[mine: grimm]

Evolution of Snowbaz

Simon: baz baz baz baz baz thet dern baz alweys plotin agenst me…
Baz: lmao i luv simon v much but he a idiot

Simon: woah there dude baz looks real gud in jeans oml

Baz: im ugly vampy i shud die lol
Simon: lmao u shud not, insted u shud nut
Baz: whet

Simon: so bazy pich r we officul cuz we made out lyk 3 tymes lmao
Baz: idk r u even gey leik me
Simon: idk lol
Baz: ur stupid lol

Baz: lol whet r u doin at my house agen i thout u wanna b with those grls
Simon: but i wanna b wif u bb

Baz: ily
Simon: ily2
Penny: oh lmao that makes cents they r datin

Simon: lol i gotta tail an wings
Baz: I still wuv u, carry on simon snow <3

Simon Loses His Wedding Ring

Slight angst/Fluff

Warnings: None

Simon being his unorganized self


I noticed this afternoon. I was waiting in the lobby of the dentist’s office. I reached over with my left hand to twist the ring with my thumb and forefinger; a nervous habit. But, when I went to grab the ring, it was gone. I searched under the chair I had been sitting in, and I retraced my steps through the entrance. The receptionist probably thought I was insane. When Penny came to pick me up, I didn’t even get in the car. I just immediately started searching the passenger seat. After a moment of staring in confusion, she asked what I was doing. “I lost my ring,” I push the seat back so I can search under it. “Well, when did you last have it?” “Our wedding day. I don’t know,” I don’t pay attention to these things. The ring is always there. I never expected to have to know when the last time I’d see it was. “..Two years ago,” Penny raises an eyebrow. I shake my head. “I don’t know, okay? I never take it off. It shouldn’t be gone,” I fix the seat and collapse in it, defeated. Penny sighs. “It’s just a ring. We’ll find it. You don’t leave the house that much,” She teases. I groan. “It’s not “just a ring.” It’s my wedding ring. From Baz. He’s going to hate me,” I can see it now, the sneers and slammed doors. It’ll be watford all over again. I don’t know how to tell him. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 I lift my right hand up, in front of my face. I examine my ring finger…again. It’s still bare; just as it had been 10 seconds ago. I don’t know how long it’s been like this. It could have been missing long before today. I’m sitting on our sofa now, still staring at my hand, waiting for him to come home. I still don’t know how he’s going to react. I’m terrified. The last thing I want is to argue with him. Maybe it’ll be fine. He’ll laugh at me for even worrying about it. I hear the front door swing open and immediately lift my head. He walks in, tall and pale as always, his dark hair frames his face perfectly. He’s smiling. He smiles a lot more in these last two years than he ever did at Watford. I’m not ready ruin his good mood. But, it’s too late. When he sees the nervous look on my face, the smile fades. “What’s wrong Si,” he steps forward and sits next to me on the couch. I take a breath. I could be over exaggerating. This may not really be a big deal. I just have to say it and find out. “I…um…,” it’ll be fine. He won’t be mad. He won’t be mad. “Did you find out you have a cavity? I bet it’s from all the aero bars,” he teases. “I lost my ring,” he’s silent. Maybe it won’t be ‘fine.’ I wait a short moment before I look over at him and study his face. His eyebrows are drawn together and his eyes seem to be filled with…sadness? He’s not angry. He’s upset. “I’m sorry. I looked everywhere.. But, that doesn’t really mean anything. I’m just unorganized. I’m sure we’ll find it. Or..or I’ll buy a new one,” The words spill out as quick as they can. I can’t let him be sad. “You can’t just replace it. It was my mom’s,” he whispers. His words are filled with sadness and venom. He drops his head into his hands. The feeling of guilt inside of me doubles, to an impossible amount. How could I have been so careless? How could I have forgotten? He told me on the day of our wedding. I should have been more careful. “Oh… Oh… Baz, I’m so sorry,” I wrap my arms around him and pull him close. He leans his head on my shoulder. I can feel the tears soaking my shirt. It was even more than just a wedding ring. It was one of the few things from his mom that he had left, and I lost it. I have to find it. “I’ll find it. I promise,” I murmur. I have to. I try to remember the last time I had it on. I mentally go through the last few days. I was wearing it Monday, when we went for a walk to the dog park. One of the puppies was gnawing my fingers. I was wearing it Tuesday, while we were shopping for paint for our bedroom. I took it off on Tuesday afternoon, so I wouldn’t get any paint on it. I took it off Tuesday afternoon, in the bathroom. I quickly let go of Baz and jump up. “I know where it is,” I dash to the bathroom and search the counter. It has to be here. It has to. I lift my head, and my eyes meet the soap dish. A glimmer of silver shines on it. I rush over. Sitting in the dish, where the soap would have been, if I didn’t stubbornly insist on only using liquid, is the tangle of silver vines. I gently pick up the ring, careful not to drop it, and I rush back out to Baz. “I found it. I got it,” I’m out of breath. But, I don’t stop to breathe until he looks up, and I know he heard me. I hold my palm out to show him the ring. His eyes are still red but he isn’t crying anymore. In fact, he’s laughing. “Snow, you are an absolute mess,” he giggles and takes the ring. “You don’t hate me?” He pulls me by my hand so that I land next to him on the cushion. “Of course not. I could never hate you, you numpty. I love you,” he takes my hand and slides the ring onto my finger. I lean in and our lips meet. He’s still as cold as ever, just like the first time we kissed. Except, it’s better this time. He doesn’t want to die anymore. There isn’t a war separating us. We’re married and we’re in love. “I’ll always love you.”

  • “Hey! I didn’t know you couldn’t sing!”
  • “Sorry, guess I should have worn my airbag today.”
  • “A gift basket would have been nice!”
  • “I don’t need you for what you know, I need your nose!”
  • “Boy, you really know how to butter a guy up for a favour.”
  • “Death by Hokey Pokey.”
  • “Don’t you dare say ‘heel’!”
  • “Good boy.”
  • “Death… by rat?”
  • “How many rats?”
  • “Just for the record, I didn’t actually kill her. She impaled herself.”
  • “Alligators don’t rob houses.”
  • “Nobody was probed… yet.”
  • “Oookay, that warrants a 'how the hell did it do that’?!”
  • “Well, when a mommy and daddy love each other very much…”
  • “Dude, I gotta be honest. Your mother scares the crap outta me.”
  • “I told you to meet me, not eat me!”
  • “Your whole face looks like a volcano that’s about to explode.”
  • “What up, bro?”
  • “Well, I’m glad you know how to clock a dude with a brick.”
  • “Ah, just what I need. An entrance to Hell.”
  • “He ate a baby. That’s rude.”
  • “Dude, join the misunderstood.”
  • “Actually, that was a paraphrase. I left out the bad language because I can’t write that fast.”
  • “I haven’t had this much fun since that drunk threw up on me at the Christmas party.”
  • “Seriously? That’s like a beer and half an onion ring.”
  • “What am I? Your personal Wikipedia?”
  • “I wasn’t pissing on the fence for kicks.”
  • “It’s obvious. It was committed by a barefooted man carrying a wolf.”
  • “Next time we hire an intern I’m going to suggest they do a better psych evaluation.”
  • “My baking days are over…”
  • “Woah, hold on. This is one of those “pause, take a deep breath” situations where you can’t be going off half, full, or any other degree of cocked.”
  • “We’re supposed to pull out his eye with a spoon?”
  • “That’s gotta be uncomfortable…”

“I want a show with an original plot line.”

“I want a show that represents POC in a good light.”

“I want a show that has beautiful people as actors.”

“I want a show with great characters that ill grow to love.”

“I want a show that doesn’t kill off main characters for a plot line.”

“I want a show that doesn’t use homophobic/racist/sexist jokes.”

“I want a show that’s underrated.”

“I want a show that is serious, but can be cheesy and lighthearted at times.”

“I want a show with more than two seasons.”

“I want a show that fucking rocks and GETS ME PUMPED.”


Witch-like creature that somewhat resembles a demon or goblin. They work at the behest of royalty and are identifiable by a dark birthmark under their tongues.

  • Appears to be eyeless when transformed but has no visual impairment.
  • Extraordinary beauty in human form.
  • Highly intelligent and cunning.