• bind your chest
• wear masculine clothes
• have short hair
• have a penis
• swift as a coursing river
• with all the force of a great typhoon
• with all the strength of a raging fire
• mysterious as the dark side of the Moon
Me, plunking Stinky Bastard Man’s carrier on the counter: hi he’s here for shots and a nail trim and he’ll need to be sedated
Nurse: Are you sure? We can try-
Me: he needs to be sedated
Nurse: Well, it’ll take longer-
Me: he needs to be sedated, he will try to rip your face off
Nurse: Well we’ll try without first and we’ll let you know if we need to sedate
Me, watching her carry him away: you will need to sedate him
Nurse, coming back 10 minutes later clutching her hand: so, we will need to sedate him
Me:
A man with 3 caution stickers on his med file
Since this post blew up and people have asked for this villain’s record, here are some of Stinky Bastard Man’s more heinous crimes:
Ripped an escape hole
in the patio screen door
in a single night
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
oh my god he’s THIS Stinky Bastard Man!!!!
the stinky bastard man, the stinky bastard myth, the stinky bastard legend
Me, plunking Stinky Bastard Man’s carrier on the counter: hi he’s here for shots and a nail trim and he’ll need to be sedated
Nurse: Are you sure? We can try-
Me: he needs to be sedated
Nurse: Well, it’ll take longer-
Me: he needs to be sedated, he will try to rip your face off
Nurse: Well we’ll try without first and we’ll let you know if we need to sedate
Me, watching her carry him away: you will need to sedate him
Nurse, coming back 10 minutes later clutching her hand: so, we will need to sedate him
Me:
A man with 3 caution stickers on his med file
Since this post blew up and people have asked for this villain’s record, here are some of Stinky Bastard Man’s more heinous crimes:
Ripped an escape hole
in the patio screen door
in a single night
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
oh my god he’s THIS Stinky Bastard Man!!!!
the stinky bastard man, the stinky bastard myth, the stinky bastard legend
Me, plunking Stinky Bastard Man’s carrier on the counter: hi he’s here for shots and a nail trim and he’ll need to be sedated
Nurse: Are you sure? We can try-
Me: he needs to be sedated
Nurse: Well, it’ll take longer-
Me: he needs to be sedated, he will try to rip your face off
Nurse: Well we’ll try without first and we’ll let you know if we need to sedate
Me, watching her carry him away: you will need to sedate him
Nurse, coming back 10 minutes later clutching her hand: so, we will need to sedate him
Me:
A man with 3 caution stickers on his med file
Since this post blew up and people have asked for this villain’s record, here are some of Stinky Bastard Man’s more heinous crimes:
Ripped an escape hole
in the patio screen door
in a single night
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
oh my god he’s THIS Stinky Bastard Man!!!!
the stinky bastard man, the stinky bastard myth, the stinky bastard legend
rip to you guys but i love assembling ikea furniture its so fun its like legos
people complain about how confusing assembling ikea furniture is and meanwhile i rise above their understanding and exist beyond their pitiful mortal comprehension as i spend a wonderful day assembling two twin beds with nothing but two hex keys, hope, and a whole lot of screws. 10/10 experience would do again
if a terf even looks at this they will die in seven days just to clarify
If you like frogs. Or possums. Or cool builds. Or happiness. This is the video for you.
Every day I discover forms of art I could not have concieved of before, and suddenly I am in awe of being alive.
i am a serene and lovely person. yes absolutely everything bothers me & i go through life in a state of constant aggravation and annoyance & have to physically restrain myself from breaking down in tears over how utterly irritated i am sometimes. but i am serene and lovely nonetheless
genuinely and honestly I know I cannot solve all of the problems of the world etc but my friends who live in my phone please know that when you are having the horrors I am telepathically sending you a bowl of warm soup, a mug of hot cocoa, a cozy blanket, and a hug (if you want one) with my brain
