anonymous asked:

How exactly does your relationship work, being matesprit/kismesis? Do either of you ever get confused on if you love/hate the other on specific days...? I'm honestly curiously confused as to how you could ever hate each other, being so perfect for each other and all.

We’re as far fr9m perfect as it gets, heated m9ments like this are n9t entirely rare, but we always take care of each 9ther afterwards♥/♠

IT HAPPENS MORE OFTEN THEN I LIKE, ONCE A WEEK AT MOST, I DON’T LIKE HURTING MY BABE, BUT DAMN CAN HE BITE! ;o)♥/♠

thinking a lot about my friend drawing up a LEASE on me to move in for like a month or two to help me out. 

I’d be paying her 300 a month and staying out the way.

What the hell does she need a lease for?

Like…ouch.

Am I so bad that she needs it legally binding?

I’m actually crying thinking about it. It’s just going to be a list of things saying I’m a slob and she won’t tolerate it. She’s seen my last apartment. Already told me to throw out my bed. 

So what? A lease would give her the right to “evict” me if I forget to wash the dishes?

I mean…

How am I supposed to feel about that.

Is that how I should be treated? I can’t tell. I don’t know. I’ve always been treated like crap by people IRL. It’s hard to decipher what’s reasonable and what’s not.

I mean all you have to do is say “You can stay here but you have to be neater and throw away your old bed and pay 300 a month.”

And I’d get it. Does it have to be in legal contract that you think I’m a slob?

So the plan now is to move in at my grandma’s house while I look into housing and job options back in my little town. I mean right now it’s all just about finding stability and housing. Where I am now and the money I get from SSI just isn’t cutting it. I’m miserable. Financially I’m sinking and could declare bankruptcy if I really wanted to. And where I am I’m so lonely and depressed. There’s nobody I know here and there’s absolutely nothing to do. Everything is a half-hour drive away. 

If I were somewhere with an apartment that had phone reception (godfucking damnit!) or had a damn job, I’d not feel so much like shit. 

But as it is right now each day is a chore. 

But, hey. I wrote today. I made some important calls. I’m going to format my thesis. Going to listen to the audio book of the book for Comps. So I can start working on that 15-paper essay. 

Oh my god. It’s so much. So much to deal with. 

Why did I move out here?

‘Cause I hate myself.