Season 12

Season 11

They did it. They actually fucking did it! They are really dealing with Mary’s trauma and the fact that to her, she just lost her entire family. I never thought they would actually delve this much into character. I’m thrilled with this much of a character driven story.

But holy hell did that hurt. Poor Dean. As if he didn’t already think he was trash. The one person in the world who he thought would want him just told him she needs space and to Dean’s fucked up mind, you know he felt every word as rejection. My heart is breaking.

Supernatural Season 12

Watch Supernatural Season 12 Episode 3 : The Foundry

Watch Supernatural Season 12 Episode 2 : Mamma Mia

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Supernatural Summary

Sam Winchester is a college student bound for law school, determined to escape his family’s past - unlike his older brother, Dean. Ever since they were little their father has been consumed with an obsession to find the evil forces that murdered his beloved wife, and recruited his two young sons to help them. They have grown up as hunters of the supernatural. Sam escaped this way of life after high school, and now has a happy life with his girlfriend, Jessica, and a promising future career. Dean, however, stayed behind with his father to join him in his “hunting”.

After Dean arrives for Sam’s help when their father goes missing, Sam must join his brother to find him. His one weekend trip to search for the missing John Winchester becomes an ongoing quest after a horrible tragedy ruins any thought of a happy life for Sam.

The two brothers, bound by tragedy and blood to their mission, travel across the country encountering terrifying and dangerous forces most believe to be nothing but superstition and folklore, such as the Lady in White, the Indian beast known as the Wendigo, Phantom Travelers who cause plane crashes, Bloody Mary, and many more.

12.03 coda

He doesn’t just flee to his room. He runs.

He would have slammed the door behind him but he doesn’t think he has the strength left. Figures. Can’t hold his family together, can’t hold himself together -

He feels his breath hitch painfully in his chest long before he even realizes that he’s crying.

He sits down on the bed. He doesn’t have anything left to do. He can’t even hear Sam’s footsteps in the hallway. Gone, gone, everyone’s gone, he’s all alone again, why does everybody keep leaving him?

He doesn’t even pick up the phone. His breath just hitches again and he throws his head into his hands.

“Cas,” he sobs. And once the dam has broken, his shoulders start to shake in earnest.

Dean thinks that it’s possible he’s never felt pain like this before. His mother’s always been taken from him, never left him. She was safety and security and warmth. She was the star of Bethlehem that called him home, that called him back to himself. He’s stared at her photograph countless times and seen only love in her eyes.

But now she’s left him, too.

His legs have cramped something awful from sitting so long in this position by the time his bedroom door cracks open, but he falls pliantly into Castiel’s grip once he gets his arms around him.

“I came as soon as - Dean. Dean, it’s ok.”

Dean shakes his head, buries his face into Castiel’s chest. “She’s gone, she’s gone,” he keeps mumbling, in between bouts of tears. He’s distantly aware that he’s smearing the salt of them into Castiel’s thin shirt, but Castiel just holds on. He runs a hand through Dean’s hair, soothing and gentle just like he remembers his mom doing when he was -

So he cries and he cries and he cries, and he lets Castiel hold him. And he curls his hands into the lapels of Castiel’s suit jacket and his thighs quiver like he’s made of water.

“What did I do wrong?” he whimpers. 

Castiel makes a sound like he’s halfway to sobbing himself. “Nothing,” he tells him. “Nothing, you did nothing wrong, it isn’t you,” he promises. He says it over and over and over again.

Castiel kisses the crown of Dean’s head and rubs his hands down his back. “I’m so sorry. I’m sorry,” he says.

Eventually, Dean will tire himself out. He’ll lie back against the pillows and he will drag Castiel down with him. He’ll wake up sweating from a nightmare about his mom burning on the ceiling - one that he hasn’t had in years. He’ll still feel ice shards digging their way to the center of his heart, and remember that it was Mary’s hand sending them deeper.

Everybody leaves me.

Castiel touches the back of his neck, and he feels a little steadier.

But at least there’s someone that always comes back.