Almost made it a year since I last bunt myself, probably not going to do it tonight

But I'm sad again.

Feeling worthless and pointless again

Nothing to distract myself with that doesn't remind me that I'm not good enough

Can't get enthusiastic enough to start anything new

No point in getting drunk, never really done it, probably won't help anyway

Burning myself again will just cause more prolems

Normal people aren't like this, hell weird people aren't like this

I know I'll be fine, something shiny will pop up and I'll obsess over that til the next shiny thing

But right now I'm just tired of being broken

Wow, I'm broken. Never put that together before

What's the use of anything.

I dislike my face.

I've disliked my face for decades.

I wish I knew how to fix/deal with it.

I mask constantly outside the house, I want to wear glasses and a beanie so my entire head is covered.

Maybe I should learn eye make-up.

Randomly Sad

Well not entirely, I have a fair idea why I'm sad. I'm just not 100% on why its making me sad.

Disconnect between who I want someone to be versus who they are I guess.

Adventures are less fun when you dont have company

I was playing Splatoon 2 tonight and saw someone advertising a clan

And I thought "hey, heres a chance to find some people to play with"

But then it involved a tryout process and regular interactions with the group, and since I'm beyond rubbish at socialising I backed out immediately.

So I feel sad and disappointed now.

I'm going to harass my partner for cuddles.

Its the weirdest thing, I've been a Sailor Moon fan for years, but since I had never watched the series properly I was always hesitant to say I was a fan, especially since all I had seen is some half remembered episodes from tv in the mid 90's and Sailor Moon Abridged

And now I'm finally watching the new dub and just finished the first season, and holy fuck its so much better then I remember/was expecting.

That said I realise that my memories and the Abridged were informed by the horrible 90's english translation.

My pile of Milky Way's that my partner doesn't know I have 😈

I'm round and squishy and thankfully I manage to be pretty ok with that most of the time.

Girlfriend brought home cardboard cutouts, now I'm going to put them around to scare her

We'll see if it works

First post, as anyone knows.