundry this morning…I forgot to separate my clothes…

Wh- How can you…it…EREN, IT’S SO SIMPLE. LIGHTS, AND DARKS, *menacing* lights…and darks…you f-f-fucking idiot.

Holy shit