those little guys on the side of the nerds boxes?????? i love them

i like them

boneless Yoshi

ancient egyptians be like

/gamerule keepInventory true

this is insanely funnier than my original post im so fucking mad

secondhand embarrassment is pure agony and i wish a lot of comedy didnt rely on it

I cannot deal with it. I have to literally leave the room.

It’s a sign of being extremely empathetic.

thanks! i hate it, how do i uninstall?

Even better, the comments to this Twitter post were an absolute FIRESTORM of mostly dudes explaining to her that dials can’t only have 2 positions (not true) and that it wasn’t a very good piece (not true) that she was being disrespectful to her teacher (don’t care) and that it was a sign of her stupidity/rabid feminism/intellectual laziness/misandry/etc. that she couldn’t see any “middle ground.” It became, in its way, a performance piece. I was absolutely mesmerised, even as I wished I could cock-punch people through the internet.

“Dials have more than one settimg” is the most hilarious response to this piece, because the implication of that statement is “just be a scootch more implicit in your own dehumanization. Not ALL the way. But like… a little more.”

sappho fragment 80 (l-p 126)

over two and a half millennia later and lesbians is the same

this is the best news i’ve heard in ages

Romeo bout to catch some cheeks

the scientists

i literally dont talk to anyone unless they talk to me first

NPC Energy

let’s abolish all clocks, the concept of time itself. live by sunlight. primal instincts and internal clocks ONLY

when is the next bus getting here? its a surprise :)

That’s no different from how buses already operate (:

I’m a slut for sitting in comfortable silence while both of us do our own thing and occasionally show each other something dumb on our computers like that’s the good shit my dude. 

What does this even mean

It means you McPress McF to McPay McRespects

Oh, the hero is a straight-laced, charismatic, conventionally handsome, neurotypical, heterosexual white man who trusts the government and lives in a bland, flavorless relationship with a subserviant, less-talented woman whose life revolves around him, and I WASN’T supposed to like the villain more? My bad

Any villain: I too once believed in the ruling power, but when I put my faith in it to protect me I was betrayed. The people who did this faced no consequences for their actions, faced no trial, and as we speak continue to do more harm to others. Your justice is a pretty plan in theory, hero, but it is naive- the real world is messy and cruel and unfair, and I plan to rectify that. Too long I have tried other ways to make this system work- it is time to make a change

Conventional Heroman: Killing people is wrong and the government probably had good plans for this death ray

this guy has the most difficult bird of all time but he loves him anyway

this mug i bought has a cat sitting at the bottom

goodbye kitty

I’M SO MAD

At 5 months old my son already has the best school photo ever

SHE did. Did anyone ELSE on that trip?

“dude i fucking love cops. like i LOVE cops” - tony turner timmy turner i mean

who is tony turner

i meant timmy turner

well you said tony

I’m gonna guess that they aren’t normally allowed to sit on the furniture.

Nothing is funnier than when Boomers make political cartoons that end up being accidentally hysterical. Case in point