[md]

6 Sarcastic Guys’ Conversation.

6 SARCASTIC GUYS’ CONVERSATION (SEVERAL FANDOMS CROSSOVER): Fanfic? (because I wanted to write this ever since I saw a post similar to this)

Who’s in the house?

-  House

-  Jack Sparrow

-  Tony Stark

-  Sherlock

-  Dean Winchester

-  …?

What do they have in common?

(You don’t have to know all of the characters)

Narcissism, sarcasm, some are genius’, most are experts in their work, all of them have drinking/drug dependencies, most have childhood issues and are secretly full of angst, etc.

Summary: This is just them, trapped in a room together, with no idea how they got there or how to get out. There may be more characters to come…

Warnings: Not much, a bit of swearing.

Comments are well appreciated (nice comments, helpful comments etc.)

Part 1

Jack: Now, the real question remains: Where is the rum?

House glared at him.

House: That’s not the real question, dumbass. I wanna know what the hell we’re doing here.

Tony: Maybe it’s a house party.

Sherlock is bent down by the door, his nose alarmingly close to the floor.

Tony: Ok, curly, what’re you doing now?

Sherlock looks up frowning, realising he’s being addressed.

Sherlock: I’m checking to see what substances there are in order to determine where we are, which is a lot more than any of you lot are doing.

Tony: *huffs* Well, excuse me, princess-

House: There’s no way of getting out of here.

House is sat by the window, and everyone looks up to him. He motions to the window with his cane.

House: These windows are fake. That door is impenetrable, the walls are made with considerable strength, as we’ve found out, and none of us geniuses have any idea why we’re here, where we are, how we got here, or who sent us here.

Everyone was quiet.

Jack: Well, I for one, am not a genius – just to clarify.

Sherlock sighs and sits up against the wall.

Tony: Find anything?

Sherlock: No. There’s no evidence, no substances, no clues – just nothing.

He looked sullenly ahead.

Tony: Well, my Iron Man suit should be here anytime now.

Sherlock: It’s not going to work…

Tony screwed his eyes at him.

Tony: Well, I don’t think your ‘sniffing around’ is exactly doing to much to solve this problem either-

Jack: Ok, ok, ladies, lets settle down, shall we? Look, we only have each other in this neat room of ours, and if we start fighting, it all goes downhill from there, and frankly, I think we’d all know who would be the only one standing after that.

Jack smiled smugly to himself.

House sighs and mutters something like ‘imbecile’.

Jack: What was that now?

Sherlock looked over as House sighs, and rubs his leg with his hand, his cane to the side.

Tony: What happened to you?

House looks up and replies sarcastically: I tripped.

Tony: Well don’t get your knickers in a twist, Doc, I was only asking.

Sherlock: He got shot.

House looked over to him.

House: How the hell do you know that?

Jack: Oh, God, don’t ask him for an explanation, I’m beggin’ you.

Sherlock: Well, it’s clear from the way he holds his leg that he’s in obvious pain-

Jack: Here we go..

Sherlock, ignoring the interruption: and he’s used to it according to the heavy bags under his eyes from sleepless nights, and he’s bitter, a sign of long-lasting pain, so why wouldn’t you do something about it? Well, it’s obvious he’s tried drugs-

House: Shut the hell up.

Sherlock: – takes one to know one – but they didn’t work out, did they? Got too dependent on them, so now you just have to take the pain – and by yourself – I mean, it’s obvious that you’re lonely.

House stands up with his cane: I said SHUT UP!

He went over to Sherlock and squared up to him.

Tony and Jack looked at each other wide-eyed.

House: You think you’re some big genius, who can just figure everyone out by one look-

Sherlock: Well, yea, pretty much-

But suddenly there was a big BANG as the door came flying inwards.
They all shielded themselves as the door was smashed down and smoke covered them, some of them coughing, as Sherlock quickly walking over the new body that was now on the floor, coughed through the smoke and went through the door, just to see another door a few feet behind it.

Sherlock: Dammit.

House looked around.

House: Everyone alright?
Jack: Just dandy

House grimaced as he put his cane down and knelt to the man on the floor, turning him onto his back so they could see him, Tony kneeling next to him.

Tony: You know him?

House: Nope.

House leant down to check the man’s breathing, when suddenly he snapped up and looked around frantically, his golden necklace swaying across his chest.

Man: What the hell – oh, son of a bitch.

He held onto his head, wincing slightly and cursed to himself.

House: What’s your name? Do you know how you got here?

Sherlock and Jack crowded round to listen.

Man: Name’s Dean Winchester. And I have no clue, man.

you are still a valid little if you:

• have tattoos or body piercings
• smoke / drink / use
• embrace your sexuality
• didn’t have a troubled childhood
• still live with your parents
• are overweight / underweight
• drink from a regular glass
• don’t wear diapers / pull-ups
• don’t wear onesies or footie pajamas
• dislike using pacifiers
• prefer showers over baths
• would rather collect books instead of stuffed animals
• think glitter is too messy to keep around
• pink or blue ( or rainbow ) isn’t your color
• find coloring / crafts boring 
• find cartoons or disney movies non-entertaining
• don’t eat sweets
• dislike chicken nuggets / fruit snacks / macaroni & cheese
• dislike juices or milk
• prefer actual children over animals
• have kids / are pregnant
• need space / alone time
• have a mental disorder ( not only anxiety & depression )
• have a physical disability
• are a member of the lgbtq+ community
• don’t have a caregiver
• & more…

you are too unique to fall under a stereotype perfectly so don’t worry about your body type, regressors, or whether you’re a “real little” or not, you are valid no matter the situation. there are no rules to “little” - all you need is yourself to get lost in the feeling.

How to Tell if I’m in Little Space
  • High-pitched squeals in response to small animals
  • Cuddling onto anyone nearby
  • Carrying my favorite stuffy around
  • Overly excited about cake and/or ice cream
  • Saying “Mommy Mommy Mommy Mommy” under my breath over and over again
  • Whining
  • Sensitive to everything
  • Making my stuffies dance and then giving them little kisses
  • Fuzzy socks~!
  • Lisp becomes more noticeable (”th” because “f” and “r” becomes “w” and “ll” turns into “ww”)
  • Sleepy at a reasonable time but “dun wanna go to bed”
3

House m.d. (2008) // Sherlock (2017)

House: I’m sorry. I know I didn’t try to kill her. I know I didn’t want her hurt. I know it was a freak accident. But I feel like crap, and she’s dead because of me.
Wilson: I don’t blame you. I wanted to. I tried to. I must have reviewed Amber’s case file 100 times to find a way. But it wasn’t your fault.
House: Then we’re okay? I mean, I know you’re not, but… Maybe I can help.
Wilson: We’re not okay. Amber was never the reason I was leaving. I didn’t want to tell you because… because I was trying, like I always do, to protect you. Which is the problem. You spread misery because you can’t feel anything else. You manipulate people because you can’t handle any kind of real relationship. And I’ve enabled it. For years. The games, the binges, the middle-of-the-night phone calls. I should have been the one on the bus, not —You should have been alone on the bus. If I’ve learned anything from Amber, it’s that I have to take care of myself. We’re not friends anymore, House.

                                                                  House m.d. -  Dying Changes Everything, 5x01

Aight imma just throw this out here.

I support all littles, caregivers, age regressors, and anyone else.

I support trans and non binary littles and caregivers.

I support underage littles and caregivers.

I support caregivers who like being called mommy or daddy.

I support caregivers who don’t like terms such as those.

I support those who age play, as long as it is safe and consensual.

I support those who are completely non sexual regressors.

I support what ever label you classify yourself under, as long as you aren’t causing issues for others in that community.

You can be kidhearted, or dd/lg, or cglre, or liltot, or chire, or whatever your heart desires.

Just be respectful.