i find it interesting how quickly we forgot about the political and specifically anti-war the emo movement actually was. 50% of emo bands first albums are explicitly about 9/11. they go on to address military service, ptsd, school shootings...

like it really wasnt so much “im sad bc sad” as “you have soiled our childhoods with violence and we will not allow you to ignore or forget it”

That they used their stage time to share messages of support and anti-violence, did their damndest to keep us alive, wrote songs about how much discrimination against people based on mental illness furthers the issue. Not to mention incredibly supportive of the LGBT+ community, especially for the time.

it’s annoying to see people wondering why emo is back again when the american president is once again a smugly idiotic criminal, the rest of the world seems to be cheerfully dissolving into fascist regimes along with us, and the potential threat of nuclear apocalypse presents a spicy alternative to the guaranteed ruin of global warming, while all the guys in charge are doing about it is getting rich fast off our misery

it’s like i’m fourteen again except this time all my joints hurt. if gen z wants to tear shit up, have stupid hair, and listen to gerard way, i’m all for it. 

also I learned about this project called “queering the map.” the idea is that in the past gay neighborhoods and gay spaces were very clearly defined bc it just wasn’t safe to be yourself anywhere else. as lgbt+ people become more visible and accepted many feel that we are losing our connection to those spaces

so every dot on this map is basically someone’s queer experience: coming out, meeting their future wife, seeing another gay man in public for the first time, anything you can think of that truly left a mark on them

it started in Montreal and is primarily English-language with most pins dropped in the US, Canada, and Europe, but there are people all over the world who’ve shared their experiences. it’s great to look at places near you but it’s also great to see that even people in places you thought were the middle of nowhere are happy with themselves and finding community and living their lives

It’s here and it’s SO SWEET?? Just clicking around it’s very personal stories, in first person and a lot of them addressed to a specific “you”, and sooo many in extremely poetic language. It feels like an art installation and it’s so beautiful. ;W; Thanks for sharing!!!

… there’s also a lot of really silly ones (like gay sharks in the middle of the ocean)

I looked at Jerusalem and immediately found two favorites for entirely different reasons.

Things I found from the queer community of japan:

It’s no secret to the Japanese that Shinjuku nichome is the gay district of Tokyo but about half the pins left there are for the same club in that area named gold finger. Definitely a place to check out if you’re looking to get involved in the Japanese queer community for whatever reason, it seems.

I have a sneaking suspicion this submission is a haiku when written in Japanese…

This guy got the scenic view I guess

Is this how people feel while reading deep romantic poetry because wow I’m moved.

Honestly the best feeling is learning we’re not as alone as we’ve been led to believe

These are all super poetic oml I appreciate every single one of them

There are none in my town. Guess I’ll be the first

I went to my old, STAUNCHLY conservative town and saw “There are a lot more of us here than most would think, past and present” and I nearly cried

small town australia vibes

oceania gays are funny bitches

With what’s happening in Poland, it’s super important for us queer folks to be able to find each other and take strength from the community. I’ve always loved queering the map and I thank whoever created it every day.

We are everywhere! 💖

I personally added a few of my favorite personal stories.

Pros of having ADHD:

Cons of having ADHD:

born in the wrong generation

y’all really have to stop implying all non-binary people are afab in your posts. you need to stop implying that all non-binary people with flat chests are viewed as “androgynous” and not just afab people. y’all need to start including amab trans people in your politics, especially transfeminine nb people.

Bishop Curry V may be young (10 years old, to be precise), but the little kid from Texas has some big ideas. He’s currently working on a device that could help prevent children from dying in hot cars.

Bishop was inspired to create a device he calls “Oasis,” which would attach to a car seat and detect if a child is left inside the vehicle, prompting it to blow cool air until parents or the police are notified.

“It would be a dream to have lots of inventions that would save many lives,” the precocious 10-year-old told the news station.

source

A lot of people don’t realize how easy it is to leave something in a hot car. It’s easy to forget something when it’s not in your daily routine, especially if it’s asleep or under a blanket or something. This is a nightmare. I don’t have kids myself, but I can absolutely understand how this could happen- everyone’s sick so you’re probably kind of out of it, you run in thinking you’re just going to be a minute, get distracted with the task at hand… and then your child dies in a horrific way because of it…

I’m all for any methods or technologies that can help prevent it from turning tragic.

#BlackPride #BlackInventors 

THIS IS LITERALLY THE BEST WAY TO WAKE UP holy shit I am so proud of this child I wanna give them a huge hug

His GoFundMe is here: https://www.gofundme.com/endhotcardeaths

He only has raised $2,950 as of 2/2/17

Let’s boost the hell out of this

Hey.

I know you’re struggling right now.

I know you’re suffering.

I know people have been cruel to you. I know how your chest has ached with misery, and I know endless the nights have been when you could not find the escape of sleep. I know how many tears you’ve cried, how fiercely you’ve hated yourself, how soul-destroyingly empty the days have felt as they’ve plodded on.

I know. I see you.

You are not invisible. You are worthy of love, and I love you. Don’t worry, I have lots of room in my heart for everyone who reads this. :)

I am so sorry for what you’ve had to go through. You deserved better. You still do.

I hope you rest easy–if not tonight, then maybe the next. I hope you discover somewhere or something or someone who brings you peace. I hope you find a way to carve out your own little corner of restful solitude in the world.

Most of all, I hope you feel loved and seen and understood. Even if it’s just for this moment.

You are so lovely and so wonderful. Be well.

Gender Troubles: The Butches

As encapsulated so perfectly in Alison Bechdel’s ‘Fun Home’:

As a butch woman who was once a wee butch girl, I can attest to the sheer power of this.

Sounds about white

y’all, the racist restaurants are outing themselves and you’re really going to give them shit about it?  this is a perfect list of establishments to run into the ground, and they’re handing it to you free of charge.

conversely, if a space is marked “unsafe” on the app, you know it IS safe for anyone with common human decency and can be happy with your dining experience knowing you will be protected by staff and other patrons if a MAGAsshole wanders into your midst.

reminder that this blog, while not politically focused, supports BLM. bootlickers and racists aren’t welcome here, and never will be.

gentle reminder: you’re not weak for feeling unable to cope with something. you’re not weak for being overwhelmed. you’re not weak for needing extra time. we usually don’t show these emotions to others so it’s hard to see, but you’re not alone in feeling the way you do. we can get better together.

I think a fun thing would be if we simply didn't have access to information regarding famous people's personal lives and relationships. Like i just think that would be fun and productive for us. We could focus on other stuff, like our own personal lives and relationships. I think that'd be neat.

I'd love to go to a movie and watch some employees do their jobs for 2 hours and then leave, satisfied in knowing jack shit abt all of them outside the parameters of a movie screen.

Imagine living life free of the constant bombardment of what grocery store celebrities shop at and who walks home from whose apartment in a backwards shirt at 5am. And then one day whilst perusing a book store, you notice a newly released memoir by an actress you liked in multiple roles. And each page is a delight because you hadn't previously known about any of it and it's well written, and because she only wrote what she was comfortable sharing, so the transaction of information is entirely consensual.

Help your friendly neighborhood milf not go homeless!

Hey so never thought I’d ever have to make one of these but uh yeah my landlady is not happy that my baby exists in an area that I pay a fucking premium for :^))

So yeah Dante Markus hasn’t even been alive for two months yet and we’re facing eviction in the middle of a pandemic!! And because we’re in the middle of a pandemic trying to find a rental is not exactly cost effective

I’m already paying 1300 a month and am pulling that outa my ass so I’m not sure where I’m supposed to find money for anything else I’m freaking the duck out and I’m really not sure what to do especially right now.

I had a pretty sever hemorrhage post birth and am just now finally healing so I can’t even go back to work yet like I’m so cucked I fucking thought shit would work out for once but fuck me i guess.

I know money’s tight for everyone but if you have anything to spare I’d be eternally greatful but if you don’t I get it

paypal.me/GMeidlinger

Marriage is good and weddings are great but I hate modern wedding culture. You don’t need to bankrupt yourself to have a nice wedding. Stop supporting the wedding industry, stop buying outrageously priced engagement rings, stop spending 10k on a dress you’ll only ever wear once.

Coming from a professional event planner - weddings are egregiously expensive because companies openly raise prices at the word “wedding.” 

Pro Tip - Never drop the word wedding while planning if you don’t need to. Most things can be for “an event you’re planning.” This obviously doesn’t include things like the venue, DJ (who needs specific wedding songs), and the wedding dress company if you’re going that route versus just buying a dress.

For my wedding I got “discounted” cupcakes, flowers, decor, bridesmaids dresses, groomsman attire, and invitations. I did this by either searching for things that aren’t marketed for weddings or not telling the companies I was working with it was for a wedding. Because honestly, most of the time they don’t need to know why you’re ordering.

These companies target people planning their weddings and markup everything the second “wedding” is said. And it’s said often because people assume the services change exponentially for weddings. They absolutely do not. 

The best example are the cupcakes I had for my wedding. I used a designer cupcake store in town instead of spending $1000 on a wedding cake. If you place a large order of cupcakes with a cake tree for display - it costs about $150 for 100 (which is what I did). When you order their “wedding” package - the price raised to a $700 base for 100 cupcakes. The only other perk includes a “tasting.” Forget that. Our tasting was buying a few cupcakes in flavors we thought we’d like and picked three. It cost maybe $20. 

What these companies do is scummy and targets people who don’t have information about the event industry.

I will yell it from the rooftops until people realize there’s a better way.

just be aware, the reason places raise their rates for weddings

is because of all the cultural hype around weddings

and how people are now conditioned to be fucking insane about weddings

I work with photographers, I’ve shot weddings as a photographer, it is one hundred thousand times worse and higher-stress than any single other kind of event you can photograph, and believe me people are always shitty to photographers but weddings? fucking bonkers

I also do flowers. Mostly I do boring cheap-n-cheerful posies and bouquets to sell at the farmer’s market but we’ve done some weddings and oh my god no. That is so high-stress. Never even had a bad experience at one of those but we now only do DIY buckets– make yr own flower arrangements, here’s some buckets full of flowers and a handout of tips on how to make it nice, have at it and return our buckets if you remember to, thanks, bye. Not getting any closer than that!

If you are not telling the service that you’re having a wedding, then don’t act like it’s a wedding, don’t make four fucktillion custom substitutions, don’t demand all kinds of extra shit (it can’t be BLUE it has to be CERULEAN! I don’t want CRAB it has to be LOBSTER. The tablecloths have to be IRONED. I need ROSES not CARNATIONS), don’t be a fucking bridezilla. (Worse, don’t be a momzilla-of-the-bride, or whatever horrible relative who needs to impose their expectations and their vision on an event that’s not about them in any fucking way. Oh my god.)

So yeah, if you can be chill, have a chill wedding.

If you can’t be chill then those places have that markup for a fucking reason and they have earned every goddamned penny of it. If the words MY SPECIAL DAYYYYYY ever come out of your fucking mouth then you had BETTER be paying that fucking wedding surcharge.

Don’t be like this. My sister had a “family reunion” in a white dress and got very reasonable rates from the catering place, and acted perfectly normal to them, and it worked out fine.

Don’t order the standard package and then freak out when it doesn’t look like what you saw on a TV show once.

Am I a bitter old hag whose withered hand nobody’s ever taken in marriage? Sure. I’m also not in fucking debt over a party.

I worked in a bakery for a while and we would charge around 450 dollars for a 90 dollar cake once it was a “wedding” cake. If I was lucky enough to take the order without my manager around I would always tell the bride and groom to come back and order it the next day and just tell them it was for a family reunion or something.

Seriously, NEVER tell the person you’re ordering it from that it’s for a wedding. Even if they’re like me and they hate doing it, often times I would have to charge the wedding price if my manager was around or I would get called into the office and berated for undercharging the customer and losing us several hundred dollars on the order.

Also if the bakery where you get the cake has a catalogue of options to look through, avoid the wedding cake section like the plague! We use the exact same ingredients that we do in a normal cake and normally you can still find a beautiful design not listed under “wedding” that will work just as well for you. Or instead of going through the catalogue, talk to your baker and describe what you want but be sure to tell them it’s for a family reunion - not wedding or anniversary.

Also never buy your cake topper from a bakery either. They’re grossly marked up. Order it online.

It’s absolutely horrible how much companies look to profit off your happiness.

my spicy take of the day is generic medication brands shouldnt exist. the name brand medications should be price capped every single time. I don’t care.

these name brand medications are not always identical to the generic and many of those inactive ingredients only present in name brand make a huge difference.

we shouldnt have to create a shittier version of a medication that works. the medication that works should be the one readily availible to everyone. pretending generics are just as good /every time/ ignores that this practice shouldnt fucking exist in the first place.

for a few examples:

i am allergic to the offbrand benadryls, i dont know why or how but i am, yet they are less than 1/3rd of the price which puts me in a terrible position.

many generic insulins end up killing people because they are not made the same as brands people get used to and this isnt readily apparent when they turn to the cheaper brands in a pinch.

these cheaper and worse quality medications are a tier of waste that should not exist. poor people should not be subject to worse healthcare and these companies do not need more money.

medicine shouldnt be a capitalist endeavor at all im sick of everyone pretending this is an acceptable practice.

if you think it’s fair that capitalists price poor people out of the ability to get good quality medications so capitalists can make more money i dont think you have disabled people like me in your best interest.

generic brands create a false sense of security that pretends everyone is getting the same care when they actually arent getting the same care.

these name brands should instead be forced down to a reasonable price and covered by a true healthcare system.

even healthcare systems will seek out a generic over the namebrand which isnt always equal or good which many doctors already know.

eliminate the ability to create a generic and force these companies to comply with reality. force their prices low or you do not seek equal care for all.