i love being shy and weird sometimes actually. kiss me

The Ring: If I had a quarter for every time a hobbit picked me up, I’d have two quarters.  The Ring: Which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it happened twice.

Of all the bearers of Sauron’s ring, 4 of them were hobbits.

I was wrong. It’s 5. Not 4

The lineage of ring bearers is as follows.

I love how Deagol counts as a ring bearer even though he had it in his possession for all of like five seconds

He held it for the rest of of his life!

[Image description: Tweet by @banalplay saying “but something happened then that the ring did not intend. it was picked up by the most unlikely creature imaginable: a hobbit, the same fuckin thing that just had it for like 500 years.” End Image Description.] Link to original here. Otherwise reblogging for the final rb there, which made me cackle.

From the ring’s perspective:

1. Home, the finger of my creator and other self.

2. Well, I don’t like it but I can work with this. Cause some trouble, get some revenge, find my way home, this is fine.

3. What the fuck is you?

4. Right personality, wrong species, I don’t know what you are but I hate you and I don’t know why you’re so resistant to my powers.

5. NO NO NO there are goblins everywhere how did I find another one of THESE horrible things. This one’s even more resistant than the last one and also disgustingly nice. I suffer.

6. Listen, I’ll cooperate, just get me the fuck out of this hellhole full of small cheerful people my power doesn’t work on properly. No, not like that. I hate you. Please stop. 

7. FUCK

8. (Frodo again) I still hate you with every molecule of my mortal form but at least you’re not number seven. Think I’m starting to get through finally. 

9. (Smeagol again) YES it’s you I actually missed you now get me back to the Master and NO FUCK NO I HATE YOOOOUUUUU…. *fzt* 

you CHAIN The One Ring?! you chain it like the prisoner?! oh! OH! trauma! deep psychological trauma for hobbits for One Thousand Years!

Heh. :)

westley in the princess bride was so funny for being like ‘talk about this dead guy you loved lol’ and getting the tea about himself

oh he was ur true love? you thought he was hot n strong? rate him 1-10 and why

PERIOD DRAMA APPRECIATION WEEK 🎞️

Ian Stone, Doubting Thomas, oil on linen, 12x16 in, 2023

"If you know the painting by Caravaggio, Doubting Thomas, it was my direct inspiration for this piece.

A doubting Thomas is a skeptic who refuses to believe without direct personal experience. 50-60 years ago, it was not uncommon for people to think or believe that being gay was a phase or a mental illness or deviance in some shape or form. It's embarrassing that the same things are being said about trans people today."

STOP SCROLLING!!! THIS IS NOT A PHOTO IT'S OIL ON LINEN!!!!!!!!!

actually how it feels sometimes to see really good art 

poor financial decisions manifesto:

people are talking about eating pickles straight from the jar but what about biting into a whole raw cucumber? like. just. you know. like a feral beast. eating a whole cucumber. in like. two minutes. anyone ever do that? bc i do all the time. cumcumber <3

ignore cumcumber. i didn't say that

i can't believe it.... my own fucking family! betraying me!

you all hate the position i sleep in because you haven’t advanced to my level and you’re jealous of my mental acuity and caustic wit as well as being extremely good at sleeping

Cackling.

In case the original goes away:

Text version:

Washington State Department of Natural resources tweets:

(Falling to my knees, begging, pleading)

Please.

Folks, seriously.

PLEASE.

Do not - and I can’t emphasize this enough - set the state on fire this weekend.

Fire danger is abnormally high this holiday weekend.

URGING you to consider firework alternatives:

- screaming “bang! boom!” at the sky

- dropping a stack of large books on the floor

- wrapping a toga around a candle

- play America the Beautiful while combining Coke and Mentos

ALL I WANNA DO IS *musket shot* *minutes-long period of silence interspersed with the sounds of a lead ball rolling down the barrel, fiddling with a cartridge, pouring powder, and locking the mechanism in place* *musket shot* *minutes-long period of silence interspersed with the sounds of a lead ball rolling down the barrel, fiddling with a cartridge, pouring powder, and locking the mechanism in place* *musket shot* *minutes-long period of silence interspersed with the sounds of a lead ball rolling down the barrel, fiddling with a cartridge, pouring powder, and locking the mechanism in place* AND *sound of a small coin purse being bluntly dropped onto a wooden countertop* AND TAKE YOUR MONEY

Wanted to draw them!!!! it’s been a while since i rendered faces so it was good practice

Over the past 24 hours

Redacted redacted redacted redacted redacted redacted

The last 20 pages of The Binding be like:

a doodle of Emmett and Lucian, the main characters from Bridget Collins’ incredible book The Binding — give it a read if you haven’t !!

oksu.mansu_

if i ever write something set in the united states im just going to do zero research whatsoever and make stuff up to sound cool it’s equality

the lush impenetrable jungles of massachusetts