{so went out an bought it}

Retail Siblings bond at checkout

Had a nice outting with a guy pal today. Went and saw Ragnarok, and then poked around the mall afterwards until closing. Bought a Hufflepuff and Slytherin beanie from “Warm Conversation”, and the cashiers found a half-eaten lollipop on a sweatshirt. Cashier checking my items out was disgusted, and rightfully so, and told her buddy to get a wet wash cloth to clean the sweatshirt.

My pal’s a former janitor at his last job, and I still work where he worked last. Starts on about people’s behavior. Pal sympathizes with her because he's​ cleaned a lot of stuff like that. I tell her I work retail as well, and even though I wasn’t working today, I know what it’s like to be on the receiving end.

I think she liked that two of her last customers of the night were very much on the same page as her. We feel you sister. We feel you. Eff disgusting customers.

2

I mean, it’s an iconic character, so obviously, I’ve had some kind of exposure to it. But I didn’t know that much about it before I got the job. One of the real joys of doing this has been to just gobble up as many comics as I possibly can. I pretty much drive to every job that I do. So every city that I went through, I found the first comic book store and pretty much bought them out of their Punisher line. I’ve really gotten into the character through the comics.

Just got Jemma back from her grooming appointment. It went well but I feel so bad. I’ve been using the wrong brush to groom Jemma and she had mats in her undercoat that I didn’t know were there. They all got brushed out but Jemma almost bit the groomer because it hurt. 😢 So I bought three new brushes and we aren’t going to let this happen again.

Overall though Jemma did perfectly and I was able to pick her up promptly so my fears are slowly dissolving.

anonymous asked:

Hey love, so I just landed a POT from my job. Went out and he bought me $1,000 worth of stuff, some of which I’ll keep. BUT question, which website is best to sell the stuff I don’t want. AND I’m new to this, so may be coming back for more advice or just scroll thru your blog

Probably depop because they only take a tiny bit of what you make. I can’t remember the exact number, but it’s much less than poshmark. In the future it’ll be better for you to get cash than stuff you don’t like and will have to sell. Feel free to come back with any other questions you may have!! 💘💕

5

Hanging out at Fiona’s place

So Fiona actually transferred to Hyperion before 4.1, and I found her lounging around the Limsa Aetheryte with all the hobos… Which is why I gave her some keys to my house, so she’d have a chill place to hang out away from the riffraff. At any rate, clearly didn’t need to worry much cuz as soon as 4.1 dropped she also bought up some real estate. Went by to check out her place to snipe ideas for my own.

My Secret Session Story.

On October 6th (the day after I got my wisdom teeth out) Taylor Nation Dmed me about a top secret event I was invited to. As soon as I read that I knew I had to go no matter what, I fell on the floor, and I was sobbing. On October 8th I got a call from Taylor Nation, and they told me it would be on October 18th in Rhode Island. Even though that is so far away from Ontario, Canada my parents were still so supportive and said we would go. Btw an hour after the call Taylor came on my livestream and just wow.

I then went out and bought a really cute outfit, and kept it a secret from everyone, and couldn’t sleep for the whole week.

Once the London Secret Session happened, I knew that’s what I would be attending too. And I once again started crying. Every time I thought about what would happen on October 18th I cried.

Finally on October 17th we began our 10 hour drive down, and I just listened to Taylor the whole time (I should’ve done homework, but like…) and it was so fun!

Then the day came…

I woke up early, walked on the beach and explored Rhode Island. Then I got ready for the night!

At around 2:40pm we drove to the meeting place, and got all checked in and got our wristbands and everything. I also met up with my online friend Akhila who was also invited!!!

Then we all got in these cars and drove up to TAYLOR SWIFTS HOUSE. The gates opened all dramatically and I began sobbing!!

HER HOUSE IS BEAUTIFUL!!!!!

We then went into Taylor’s kitchen and ate food, I went out on her balcony and talked to Scott (he gave me so many guitar picks), I met Andrea, Austin, and Tree as well! They were all so kind.

The food was amazing, I ate so many of the rep m&m’s.

We then gathered into Taylor’s living room, they closed the blinds, dimmed the lights and the session began. (((WHAT HAPPENS IN THE SECRET SESSIONS STAYS IN THE SECRET SESSIONS)))

Lemme just say that the album was absolutely amazing, the best one yet. Taylor was in her chair dancing and singing along the whole time and looked around at all of us. She made eye contact with me so many times, and smiled at me, and danced with me, and I cried so much. I was so freaking close to her and she looked so beautiful and she was soooooooo happy.

She looked flawless, and her happiness radiated to all of us.

(((more stuff happened here that I can’t talk about))))

Then we went into another room and waited to meet Taylor.

During this sessions she wasn’t rushed, she took her time with everyone, and it was supposed o end at 9:15 but I was there till 11:30.

I went into the room to meet Taylor, and she hugged me so tight. She knew my name (she said it wrong but she knew how to spell it so it was all good, and then she said it 5 more times the right way lol). She was even more gorgeous that close up, I couldn’t believe what was happening, yet she was so easy to talk to?

We talked about how amazing the new album is, I said that Red was my absolute favourite but Rep took the #1 place and she was like “LOW FIVE, HUGH FIVE!!!”

Then we talked my livestream she watched, and how I couldn’t find my cat. And she said she’s seen me online so much but I used to be more tanned ahahah.

She kept complimenting my outfit, and stroked my choker saying “I love it it’s so delicate” and how my shoes matched my skirt and my choker matched my nails, so she proceeded to touch my nails.

She said she loved how energetic I was and that I was dancing with a childlike joyfulness the whole time!

At one point I was like “you’re gorgeous” and then she tapped my arm and said “YOU’RE GORGEOUS” and later she said “you’re an angel” so I tapped her arm and said “YOU’RE AN ANGEL” it was so cute.

Then she asked what type of pose I wanted to do and I said “I was thinking like two best friends just chilling on the couch” and she was like “OHMYGOSH YESSS DO YOU WANNA HOLD A GRAMMY????”

So we started talking about the Grammy I was holding which was aoty for 1989 !!!!!

Taylor was like “yes that’s the new baby.”

On the way over to the couch I stumbled and the couch moved and she was like “oh don’t worry I do that all the time.”

Then we sat on the couch, she threw her legs across me with her amazing black boots, and she cuddled me as I held the Grammy!!

Then she was like “Halley’s mom!! Do you wanna hold the Grammy?”

So we took another photo standing up with my mom, and I hugged her as my mom held the Grammy.

Then I thanked her for everything and told her I love her.

And she was like “I love you, you little fashionista” and did a little dance.

Then I walked out of that beautiful house, got a bag of merch, and went back to my hotel room.

Then Taylor came on my tumblr and liked soooo many posts and reblogged one and just the day couldn’t get any better.

The amount of joy I felt for the whole night was absolutely amazing. Nothing can ever compare. It’s safe to say that it was the best day/night of my life and I will cherish it forever.

I can’t believe Taylor wanted to meet me, invited me into her home to listen to her new album, and knew about me!?!?!

October 18th 2017 will forever hold a special place in my heart.

Familiar but Unexpected

One Shot: Jungkook Best friend!AU x Reader

Word count: 9.5k 

Genre: Fluff, Angst and NSFW! Smut. 

A/N: I recommend you read this in one sitting - strap yourself in for one heck of a rollercoaster ride, boys and girls. I’m back to ruin your life temporarily. @jeonjungrude @author–nim @btsbangtansarmyv

Summary: Jungkook, your ‘best friend’ needs a place to stay since his older brother unexpectedly came home. You try to fix their sibling relationship but that ends up costing you your friendship with Jungkook- a trade for something better or for something worse? 

@btsfanficss masterlist here 💕

Originally posted by armythreej

The doorbell rung simultaneous to the sound of constant knocks on your door. You opened your bloodshot eyes and reached over for your phone that sat on the bedside table. Who in their right mind would visit you at 4 in the morning? The violent knocking intensified and you groaned with frustration, peeling yourself away from the warm bed. You shuffled yourself over to the front door and swung it open while rubbing your tired eyes. Of course, only Jeon Jungkook, your best friend, would have the nerve to barge in at such an ungodly hour.

Jesus woman, I thought you were dead,” Jungkook’s voice sounded relieved at the sight of you in front of him, in your nighties that consisted of merely a singlet and terribly short running shorts. It exposed your supple skin to the handsome boy.

“Jungkook what the fuck do you want? I’m tired, it’s 4 in the bloody morning-” you sighed and wobbled with fatigue.

“Hello to you too, sweetheart,” Jungkook scoffed and entered your apartment with a small suitcase in his grip. “My brother came home unexpectedly just then, I need a place to crash until he leaves.”

You nodded without much thought, you knew his brother was always a sensitive topic for him so you understood.

“That’s fine by me. I’m going back to sleep,” you announced to the noir haired boy with a loud yawn. He merely snickered at your exhausted state and jumped onto your sofa- where he usually crashed after his nights out.

You glided back into the comfort of your bedsheets and closed your eyes to drift off into dreamland.


Morning came quicker than expected. You woke up to the sound of shuffling and fidgeting from the kitchen. It was unusual for Jungkook to wake up so early, early being 9 o’ clock since it was a Saturday morning. 

“Good morning,” you said in a nasal voice as you poured yourself a cup of coffee Jungkook had brewed. You peaked over Jungkook’s broad shoulders to see sizzling pancakes on the pan. 

“What’s the special occasion?” you murmured behind a hazy sounding giggle and Jungkook showed no emotion, a thin line across his lips. 

“Nothing..” Jungkook sounded inaudible as his chest grew with the inhalation of his breath. He let out a loud sigh and you gulped at the boy’s condition. It was rare for him to look so serious. He was normally always making the most inappropriate jokes and comments. 

Keep reading

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yuri!!! on ice instagram: phichit chulanont, leo de la iglesia, & guang hong ji

(part 2/7) (part 1) (part 3) (part 4) (part 5) (part 6) (fancast)

Self-Care for Students

I am making this post because I have been demonstrating atrocious self-care. Well, I haven’t really been doing any self-care at all. So, for that reason, I am making this post to not only help myself but help other students as well—because I know I’m not the only one out there working non-stop and not taking time for myself!


Time Management

You may be wondering–how does time management fit into self-care? Time management has everything to do with self-care. If you don’t have good time management, then you are probably:

a) losing sleep to complete assignments

b) skipping meals to study

c) not taking time to just relax and de-stress

Make sure you are keeping track of your syllabuses and make sure you have enough time to complete each assignment.

Make appointments to relax whether that be alone, with friends, your s/o(s), or family.


School/College/University Counselor

If you are dealing with stress, anxiety, or depression, make sure you are taking care of your mental health!!! I can’t stress this enough!! Your mental and physical health comes first. If you are struggling with either, how can you be successful in your studies? Your well-being matters and you deserve to have some peace of mind during your school year.

Reach to out and take advantage of the resources that your school offers. Most schools should have a therapist/counselor on campus. If you don’t know how to see a counselor, ask around. This can be a good option for those who cannot afford therapy and/or do not have the time to go to a therapist outside of school!


Exercise and eat healthy

This is something that easier said than done. This is something that I am working on as well. My university has a gym, and I always try my best to get there, but the past few weeks of school have just been so busy and I haven’t had the chance to go.

This may be hard, but try your best to get exercise, even if it is only ten minutes. Even if it’s going for a short jog or running on the treadmill for a bit at the gym. Exercising has been proven to help with depression and stress. It’s also an important part of your overall health.

Many college students are familiar with the struggle to find affordable and healthy food. My university’s cafeteria in my school is ridiculously expensive and I bring a lunch every day. I commute so I am not familiar with things you could do if you are living on campus. If you have any times for dorm students, please feel free to add them!

I can make a post in the future about affordable food for college students.


Treat yo’ self!

That’s right! You heard me! Last week I went up to Chinatown and bought myself and lychee crepe—because I’m worth it (I’m working on building my poor self-esteem—I’ll make a post about that later). Celebrate your success by doing little things for yourself. It doesn’t need to be big. It could be taking a nice bath, go to a movie, hang out with a friend, etc. Going to school can be stressful and it’s important to take some time to do fun things for yourself. You work so hard! You deserve it!


This is by no means an exhaustive list. Please add anything that you feel is important for self-care for students!

French students harass and bully me for asking them to speak English in an English-taught class, so I get them expelled.

This happened a few years back in China, at one of the universities there. Here, I was studying Chinese language and I shared my language class with some people from France and Belgium (the French speaking part). Our Chinese teacher was a really nice little lady that happened to also speak French. So often, whenever the French speakers had a question, they would ask it in French. Now, I didn’t really mind it all that much but at some point, it got to the point where about half of the questions in the class were asked in a language I did not understand. Obviously that is detrimental to my own learning experience since understanding the questions is important for me to learn the language. So I politely asked them if we could just do the class in English because about half of us didn’t understand what was being asked.

Laoshi (the teacher) was very nice about it and afterwards, asked the students if they could rephrase their question in English when they asked it in French. But apparently the French and Belgian girls and guys didn’t take it so well. They were constantly glaring at me, and whispering among themselves in French. Well, I just shrugged and moved on.

However, outside of class they were always sticking together in their own little group, doing things together. At first they would just walk past me when I was sitting down having a beer with my friends, and they would simply glare. But at some point it came down to them cursing, talking shit about me to other students and spitting on my lap when I was sitting in the park. Obviously I was seething so I might have called them a few words which were a bit too unsavoury. Anyhow, they didn’t take it well.

So the next day, I found out that they scribbled all sorts of things on my dorm room. It said ‘肏你妈’ (basically: fuck your mother) and 'nazi’ (I don’t actually know why they put this one. I think they thought I was German, which I’m not). Obviously I was pissed, but I didn’t really know what to do so I reported it to the International Student Office. ISO was really nice and understanding, but told me they can’t actually do much unless I provide proof that something is happening.

Thus, I went on Taobao and and bought a little recording camera (looked a bit like a dashcam, it had the time and date and everything). After the university had painted my room door over (they couldn’t get the markers off apparently) I hung the camera up in a corner of our dorm corridor and pointed it at my door. Then I left and made sure to loop around a little bit to walk past the group of French/Belgians so that they knew I was leaving campus towards the metro station.

I had some nice dumpling soup and a beer and when I came back, look and behold! Once again they were hardly creative with their insults (just more of the same) but this time I had proof! I checked the video and I was very pleased: 5 out of 7 of the group were actually there, and all wrote down something on the door with permanent marker. One of the guys even kicked the door which caused a crack at the bottom (these doors were not very sturdy). They seemed to have a lot of fun doing it.

Now, of course the school was properly pissed when I showed them the video. Normally the students would just get a stern warning but because ISO was aware that they were doing it before, and also about the fact that they were harassing me all the time (I reported everything to them when it happened) they were less than understanding this time and suggested the board that had to decide on this (no idea what their name was, I couldn’t recognize their name in Hanzi) to expell the students.

And so they were. All of this took place over the course of a couple of months, so we were nearing the end of the semester. The five students who scribbled at my door got expelled just before their exams, which meant that all the time they spent at the university was effectively worthless since they did not receive any credits for it. But it gets even better. After this whole ordeal, I sent a neat (anonymous) letter in Chinese (one of my Chinese friends helped me write it) to the Public Security Bureau that these students had engaged in vandalism at our university. A few weeks later, after I had already returned home, I was told by a friend of mine who was on good terms with their group that some of them had booked tickets and hostels to travel in China at the end of the semester. However, their visa extension was denied by the Public Security Bureau on the basis of their misdemeanour at the university.

I’m not sure if the second part was caused because of my letter, or simply because the university informed the police, but I like to pretend that it was the former. So I was just laughing my ass off as they slaved away half a year in courses for which they would receive no credit, and had to cancel thousands worth of travel plans. That truly was a sweet, sweet feeling.

 🎃    HALLOWEEN   SENTENCE    PROMPTS  !

  • ​❝ happy halloween!
  • ❝ are you going to go to this halloween part with me tonight?
  • ❝ it’s halloween, so everyone is going to be dressed up. ❞
  • ​❝ is that your idea of a costume?
  • ❝ i thought we agreed to stay in and have a horror movie marathon. ❞
  • ❝ i went to the store and bought all new halloween decorations. ❞
  • ​❝ are you going to help me put up these halloween lights?
  • ​❝ it’s halloween and we are spending it by going to a haunted house. ❞
  • ​❝ i have plans halloween night, unlike you. ❞
  • ​❝ we can always go to the pumpkin patch instead. ❞
  • ​❝ are you going to help me carve these pumpkins or not?
  • ​❝ aww, where’s your halloween spirit?
  • ​❝ look, i carved this pumpkin all by myself, what do you think?
  • ​❝ wanna go out with me for halloween?
  • ​❝ come on, halloween’s not so bad. it’s actually fun. ❞
  • ​❝ okay, i’ve got the best ghost story, wanna hear?
  • ​❝ let’s go trick-or-treating!
  • ❝ are you going to take me trick or treating this year again?
  • ​❝ come on, we have to go buy costumes for this party. ❞
  • ​❝ it’s going to be cold on halloween, are you sure you want to wear that?
  • ​❝ you are literally the same thing every year for halloween. ❞
  • ​❝ please, enough with the pumpkin spice. ❞
  • ​❝ how about a pumpkin spice latte?
  • ❝ please, never use fake blood for a halloween prank. ❞
  • ❝ oh no, please, tell me this isn’t another one of your ideas for a halloween prank. ❞
  • ❝ you think you can scare me?
  • ❝ remember to always check your candy!
  • ❝ where is all the candy i just bought?
  • ❝ we are not going to a cemetery just because it may or may not be haunted. ❞
  • ❝ i’m not going in a graveyard, are you crazy?
  • ❝ i’m going to dress up as the grim reaper because i feel like death. ❞
  • ❝ trick or treat. ❞
  • ❝ want to trade out some of our candy?
  • ❝ we should do a halloween game, like truth or dare ‘cept it’s trick or treat?
  • ❝ what school has a halloween dance party?
  • ❝ what are you going as for halloween this year?
  • ❝ are we really going to carve all these pumpkins?
  • ❝ you know, that was the best halloween party ever. ❞
  • ❝ i’m going to a halloween party and you’re not invited. ❞
  • ❝ you should totally come with me for this halloween thing tonight. ❞
  • ❝ we can stay up late and watch scary movies. ❞
  • ❝ i wanna make sure that my jack-o-lantern is the best!
  • ❝ let’s see who can carve there pumpkins the fastest!
  • ❝ i can’t believe they put some of these costumes on the racks. ❞
  • ❝ what’s the point in decorating your house for just one night?
  • ❝ i’ve got a spooky story for you, if you want to hear. ❞
  • ❝ do we have to go to this haunted trail?
  • ❝ that haunted trail/house sucked, i want my money back. ❞
  • ❝ i didn’t see you at the halloween festival earlier. ❞
  • ❝ i have to take my ______ trick or treating, or else i would. ❞
  • ❝ are you going to the halloween thing they are having today?
  • ❝ do you really think the dead are roaming free among us on halloween night?
  • ❝ halloween is my favorite holiday, so i’m going with or without you. ❞
  • ❝ you want to help me set up this halloween party?
  • ❝ this is going to be the best halloween of all time. ❞
  • ❝ i’m just saying, let loose and have some fun for a change. ❞
  • ❝ we should just make our own costumes. ❞
  • ❝ we’re definitely getting matching costumes.  ❞
  • ❝ i entered are names for this costume contest, one of us will definitely win. ❞
  • ❝ i do not want to be in a costume contest. ❞
  • ❝ wait, what? you don’t want to do anything at all on halloween night?
  • ❝ well, it’s over. now we have to wait all the way until next year. ❞
Case Closed (Jungkook x Reader)

Admin: Candi
Request: Can i request a rough jungkook smut? Thx btw.. – anon”
Fandom: BTS
Member/reader: Jungkook x Reader
Genre: Smut, Lawyer!AU
Warnings: Smoking, language, hair pulling, daddy kink, spitting, slapping, choking
Words: 3.6k
Authors note: O this is a treat for all you jungkook stans, hope you enjoy it and lemme know what you think. Thank you! Also I ain’t a lawyer so don’t judge my case scene lmao.

           As a child you always thought you’d end up being a vet, then during your teens you wanted to be a tattoo artist since you entered the rebellious phase at that stage. Throughout the years you never saw yourself as a lawyer but here you are, your first case was happening today and you were going against the most respected and feared lawyer in the company. His name was Jungkook and he always won every case. You wanted to kick your boss in the teeth for putting you up against Jungkook for your first ever case but you were also quite flattered knowing that your boss thought you’re good enough to go against Jungkook.

           The case has been going on for a few months, your client was a victim of identity fraud and Jungkook was defending the person who did it. If the judge had any common sense you’d easily win the case but it’s not about that, it’s about knowledge and confidence, it’s much like having a debate; the more facts you put forward the more likely you’ll win.

Keep reading

Someone: Why are you so upset about Kaede?

Me internally: Kaede Akamatsu had the potential to be a fantastic character and a groundbreaking protagonist for the series. From the moment the prologue ends, she successfully united everyone and was able to push them towards an escape route, something no previous protagonist has ever done. Her self-esteem is stable and uplifting unlike previous protagonists like Makoto, Komaru, even Hajime despite the fact his problems weren’t displayed front and center from the beginning by the end we knew how deep they went but Kaede genuinely was a fully self-assured confident protagonist. And it didn’t stop there. When her first plan didn’t work she immediately began working on other ways to escape. But, instead of having a game with an active character leading the scene she gets the fridge for Shuichi. This is bad enough, but it’s even worse seeing how it plays out afterwards. After her death, everyone plays her up as some glorious angel despite the fact that, no matter what her intentions were, she went behind Shuichi, and all of her friends backs and killed an innocent. It would at least be cool to play the idea that Kaede was so driven by her want to save everyone she ended up doing something awful, because that makes her an interesting and multi-layered character, but this fact is never bought center stage and instead the narrative portrays her as some kind of saint, with the only people who kinda call her misdeeds to attention being Angie and Kokichi. After her death, Shuichi constantly thinks, ‘Kaede entrusted me her wish’, ‘Kaede believed in me’, and other such thoughts which really drives home the point that she existed to make him feel sad, and that’s annoying because before she got the axe they had a good dynamic. She was the one who pushed him when he wasn’t feeling up to it, and he was the one who anchored her when she was getting overeccentric. That’s a romance I would be far more willing to see carry a game than having our main character cry over someone who he knew for less than a week. This show of manpain and glorification is at its worst when it’s revealed she was framed by the mastermind at the end, which in addition to letting us in that she was quite literally killed off for no reason, is used as a way to say she’s innocent despite the fact that she still orchestrated, and almost successfuly carried out a murder that could have led to poor Rantarou dead on the floor. Shuichi isn’t a terrible protagonist, but the poor writing for Kaede as nothing more than a plot device for angst, and waifu bait was a heavy dissapointment.

Me externally: I wanted to play as a girl lol

knowing we have a new taylor swift album coming out so soon makes me think back to when 1989 came out and how i stayed up all night to listen to it. i remember it so perfectly, like it was yesterday. after i listened to the album in full, i ran down to listen with my mom and then so many times after that and i’m not even sure i slept that night. i got up super early the next morning and went to target and bought so many physical copies of the album, running errands and blasting the cd in the car. 1989 will always mean so much to me, it will always be such a special album to me and hold a piece of my heart. it was the era i grew closer to taylor, the album that made me stop caring what other people thought about me and dance like no ones watching. every single one of taylor’s albums have taught me something and i can’t wait to see what part reputation will play into my life this time.

Going out

Jungkook: MAN last night was crazy!

Seokjin: *suspiciously* how so?

Taehyung: me and kookie went out for the night and it was WILD

Namjoon: where did you go?

Taehyung: we went to a club and did some insane stuff.

Hoseok: like what?

Jungkook: well we danced, and we bought some pizza, went surfing for a while and threw snowballs at people.

Yoongi: for the last time you two, leaving the house and playing club penguin on your laptop on the bench outside all night is not considered going out.

richie as things ive done

-maxed out my phone storage because i saved too many pictures of flags after deciding that i was going to text exclusively in semaphore

-walked up a 2-story railing because i was bored and then did it again because the first time my friend didnt get pictures

-crawled underneath a train because i dropped my flip flop

-spent too much money on thrift store knick knacks with cursed energy (puppets, garden gnomes, ceramic figurines, other peoples’ family photos, etc)

-spent too much money on awful thrift store clothes

-made a valiant attempt to bring silly bandz back

-ate over 100 rolls of smarties in a 48-hour period

-ignored the fact that i had the flu or something for a week. just genuinely did not realize until someone pointed it out

-locked myself in a school bathroom stall with my friends so i could draw sunglasses on her nipples with expo marker

-got in trouble for holding a baby doll like a real baby in english class

-filled said baby with chocolate milk and barbecue sauce “to feed it” and punted it across the bathroom

-bought my friend a custom life-sized body pillow of her fav actor for her birthday and hid it in her locker for a terrifying morning surprise

-bought a ball gag at goodwill

-gave a chemistry presentation to my entire class and forgot to remove the slide with a picture of a frog with a speech bubble that said “hnnng… i need… your spit”

-ate a lock of wig hair for a video that we were filming

-accidentally yelled “FUCK” in french class as soon as the room had gone silent

-kept loose cheese puffs in my desk drawer

-kept a dixie cup of chocolate chips in my desk drawer

-accidentally came into possession of 78 decorative gourds and didnt know where to put them so i left them in the top of my locker and they rotted

-got in trouble in sixth grade on valentines day for giving a boy a small potato instead of a paper valentine

-tried to wriggle my body through a saint patrick’s day wreath at a thrift store and got very, very, very stuck

-was the ringbearer for a wedding and said “oh, swag” on reflex when i dropped the rings

-challenged myself to write all my in-class essays so that they could be read to the tune of ‘two trucks’ and no one ever found out

-brought pot brownies to an anime convention

-stayed up for days on end until i was so tired that i fell asleep while writing an in-class essay and kept writing gibberish while fully asleep

-got an a in a class where i literally never turned in the homework

-changed my text tone to an audio recording of my best friend saying something embarrassing

-went through a phase where i would write several pages of notes on one page in different colors until it looked like just horrible scribbles “to save paper”

-bought parchment and a quill pen on amazon and used them to take notes

-had to leave a party early but i was eating fishsticks and i wasnt done so i put them all in my coat pocket

-kept loose dumplings in my hoodie pocket

-wore a fanny pack with a speaker in it and blasted ‘two trucks’ and also used the fanny pack to carry a bag of gummi worms and give them to people when they were upset that i called ‘emotional support worms’

-bought a whole-ass rocking horse and then took it home on the bus

-drank monster energy out of my parents’ wedding-gift wine glasses

-babysat some kids and helped them turn the entire first floor of their house into a fort for a brutal nerf gun war

-started a black market in third grade where the primary trade was colored pencils and cap erasers

-made direct eye contact with my teacher and said ‘because i am a dumbass’ when asked why i didnt have the homework

-went to a burger place where the workers yell out the order numbers and when they yelled “69!” muscle memory took over and i yelled back “NICE”

-tried to convince my friend to chug a glass of dairy free creamer until i got tired of waiting and grabbed it out of her hands and chugged it myself

-bought an animatronic bear at a thrift store and spent an hour trying to pry open the battery case to discover that it sings When I’m 64. like the whole song all the way through

-got lost in best buy for two hours and ended up leaving with a Dory backpack that was on sale

-kept a headless antique mannequin in my room at the foot of my bed to train myself out of feeling fear

-in fifth grade i attempted to physically fight another fifth grader over our minecraft fanfiction

-skipped swimming class for an entire trimester and somehow faced no repercussions

-stole a girl’s hair out of her hairbrush in fourth grade and used it for crafts

-pinned my friend to the floor and rubbed a gluestick on her face i don’t remember why

-got my friends to pool all our money at sky high so we could put cotton eyed joe into the jukebox as many times as possible

-started an uprising against our lunchtime therapist in fourth grade by convincing all of my friends to make warriors ocs with me instead of participating in the activities (this culminated in the four of us getting kicked out of lunchtime therapy)

-made my first friend in high school because she saw me secretly eating twizzlers out of my sleeve in english class

-found loose jelly beans in my school bag and ate them without question

;lit me up (m)

pairing— kim namjoon x reader, author! namjoon
genre/warnings— smut, slight angst, romance
words— 9,222

:: summary— you find yourself becoming captivated by a mysterious, handsome author, but you may have bitten off more than you can chew…

note— extracts taken from the bts highlight reels, found here and the serendipity lyrics, found here. Inspired by the song found here.

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