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A Tumblr for Runzi

@runzi333 / runzi333.tumblr.com

Just a blog filled with the random ranting of a silly three tailed fox.

The best part is the fact that out of the two of them Martha Stewart was the one who went to prison.

Wait…what?

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Wiiiiild. He did commit murder (in self defense - no judging) and America‘s Best Housewife was sent to jail because of insider trading, securities fraud, obstruction of justice and conspiracy. This is wiiiiiild 😄😄😄

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also he has every right to make fun of kanye west considering snoop has had a successful career for about two decades including his own cookbook and appearing in movies whereas kanye is a flat earther who had to crowdfund another album because he ran out of money despite kim kardashian being with him, not having the money to produce another album should be the metric when you know you can tell a musician has failed somewhere in either money management or actually being a musician rather then a famous trainwreck

snoop dogg is a good man who loves cooking, nature, and supporting the dreams of young children in poverty. kanye west helped get trump elected.

seriously though check out his cookbook its beautiful

and filled with lgiht humor, legit cooking, and charming life stories

Whenever I think about snoop I remember that episode of cribs where he lived in an unusually modest house compared to everyone else on that show, spent the entire time with his young daughter hugging onto his leg and dragging her around as he walked. He even talked about how he didn’t want his kids to be musicians and that he just wants them to have a chance at a normal life / he doesn’t wish music career drama on anyone

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The dude is mega down to earth for having a networth of 135 million dollars and staying relevant for longer than some of the top charting musicians have been alive

he says he keeps a supply of poptarts in the house for his nieces/nephews and grandkids but admits theyre really for him and then goes on to discuss what selection of condiments your fridge should have to jazz up leftover takeout hes one of the most thoroughly human humans ive ever known of

Doesn’t he also coach football for kids, and stops smoking during the season to set a good example for the kids?

all these people going on about how Hozier is the peak representation of musical soft masculinity when Snoop has been out here rocking the smoothest braids and most hype manicures for decades

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Have you seen his Planet Earth voiceover video? It’s the best thing I’ve ever heard. Man knows nothing about otters

Plizzanet Earth is a joy. Here’s the playlist:

Why has no one ever told me about Plizzanet Earth oh my god

Snoop is legit; don’t come for him. 

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He also did an episode of Storybots and my kids adore the computer man. Which is wild to me. Cuz I remember gangster rap Snoop. And we love and support Snoop in this house.

Love him, great man

plizzanet earth

Hozier is the peak of good white masculinity. Snoop is the peak of good Black masculinity, and on top of what Hozier does, Snoop adds something a lot of Black children never get to see—you can be a man, you can have “cred,” you can be cool, and also know how to make cookies. (Hozier is great, but he’s never been cool a day in his life and he freely admits this. The two of them have very different kinds of good masculinity both culturally and personally.)

There’s this idea—and the tweet opening this thread exemplifies it—that being “gangsta” means being self-absorbed, materialistic, and violent. Snoop is just like “nah, I have bling and street talk and I’m higher than a kite and also I love my kids and cooking and FUCK your toxic masculinity,” and that’s an important message. You can have the look, if you like the look, but you don’t have to be a stereotype to have the look.

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PLIZZANET EARTH IS THE BEST THING OH MY GOD

no cropped boomer meme will ever make me laugh harder than he just sold rice

He just sold rice

“women don’t know how much rejection hurts” i wasn’t allowed to play with legos or touch a football or look at sports. i wasn’t allowed to eat more. i wasn’t allowed to talk loudly, to laugh too much, to inject myself into male conversations. i wasn’t allowed to be good at science. i was told “oh sweetheart, have another college in mind, STEM fields are hard.” i got turned down from jobs in favor of boys where were less qualified. one boss told me he was hesitant to hire me because my last name is hispanic and i’m pretty and he didn’t want the “controversy.” i couldn’t take up space on the train. i would be talked over in public places. i couldn’t eat steak or drink beer, they were “boy” things. video games were off limits, i wasn’t allowed to ask if i could see more characters like myself in them. super heroes were all men, women were just love interests. i wanted shirts with wonderwoman, with black widow, with harley quinn, i found next to nothing. i wanted pockets and colors other than pink and clothes designed for warmth, not sexy, i got nothing. women change their name to be published nationally. i wasn’t allowed to be emotional, i wasn’t good at driving, i wasn’t in charge of my own body. i wasn’t allowed to show off my body, i wasn’t allowed to dress modestly. i had to be pretty, whatever it took, but my eating was constantly made fun of. “she’s, like, anorexic” was a punchline, not a disorder. “she’s fat” was a death sentence. 

boys said no because: i wasn’t pretty i wasn’t small i was too loud i spent too much energy on being funny on because i wouldn’t shut up what a feminazi i wasn’t smart i was too smart for my own good i was always reading i was always busy i was too needy i was too independent i was not who you took home i was too much of a house mom i was perfect and it was scary.

women don’t know. women don’t know. never sat in a room and wrote angsty poetry about this shit. somehow both overemotional and not capable of knowing how much rejection stings. which one is it. which one is it. i’ll give you a hint: we’ve been rejected since the first time our parents said, “no, not the blue blanket, it’s for little boys to play with.” we are used to having “no” slammed in our faces. we got used to it. maybe the reason it seems so unnatural to hear “no” is because for your entire life, you heard “yes.”

“Maybe the reason it seems so unnatural to hear ‘no’ is because for your entire life, you heard ‘yes’.”

I can’t stop laughing because…

like I don’t know how you can get more obvious than tweeting “I’m sure I’m bisexual,” but clearly The Sun isn’t convinced

tbt to the time a bi woman explicitly said she was sure she was bisexual and “journalists” were like

I mean, it’s a thing…

biphobia is rampant in all walks of life sadly

The look on Bowie’s face in that last picture, he’s just like “how thick are you? I’m bi, deal with it”

This is the same tactic my 5 year old nephew uses when he doesn’t like the answer you give him. 

Source: thesun.co.uk

when I explain to adults that I don’t have my license yet and so I can’t get a job, they’re always like “just walk??? use your legs child. take the bus. ever heard of a bicycle??? so lazy”

...except most employers won’t hire or even interview you if you don’t have a drivers license (they call it “reliable transportation”). the whole “getting your first job” thing has changed completely since boomers and even millennials were teenagers. I’m not lazy, literally nobody wants to hire you if you can’t drive.

Sounds like kind of thing someone who wants to get hit in the face with a bat would say

"What keeps things alive, up to a point, is the imperturbable attitude of the titular heroine, who is invested with try-and-stop-me spirit by Moner, who's actually 18 and looks it despite preventive measures. The same goes for Wahlberg, who's 19. There's a palpable gap you can't help but notice between the essentially innocent, borderline-pubescent nature of the leading characters and the film itself, and the more confident and mature vibes emanating from the leading actors. The director seems to be trying to keep the hormones at bay, but there are some things you just can't disguise, perhaps human nature first and foremost. Dora seems committed to projecting a pre-sexualized version of youth, while throbbing unacknowledged beneath the surface is something a bit more real, its presence rigorously ignored. To be believed, this story should have been set in 1955."

The last paragraph of this is so fucking weird

The films rated PG wtf did this weirdo expect

This is the one from the screenshot but it took me a while because there were so many lambasting the original lol

what the fresh hell

Time to oppress film critics.

“But if you paid supposedly unskilled people their worth, then Supposedly More Noble Profession won’t be earning proportionately more!”

Other people having it bad too is a shitty excuse for not making things better for anyone.

“Then you should be advocating for the Supposedly More Noble professions too.”

Elementary lifesaving: worst-off and least-able-to-help-themselves are helped first. 

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Pros of chubby gf

- soft

- nice hugs

- thigh pillows??? Tiddy pillows??

Cons of chubby gf

- none

Pros of skinny gf

- fits in ur arms rly nicely

- ur hoodies are too big on her which is beautiful

Cons of skinny gf

- none

Pros of muscled gf

- abs?? Biceps??? Please???

- strong gf pick me up pls

- most likely works out a lot which is hot

Cons of muscled gf

- none

Pros of a tall gf:

-she can reach everything

-she can wear those gorgeous and long swooshy dresses without drowning in the fabric

-she still rocks heels, I mean, hello??? Tall girls in heels??? Yes??? PLEASE?

- can curb stomp facist easily

Cons of a tall gf

-none, you’re just cowardly

Pros of a short gf

- I can give her piggyback rides

- she short which means I can pick her up randomly

- she’s got a better angle for throat punching facist

- great at stealing my clothes and wearing em

Cons of a short gf

- none

Pros of a disabled gf

- she’s still her own independent person

- she’s intelligent, often times having some of the most profound things to say that people often ignore because they’re stupid

-she’s got a unique lifestyle that’s gonna be best for her and she’s gonna live life as much as she can as comfortably as she can

-stronger than any US marine

-hates fascist

Cons of a disabled gf

-none