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@sanjipilled

“you are in my blood. i can’t help it. we can’t be anywhere except together.”

“If you promise to stay alive just a little bit longer I promise that we are going to make this world a place worth living in by any means necessary. I ain’t giving up. I swear.” 

Spotted in Clackamas, Oregon

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i just gotta get these proto-thoughts out of my head

did anyone else with an alcoholic parent see Donna and immediately go 'ah okay, that's why Carmy is like that'

Nat is the vessel for all of Donna's scorn and Carmy is the placater.

soothing a drunk person is hard and soothing an angry drunk is even harder. And Donna is angry. the bitter kind. like, she's angry at Carmy for leaving her but angrier at herself for being the kind of mother whose kids have a desperate need to escape from her.

man. watching Carmy in the kitchen with his mom fucking hurt. it's like he's running on auto-pilot and just trying to survive. trying to do everything he possibly can to just get himself and his mother through Christmas the only way he knows how.

it feels like he's balancing on tightrope and you almost watch him fall. you just know that the tension and stress and anxiety, all of it, came from a childhood of avoiding landmines. idk just watching him navigate it all was like, yep, heard, i get it.

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I sit with my grief. I mother it. I hold its small, hot hand. I don’t say, shhh. I don’t say, it is okay. I wait until it is done having feelings. Then we stand and we go wash the dishes.

Callista Buchen, from “Taking Care,” published in Thrush

Source: poems.com