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SCP dragon

@scpdragon

i am 22, my blog is not nsfw. icon and header made by @justlgbtqthings. i use a tag of "rare post" or "legendary post" often. no queue I dont have the energy.

Welcome new followers who do not quite look like porn bots.

A word of advice: If you only hit the Like heart, your blog appears to be empty and your tumblr experience will not be good. Because people will block you.

I will block you.

Get reblogging, fill your blog. This is how it's done here.

If for whatever reason you don't feel comfortable reblogging yet, literally just make one single text post saying something like "hey I'm new to tumblr and still figuring out the culture! Not a bot, pls don't block me." An empty blog is an instant report spam.

sorry about this guys, but very much this. i have discovered that if you MISS blocking a porn bot this often results in like five times as many of them and the morning "oh god another one" process becomes much worse, so I'm straight up doing "hrm no posts WELP - "

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if youre gonna fuck the robot, fuck the robot the way god intended

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for reference this is more about finding just as much appeal in the original designs of robot/nonhuman characters as you would their "human" fanmade versions

me holding a gun to a mushroom: tell me the name of god you fungal piece of shit
mushroom: can you feel your heart burning? can you feel the struggle within? the fear within me is beyond anything your soul can make. you cannot kill me in a way that matters
me cocking the gun, tears streaming down my face: I’M NOT FUCKING SCARED OF YOU

Hey OP? What the FUCK does this mean?

decay exists as an extant form of life

That’s a terrifying answer, have a nice day

Feel uncomfortable going to Cheesecake Factory when it’s so under the watch of the eye of Sauron

I made this post in 2016 and it got 3 notes, suddenly people are interacting with it. What is happening how did you even find it

How doe this post have less than 1,000 notes when “The Eye Of Sauron at the Cheesecake factory” has been living rent-free in my head for almost a decade?

Apparently someone left a lighter in their pocket and all of That is from the gas released when the lighter ruptured

So there's slightly more to it than that, that dryer is a natural gas dryer rather than a purely electric one. So when the lighter went off (the initial small explosion) it damaged the sealed drum enough to get to the gas lines in the heating element of the dryer which then allowed the natural gas and oxygen to mix, hit the fire from the lighter, and result in the second MUCH LARGER blast.

This is one of the many reasons why you always check your pockets, and also why I've never owned a natural gas dryer, even though they're way more energy efficient than an electric one.

Also the choice of music is... Something

One of the best letters I’ve ever seen just popped up on my Facebook memories. Still makes me laugh.

As today is the 50th anniversary of the moon landing, it’s a great time to revisit Dinah from Devon’s memory of this historic event. And yes, still makes me laugh.

Today is the 54th anniversary of the moon landing, but Dinah’s diary entry is still absolutely magnificent.

Eldest’s Privilege (dp x dc)

“My brother got into a fist-fight with our mayor,” Jazz stated loudly, as she gestured with her cocktail glass, unbothered by the stares of the other patrons.

“My brother has bitten more than three socialites in the last month,” The equally inebriated man, who’d introduced himself as Dick, retorted at a similar volume.

“Well, my sister tried to kill my brother within the first three days of meeting him,” Jazz snipped back.

“My brother’s first murder attempt on his sibling was within the first three minutes of meeting him,” Dick answered primly as he stirred his drink.

The redhead narrowed her eyes as she grabbed the little decorative umbrella from her glass. She pointed it at Dick and retorted: “My sister went on a year-long solo trip to explore the world.”

The man squinted in return before he smirked, “My sister has been living in Hong Kong for two years now.”

“Well, my sister was twelve,” Jazz said triumphantly.

Dick blinked before he tilted his head consideringly. “Yeah, ok. You win this one.”

Jazz let out a victory cheer before downing the drink in her hand. Dick gave her a congratulatory pat and chugged his own drink

“What’s the score?” Jazz asked as she twirled the umbrella between her fingers, her head held up by her hand.

Dick frowned. “I forgot,” he said before fishing an ice-cube out of his glass and munching on it.

Jazz frowned too, before her face cleared and she perked up “A tie-breaker!” She exclaimed. “Whoever does the most shots wins by default.”

Dick’s eyes gained a competitive glint and he smirked. “Oh, you are so going down.”

For @softest-punk who’s hobhusband verse I read for the thousandth time today and got inspired. Here’s Hob meeting one of his in-laws

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It was one of the rare times that Death was able to get away from her busy schedule for more than a few moments, and Hob was not about to look a gift horse in the mouth.

They were currently the only two in the flat and were spending time together at the kitchen table drinking some local ale that Moira gifted him over the holidays when a thought popped into Hobs mind. He never really gave it much thought before-assuming that as with most things in the beginning- his gift was from Dream, and that was that. With the arrangement now, and knowing that prior assessment to be false, Hob turned to Death and pondered how to ask his question.

“Yes?” Death asked, seeing his stare.

“I was just wondering how I stayed the same age after all these years.” He started setting his mug down and playing with his fingers. “I just never really thought about it before, but your gift prevents me from dying, so how do I still look young.”

Death was silent for a bit, playing with her own mug, swirling the liquid around as she pondered his question.

“I never really thought of it much,” she finally admitted. “When I first made the wager with Dream, I just wanted him to see the beauty of humans. You all are-especially you-,” she paused and gave him a warm look, reaching between them to gently grab his hand from where he was still fiddling with them, “so full of life. I just wanted him to understand.” She stopped and shrugged, and Hob understood what she didn’t say. By now they all knew that Dream was in a bad place for a long time and was just starting to see that there was more to life than just his function.

“Anyway, if I had to guess I assume that Father had something to do with your preserved form.” She took back her hand to instead cup her mug and bring it to her mouth to take a long gulp.

Hob stared at the column of her neck admiring as he thought about what she said. He never gave much thought to the Endless parents as none of his spouses liked to talk about them. The closest being Delirium’s nonsensical musings about there being a black hole inside her sometimes, and the twins sharing a look.

“Why would he grant my body stasis- for lack of a better word?” He asked. His musings were starting to give him a headache the more he tried to wrap his head around the subject.

Death shrugged again, putting her now empty mug down. Hob pushed his half drunk glass towards her. He didn’t think drinking anymore would help with his burgeoning headache.

Just as she was finishing his mug, Death turnt her head and gazed off into distance with her ear cocked, listening to something Hob couldn’t hear.

“I got to go,” she said as she stood up. Hob got up and leaned towards her to press a chaste kiss to her cheek.

“I’ll see you later love.” And watched as her great wings took her off to her next appointment.

“She’s right you know.” Hob quickly whipped around at the sound of an unfamiliar voice in his now not so empty flat. Standing behind him was a young man with bright red hair-looking just like Destruction. Hob wet his lips, suddenly wishing he didn’t give Death his drink as the man changed forms into a wizen old man. He instinctively knew who was standing before him even though this was his first time meeting the being; and wondered if this had anything to do with the flat being on the border of the the Endless siblings realms.

The being-Time-circled around Hob, making him feel like a sculpture on display. He swallowed down his sudden feeling of inadequacy and smiled what he hoped was a welcoming grin. “Hel-,” he was cut off before he could finish the greeting.

“I suppose congratulations are in order.” His tone not giving anything away as he continued his perusal. Hob fought the urge to wipe his sudden sweat coated palms on his trousers, and instead met his father-in-laws eyes as he finally circled back to the front.

“I don’t like company, even from my own children, but I do keep an eye on them from time to time.” At the last part his lips twitch up, reminding Hob of Destiny when he managed to make him smile. His form shifted again, turning him into a small red headed child, though the intense look in his eyes didn’t change.

“I watched that day Death and Dream made that wager, and knew how important you’d be.” He stopped and stepped closer to Hob, his form shifting again to a baby, small tufts of red hair and a cherub face. Hob looked down and wondered how this didn’t even make it into his top ten list of weird things to happen to him in the last decade alone. “Imagine my surprise when the least likely timeline overwrote what the Fates had in store for Dream and changed Destiny’s Book.”

Hob swallowed, “uh-,” and once again was cut off from whatever he was about to say.

“Thank you.” The words were softly spoken as Time shifted again, his form now a middle again man with white streaking into his red hair and beard. He finally tore his eyes from Hob, who let out an inaudible sigh as the pressure he didn’t know was slowly suffocating the room disappeared.

When he looked back up, a shadow flashed over the man’s face making him look every eon he was. Hob blinked and the being was gone. As silence slowly descended he heard the knob on the door turning and Destruction emerged from the rain, red hair dripping and boots creating puddles in the entry way. He had shop bags in his great arms as he slowly looked a Hob’s gobsmacked face after shutting the door.

“You okay love?” He asked. He walked around Hob to deposit the bags onto the counter, but stopped and turned to face him again when he received no response. Setting the last bag down Destruction walked over to Hob and took his hands into his own larger ones.

That finally seemed to shock Hob out of his catatonic state. “I think your father approves of me.”

Destruction just stared at him as Hob let go of his hands and wandered the few paces to the kitchen counter to peak into the bags the redhead had left there. “What’s for dinner?” He asked unaware of the stunned expression his blasé response brought.

Needless to say, dinner was late after Destruction called his siblings and they all ended up talking over one another, save Destiny who sat on the couch with a small smile on his face as he read from his Book-Hob sitting beside him as he let his soothing presence help his now migraine- and handed him an aspirin and a glass of water.

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Sometimes when you clean your wip folder you find something you made years ago in a way to deal with and at the same time educate others on something very dear to you that's been stolen by people who see stealing it as "doing you a service"

Made this last year during Seachtain na Gaeilge

Anyway. Seeing this again made me think maybe it was alright, actually

Ní dhéanfaidh mé dearmad choíche. Ná bás an tseanteanga go deo

[ID: Digital art on a mid-tone grey background. The art features four maps of Ireland in a 2 by 2 formation. The first map is white and labelled ‘1800’, the second is red and labelled ‘1850’, the third is white and labelled ‘1926’, and the fourth is also white and labelled ‘2022’. The maps only show land where Irish is predominantly spoken, highlighting the decline in the use of Irish over the years, to the point where the 2022 map is completely unrecognisable as a map of Ireland, just looking like a few tiny scattered islands. There is white text above and below the maps. The text reads, in all capitals “If it wasn’t for us / you’d be speaking German”. /End ID]

[CÍ: Grafaic digiteach le cúlra liath. Tá ceithre léarscáileanna na hÉireann i dhá rónna ann. Is léarscáil bhán ó bhliain 1800 an chéad cheann, léarscáil dhearg ó bhliain 1850 an dara ceann, léarscáil bhán ó bhliain 1926 an tríú ceann, agus is léarscáil bhán ó bhliain 2022 an ceann deireanach. Ní thaispeánann na léarscáileanna ach na háiteanna le Gaeilge, agus tá an meath na Gaeilge soiléir, go háirithe leis an ceann deireanach. Ní aithneofá gur léarscáil na hÉireann í. Ina ionad sin, tá cuma cosúil cúpla oileánín scaipthe uirthi. Tá téacs bán taobh thuas agus taobh thíor den léarscáileanna. Tá “If it wasn’t for us / you’d be speaking German” [“Murach muid / bheadh sibh ag labhairt Gearmáinise”] scríofa i gceannlitreacha.]

I love the idea of lil fae Dream. If you ever feel inspired to write a Drabble of him, pls tag me 👀

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Ohhhh I love him? And his tiny little black hands and feet? And his little ruby wings??? Do think he deserves a little drabble <3

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Generally speaking, Hob was a man who did not put much stock in sobriety, other than when absolutely necessary.

That said, he had been fairly sure he was mostly sober, after one slowly-consumed pint this afternoon. His certainty about his level of impairment does come into question, though, at what he finds perched on the arm of his sofa.

"Dream?" he asks what is clearly some sort of hallucination. It looks like Dream.

If Dream was about one tenth of his usual height, had bright ruby wings that put Hob in mind of dragonflies of a size you just didn't see anymore, and was naked.

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miles and felicia have barely interacted in canon TO YOU. in my mind they are already at batman and robin levels of working together