“Amanda’s first trap doesn’t make sense because she didn’t have to hurt herself to get out of it” yes girlypop Amanda was so far gone having to hurt herself would have done nothing and taught her nothing. Her automatic reaction is to hurt herself whether it be through drug abuse or sh. It was only by having to harm another human being that she learned anything or recognized that she didn’t want her life to end, but it was also having to kill someone else to live that doomed her to ultimately fail her last test and die. She is still so haunted by her actions and belief that she didn’t deserve to survive the trap that she makes her traps unwinnable, because if she didn’t deserve to survive then no one does. If she didn’t emerge from her trap reborn and made new like jigsaw wants her to believe then no one will. While she wants so badly to believe that people are inherently good, jigsaw tells her they are not good until they have survived a trap. And yet she survived both of hers and here she is, still not good. Still not fixed. And it’s her misguided attempts to follow jigsaw who she does not really believe in that ultimately ends in her death, because she can’t find it within herself to trust him one last time, having seen herself that his philosophy is wrong, but she also does not want to lose the only thing she has left to believe in. John tells her not to kill lynn, but the letter says to kill lynn so that john doesn’t disown her, and having something that she doesn’t believe in but that gives her a sense of security and care is so much better than being alone with her thoughts and actions