I am a dragonlord, you cannot refuse me

when your stuffies fall off the bed D:

What the sneef? I'm snorfin' here!

Hey? You doin alright @ghost--bot ??

Neurotypicals will be like “I know you have a disability that affects your ability to stay organized, manage your time properly, socialize, or control what you’re able to think about or focus on, but that’s not an excuse to have trouble staying organized, managing your time properly, socializing, or controlling what you need to think about or focus on.” And then demand that they aren’t ableist. I’m tired.

good shit

i’m glad hannibal isn’t one of those “i eat people so they’re with me forever” dumb bitches, he’s just like

they’re called. th. they’re called responsibilities bechause theyh keep fucking respawnjng

I would like to note that contrary to popular belief, tuxedo cats are not little businessmen!

tuxedo is formal party attire, if you wore one at a business function, you would be inappropriately dressed!

tuxedo cats are, instead, lil fancy guys, darling socialites, even

Carefree gadabouts.

jolly good chaps

in possession of a good fortune

little Bertie Woosters, every one.

#in this metaphor their humans are the Jeeves#ah i see sir has caught himself in the windows blinds once again#very good sir

Links that open a new tab are like my dearest lover and friend. Links that stay within the same tab are my evilest most sworn enemy.

I fucking hate the hand that feeds me. I think I'll do something fucked up to it

i like to think that even if the batkids aren't blood related, they still have mannerisms they picked up from each other and bruce that makes people go "u guys are definitely related"

they all have dick's shit eating grin. they all do bruce's "hn" when tired or annoyed. they all have a flair for the dramatic. they all get super animated when talking about something that interests them. jason's glare? the other kids have an unsettling similar glare to it.

it's easy for some people to forget they aren't blood related because they're all just so clearly family.

Wayne Galas: exist

Fanfic writers: this setting can fit so many scenarios

First thing you see after you zoom in is how you die

How you dying 👀

More art of Ratigan and a reason why I shouldn't be a side character- 😩😩😩

OMG Kiri found The Great Mouse Detective and was ensnared by Rattigan! 😍

My mom had this cute, folksy way of saying, "I don't care if you die in a quarry, you miserable cretin," where I'd ask to go play somewhere dangerous, and she'd just smile and say, "If God wanted you, he would've taken you back by now." Hell of a woman. RIP.

She also had a tattoo of a unicorn, and every so often, she would put a little nail art crystal or some kind of gem where its eye was. Just super glue it directly to her skin. I don't know if this has anything to do with her whole "die in a quarry" deal, but we can't rule it out.

I didn’t know he was Jewish.

Mothltav

Is this a problem?

At a conveyer belt sushi restaurant.

The appropriate response.

here you guys can have it

this should be a tweet but I don’t want to deal with people on Twitter. everyone stop having every character in your fiction talk like their goal is to get an A in therapy. 

I love cathartic conversations too and that is why I am begging you: stop hunting them to extinction by making them constant, characterless, and corny as hell

all my fanfic is actually written ratatouille-style by this lizard