Y e e t

Remember that the right person will never get tired of you even in the worst times

No, they will! But they'll work through it, or walk away for a bit (i'm talking minutes to hours) and then come back.

People can love you and still need to get away from you for a bit. And there is nothing toxic about that — it's good, in fact. It helps remind everyone involved that everyone has boundaries, and everyone needs time to themselves.

It's okay. Calm down before you talk about something that made you angry while your loved one is sick. Be sure of what made you mad so you can discuss it together.

Love isn't a one-way street, and it's something that takes work. Part of that work is knowing when you need to step away.

Self Care Tips From Tumblr: When you feel like everyone hates you, sleep. When you feel like you hate everyone, eat. When you feel like you hate yourself, shower. Someone out there feels better because you exist. 

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When you see something sensible; Reblog it. :)

We have GOT to stop being assholes to people with receding and balding hairlines. There's not a single person that it can't affect. It affects trans men, particularly on hormones, it affects trans women, particularly those not on hormones, it affects people with endocrine issues, something that's becoming more prevalent and common, and it can affect people without a particular cause, including cis women. It's a normal part of being human and we NEED to stop dehumanizing and humiliating ppl for it

My bf started losing his hair in his early 20s and the effect it's had on him is devastating.

He's an actor and he was dropped by his agent after he stopped hiding his hair loss. The roles he was cast in narrowed and shifted from more heroic characters to villains, and eventually he became so miserable about it that he stopped going to auditions altogether.

He used to enjoy dyeing his hair bright colours, and he lost that means of self expression. It alienated him from his own appearance, which knocked him back in coming out and exploring his queerness. The way he talks about it often feels dysmorphic. He says shaving makes him feel like he's "rotting" - like he's "scraping the mold off [his] head".

I've seen drunk people and teenagers yell at him in the street and mock his baldness. I've seen people come up to him and slap his head or touch it without asking for permission. I've witnessed this behaviour from other trans people and women who I know would absolutely kick off if he took such a degrading or entitled attitude towards a part of their body, but seem to think it's OK to do it to him.

Since going bald people perceive him as more masculine. He feels people are more suspicious of him. Women are less likely to approach him. Folks are quicker to put him in a box or misread his behaviour as aggressive or threatening, when the reality is that he's neurodivergent and can't conform to rigid social norms.

Baldness is a heavily gendered characteristic. If someone is conventionally masculine enough and/or is protected by other intersecting powers and privileges (eg wealth) then baldness can reinforce their maleness and the harm to their social standing is minimised. But if their performance of maleness is complicated by something like queerness or disability, it creates a dissonance. They have what is perceived as a hypermasculine trait standing in sharp contrast with their refusal/failure to perform normative, idealised masculinity.

And that's how baldness is typically read - as failure. Especially when it exists outside of wealthy, successful, heterosexual masculinity but tbh even there too - just look at all the jokes about Jeff Bezos' baldness or Elon Musk getting hair plugs. It's similar to insulting Trump over his weight. Like yeah fuck those guys but all you're really doing is revealing to the fat and bald people in your life that you think their bodies are deserving of mockery.

And God help you if you're a bald woman. All women with receding hairlines are at a huge risk from transmisogyny.

Sorry for the essay. Baldness is absolutely a body neutrality issue. It's an ageism issue, and a trans issue, and I WISH there was a broader recognition of this.

AITA for realizing that my best friend is actually a ghost and not telling him because i'm worried that if he realizes he's dead he'll finally be able to accept it and fully pass on and i won't be able to hang out with him anymore?

AITA if i've been dead for a while but haven't told my best friend yet because he doesn't seem to have realized i'm a ghost and if he does i'm worried that he'll finally be able to accept it and let me go and i can't bear the thought of losing him?

AITA for killing that guy

Carmen Maria Machado in Queer for Fear: A History of Queer Horror

im not saying we should resort to violence. however.

I feel like a good shorthand for a lot of economics arguments is "if you want people to work minimum wage jobs in your city, you need to allow minimum wage apartments for them to live in."

"These jobs are just for teenagers on the weekends." Okay, so you'll use minimum wage services only on the weekends and after school. No McDonald's or Starbucks on your lunch break.

"They can get a roommate." For a one bedroom? A roommate for a one bedroom? Or a studio? Do you have a roommate to get a middle-wage apartment for your middle-wage job? No? Why should they?

"They can live farther from city center and just commute." Are there ways for them to commute that don't equate to that rent? Living in an outer borough might work in NYC, where public transport is a flat rate, but a city in Texas requires a car. Does the money saved in rent equal the money spent on the car loan, the insurance, the gas? Remember, if you want people to take the bus or a bike, the bus needs to be reliable and the bike lanes survivable.

If you want minimum wage workers to be around for you to rely on, then those minimum wage workers need a place to stay.

You either raise the minimum wage, or you drop the rent. There's only so long you can keep rents high and wages low before your workforce leaves for cheaper pastures.

"Nobody wants to work anymore" doesn't hold water if the reason nobody applies is because the commute is impossible at the wage you provide.

This was so interesting I love yuval

"English is the universal language for a reason"

"I agree" with the British Empire Wikipedia page open had me rolling

Yes!

Also: “Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo” is a grammatically correct sentence in English.

this is similar to the thing where people will joke about how they're white/Americans so they "have no culture"

in that it's *intended* to be a sort of self-neg that compliments other cultures, but in actuality it's just a subtle form of racism where you view your own culture as neutral or default

Hey hot new typing quirk dropped

i dont know what this means but it has to mean something.

“Where you been all day?”

“Fishin”

Women may want you but the fish refuse to live in fear anymore.

What kind of fight do you bring this to

the default way for things to taste is good. we know this because "tasty" means something tastes good. conversely, from the words "smelly" and "noisy" we can conclude that the default way for things to smell and sound is bad. interestingly there are no corresponding adjectives for the senses of sight and touch. the inescapable conclusion is that the most ordinary object possible is invisible and intangible, produces a hideous cacophony, smells terrible, but tastes delicious. and yet this description matches no object or phenomenon known to science or human experience. so what the fuck

this is what ancient greek philosophy is like

This seems like a touchy subject for OP

Anyway I'll never forget that 22 hour bus ride to Alabama to help my friend get married and one of the legs of the journey I was on the bus with my (clearly labelled, well behaved) service dog at my side and people were throwing a huge stink about the fact that I had my dog and then this ancient dude in a wheelchair, double amputee both legs, pipes up and tells them to shut the fuck up and leave me alone because Creed was obviously trained and then once everyone quieted down and I was able to take a seat, asked me quietly if I was okay.

He also could have been a cartoon character because I could have sworn there were little winged hearts floating above his head as he told me he'd always liked dogs but of course now he's old and can't walk so he can't get one anymore but he could tell how much Creed loved me and I him etc etc

He never asked me once what my disability was. He spoke up for me when he didn't have to. A truly old white man in Georgia saw a young black person with a "dangerous dog" breed and spoke up in my defense.

If you want to claim to be a disability advocate, that means you kind of have to. Advocate for each other. For the next 4 or so hours, this man and I had each other's backs. Two disabled people on a Greyhound filled with ableist passengers who were not happy we couldn't exist somewhere they didn't havr to accomodate. It didn't matter what our pasts or our diagnoses were. We were stronger together, so that's what we stayed. Together.

Two people banded together and the rest of the bus shut their mouths. Imagine what we could do with more of us.

This reminds me of that time I was on the bus (an hour-long bus trip at 5 o'clock where everyone was coming from the city back to town, tired and overworked) and the bus arrived at a bus stop where there was a young adult woman in a wheelchair. She also seemed to have other disabilities regarding sight.

The buses in Madrid are old now and it takes like 8 whole minutes to set up the ramp, then 5 more to pull in the ramp. A few people sighed as the process began.

Then the ramp got stuck.

Fifteen minutes waiting, and I'm near the back door watching this poor disabled girl become more and more stressed and panicky as the ramp just would not come out. People were groaning, checking their clocks, looking angry.

And then, in plain view of everyone in the bus, she began to shake her head at the tired driver and went, "No, no! I'll take the next!"

Y'know. The next bus. At prime hour 6 o'clock. Which would probably be full already.

So this guy in a full suit and this other guy who looked like a cartoon of a high school pothead came out of the bus and went, "Is it okay if we pick you up? If it is - tell us how to do it, we don't want to break your wheelchair or cause you ANY harm."

I quickly stood along with this old lady and we made sure she had space for her big wheelchair (it was a fancy one! Big and bulky, so we had to move some bags and people actually decided to stand so the bags wouldn't be on the lil hallway).

The girl was saying it was okay at first but when the guys insisted, she directed the two men on how to grab it and actually asked for two more people in case. I came down and this other young guy came, too. It wasn't a big gap but you can never know.

Anyway, we were able to get her inside the bus and since I was close to the door, she and I and the older woman had a bit of a chat on the way. She was very nice and a little overwhelmed because she said people in this city don't usually help her out.

When her stop arrived, different people immediately moved to help her, checking that everything was okay. One of them even gave her his phone number in case anything on her chair broke or was strained, said he was well-paid enough to lose a couple hundreds to help.

THAT is what I feel needs to happen.

And also Madrid fix you FUCKING busses.

lol you're only learning japanese because you like anime, you're only interested in history because you like the anime girl king king arthur series, you're only broadening your horizons and becoming a more learned and fulfilled person because your sincere enjoyment of something not considered intellectual enough to be worthy of recognition provided you with a small window into a few of the many wonders of culture and knowledge the world has to offer and you want to obtain a deeper understanding of them

you’re twelve years old and you break your father’s hand when he hi-fives you. the first thing you learn is that the smallest slip up can hurt the people you love. your (foster) father smiles and says it’s okay (it’s not). 

your parents are not your parents. the idyllic farming community that raised you is not your home. you’re a You-Don’t-Know-What from You-Don’t-Know-Where. all you know for sure is that you’re not human. 

so you can fly. so you can run fast. so you can lift cars. so what? why do you even have this power? what should you even do with it? 

your father said do what’s right, so that’s what you do. 

you stop a robbery. the man’s knife shatters against your skin and you see the same fear in his eyes that you saw in your father’s when you were twelve. you catch a falling child before it can hit the water. his mother looks at you like you’re a god. 

they love you, even though they don’t know you. the most powerful man in the world hates you because they love you. 

you wanted to write when you were younger. you wanted to tell stories that needed to be told. you never wanted to star in them. you never wanted super-geniuses and demi-goddesses looking to you for advice; like you have any idea how to handle threats to reality itself. you’re just a kid from smallville who’s trying to do the best he can with what he’s given. 

you try and get back to the farm as much as you can. it feels normal being back among the open wheat; where everyone smiles because you’re that nice Kent boy. 

when you were younger, you pretended to fly, hands out to your sides and running through the tall grass by the river. it doesn’t look as beautiful from on high; the details get lost and the colors of your hometown blur together from a mile above ground. 

the problem with flying is that it puts you so far above people you care about

“oh but Superman is such a boring c-“ shut up shut up shut up forever.

One of the keys to Bruce and Clark’s friendship is Bruce going ‘powers shmowers you think your godlike strength makes you infallible and above people? You’re just some dude in a cape. Who’s an idiot.’

Clark: Oh thank God. This guy gets it.

Bruce *expecting arrogance*: wait what

Clark: yesterday I accidentally locked myself out of my apartment in my underwear trying to get the mail and I forgot I could just break the door open. I stood there for an hour waiting for the locksmith to open before I remembered.

Bruce:….

Clark: I’M AN IDIOT OK, I’m just a guy, I have no idea what I’m doing

Bruce: I hate how endearing this is. Stop making me like you

Clark: if I get my mom to make you lemon squares will you teach me how to pick a lock

Bruce: I SAID STOP

why do people in dnd each occupy a 5ft by 5ft square, how far apart do you think people need to be? why are dnd minis afraid of touching

dnd minis standing five feet apart in a dungeon cuz they’re not gay

look, if the guy to my left has to do the turbo-macarena while charging a bolt of flesh melting while the guy on my right is doing every bruce lee move at the same time and the guy in front of me is flourishing a broadaxe like hes doing yo-yo tricks im going to give each of them enough floorspace to not liquefy myself

fuck a “personal bubble”, stay out of my

BLOOD CIRCLE

So glad that non-scouts can appreciate the term blood circle properly.

i have three responses to "how is your writing going"

1) it's not

2) it's going

3) i am ENTHUSED. i have been BLESSED with the POWER of the MUSES. i am an UNSTOPPABLE FORCE OF CREATION i am the MOST ULTIMATE OF ALL WRITERS

Pie chart showing the proportion of time each answer is used:

As someone who took etiquette lessons, politeness is an incredibly effective tool for disarming bigots. You can either force them to reconsider their words/actions by directly and calmly confronting their behavior (by using the rules of society in your favor), or you can dip entirely while they appear to be in the wrong.

Both options are great.

Because the thing is, when bigots pick fights, they are 100% counting on you to get louder than them. Or meaner. They want you to react emotionally and provide fodder for their 'You're Too Emotionally Immature To Understand' cannon.

What they aren't expecting you to do is say one of the following phrases in a polite, concerned tone:

For those of you who'd are spiteful and/or dealing with Fundamentalists/Evangelicals/generally shitty Christians:

And my all time favorite:

"It sounds to me like there are some seriously dark and angry forces at work in your heart."

(Nothing stops a Christian bigot in their tracks faster than implying the Devil is causing their bigotry. But you MUST be calm, polite, and gentle with your tone and wording. It is absolutely fair to twist the rules and play them at their own game, but you gotta play hard.)

TLDR: It's much faster to use etiquette, politeness, and rhetoric reversal when eviscerating idiots online and in person, because they aren't expecting you to weaponize their behaviors back in their direction. Don't get angry, get spitefully polite! :)

I once witnessed a very soft-spoken young Southern man take a hateful older woman’s hands gently in his and say “Sister, I am so sorry that the Devil has carved a home for hatred in your heart. I’ll pray for you.”

It was glorious.

This works with all sorts of inappropriate behavior. I work as the archivist in a public library, so I end up on the reference desk a lot, and sometimes patrons will say or do things that aren't exactly appropriate. When patrons try to hit on me, I put on a teacher voice and calmly ask, "Is that an appropriate question to ask someone at work?" and it shuts them down immediately.

This sort of thing always does the trick.

Spellcasters hate this fact but if you just stick your fingers in their mouth while they're casting a spell with a verbal component it's literally more effective than a counter spell.

This also works with pinning their hands against the wall when they're trying to use somnatic components.

Basically if you make out sloppy style while pressed against a wall the spellcasters can't do anything

fanart companion to "he would not fucking say that." he does not fucking look like that

I spent so much of my life romanticizing the Great and Powerful Enormity of the Sea, reading about the salt and the sweat of the sailors straining to haul the sails or anchor while dreading the monsters in the cold, icy deep fathoms below…and now you tell me that a fathom is only 6 feet deep -

Six feet is still more than enough for a grave.

Hi, that is the most metal addition you could have possibly made to this post