''i'd take zayn for the day'' ''and harry in the night'' ok

  • Louis: I'd take zayn for the day, because I wouldn't be able to handle him in the night
  • Me: ok nice mhm fair ok
  • Louis: And I'd take Harry for the night...
  • Louis: ...hHHowever I'd Sss-St-still s-stSTRUGGLE WITH hhANdLING HIm At n-NIgHT FFFUCK
  • Me @ my brain: ....so jot that down

anonymous asked:

Hi, first, I'd be very interested in what you have to say about Louis' lad crew. Also, how did you come across Larry t)& what convinced you that it was real? :)

I can’t answer both questions at once, because I’m super long-winded (but at one point I’ll try and write something about Louis’ friends).

At the beginning of this year all I knew about One Direction was that Zayn was the best one, because he had tweeted #FreePalestine and Harry was the worst, because he had tweeted “RIP Baroness Thatcher”.  I think I might have read the Guardian profile of them from the end of last year, but nothing in it had stuck.

I’d become a little obsessed with podcasts after Serial came out (if you haven’t listened to it it’s amazing – if you have make sure you also listen to Undisclosed).  A friend of mine was listening to a podcast called ‘Reply All’.  He told me that Episode #6 ‘Larry Shippers’ was really good and about One Direction fans. I didn’t love reply all – it seemed to explore the internet from the perspective of male hipsters who lived in Brooklyn – a perspective I tire of easily.  But I kept listening and did find ‘Larry Shippers’ very interesting.

Interesting, but weird – what would make all these people believe that two members of a boyband were in a relationship? So I googled “Larry Stylinson”.

It wasn’t long before I found Top 30 Iconic Larry Stylinson Moments (and the next 30 and the next). By about half-way through the first video I was like “Oh that’s why people think they’re together.”  And then I kept watching videos and reading masterposts.

At first I told myself that I was looking at all this because I was really interested in the fandom response. I resembled nothing so much as Louis Tomlinson in those early denials.  “Some people genuninely think they’re in a relationship – isn’t that interesting” I thought to myself as I watched all the Freddieismyqueen videos. “They genuinely think that” as I read the Treatise. “People genuinely think that” as I made my way through bulletproofhalo’s tags (and then I bit Harry’s back).

I’m still fascinated by the fandom.  I’ve just let myself admit that this is the greatest love story of all time and there’s nothing wrong with being obsessed with it.


Some part of me believed that Harry & Louis were together before I was 100% sure of Louis’ name (later I’d say to a friend – it’s when you can reliably tell Liam and Niall apart that you’ll know you’re in it too deep). I mean the moment where Harry pats Louis’ knee in the Irish interview? That’s something else.

As I tried to make sense of what was going on, the thing that was most likely to make me wonder if maybe there was another explanation was other people’s certainty.  I’d read posts saying ‘best friends don’t…’ and more often than not I’d disagree.  My best friend has been the most important part of my life for a super long time. I’ve seen all sorts of friendships and all sorts of relationships.

What I came to realise is that it’s not any one thing that ‘best friends don’t, but the combination. I’ve known friends who make sexual inneuendo and mock-make out, I’ve known friends who touch each other intimately, I’ve known friends who are the centre of each other’s worlds and talk about that, I’ve known friends who stare at each other lovingly, but the only people I’ve known who do all those things were either together, or in one of those weird, long, pre-togethers that sometimes happen and no-one else understands.

Like lots of people, for a while I wasn’t sure what was going on now.  It was clear they were into each other when they were younger, but there was nothing recent.

That changed when I understood the timeline, when I saw all these things that happened not as isolated moments, but how they fitted together. The big one was understanding the way everything was shut down in 2012 and that that that did not and could not have reflected a change in their relationship. But almost as important for me was more recent events. In January this year, ‘Not that important’, the dagger and Bullshit 2.0 were only a few months ago. Understanding that Harry had spent an entire publicity day with the goal of communicating that he is attracted to men, and then louis_tomlinson had tweeted about how he was in fact straight, but then Louis had got the dagger that fandom had been talking about for so long was huge.  Once I understood that I was reasonably certain that they were still together now and also that they wanted to come out, so it was OK to talk about it.

It didn’t take long though. Less than a month after I listened to the podcast, I stayed up late on the night of Harry’s birthday hoping for confirmation that Louis would be there.  I still remember where I was when Lairport happened.

When I googled ‘Larry Stylinson’ I lost a couple of months of my life and I spend multiple hours a day following One Direction now.  I have no regrets.