the holy trinity

When I start to get emotional I immediately think “I’m so gay” and this is because straight people actually don’t have emotions

this is false and heterophobic. straight people have a panorama of emotions including:

Guy who likes music

Is he an alien

This is the funniest thing I’ve ever seen

no offense but can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars i could really use a wish right now

hey gays

Thank you, Carrie Fisher.

Carrie: specifically asks women

Man: talks

Carrie: Shut the fuck up I wasn’t talking to you

i fuckin hate that emoji face that’s laughing and crying at the same time, people will put it on literally anything like my friends were planning a picnic and someone was like ‘i’ll bring some crisps’ and used that face as if you would actually laugh so hard that u cried at the idea of bringing crisps to a picnic

hope your cargo shorts heal before the big game brah

“I have the right to think of you as less than human, but I wish you’d stop being mad at me about it and just accept it. That’s all I want for this country.”

White people be like "white people be like" but they the white people that be like

i think that uncrustables being considered a type of ravioli should be highly classified information

Y'all need to type paragraphs of arguments less and learn to say “blow me bitch” to people

the idea of consuming two conflicting things that promise to do the opposite of each other has always been hilarious to me. there’s a liquid shot-based sleep aid called 6 hour sleep and as soon as I saw it i immediately imagined mixing it and a 5 hour energy together for a 1 hour nap

mix NyQuil and DayQuil to create Quil

what does Quil do

All the time all the time

Paramore Exlusive Off The Air Interview

“have you not figured out that youve already been captured” “uuuuuUUUUUUUWAAAHHHH”

the frog:

being inside a fursuit while smoking doinks is truly as hot as a minecraft furnace

this post astral projected inside my doctor and forced him to misdiagnose me with spinal meningitis 

i have so many questions and i want exactly zero (0) of them answered.