Dear Sparkling Unicorn Diary

July 4, 2023

Sometimes I wonder if the world is deliberately punking me.

Last night I was relaxing on the couch flipping channels and on the verge of dozing off when I was startled by a knock on my apartment door.  At first, I was hesitant to answer in just my Power Puff Girls sports bra and a pair of panties.  And maybe I should have quickly run and grabbed my bath robe.  But given how it was nearly 10 PM and I don’t own a robe, I had no choice but to throw caution in the wind.  Besides, whoever was visiting me must have an urgent reason.  So, I slowly approached the door and glanced into the peep hole.

It was my twenty-something neighbor Aben with a concerned look draped over his face.

Out of full disclose I should mention Aben and his roommate Sergio repeatedly hit on me.  If they’re not crowding around when I’m at the puzzle table in the lobby, one or both are always in the pool area when I’m doing a few laps or relaxing in the hot tub.  At the National Night Out event they smothered me like sardines at one of the picnic tables when then there were plenty of other areas to sit.  They’ve invited me to parties, to movies, and once to a VFW Hall to play Bingo.  Don’t get me wrong – they’re nice guys and nothing they do has ever crossed a line with me.  But it’s more than a little obvious they want to sleep with me (just like Kevin and his recently graduated high school friends.)

So, I can’t be upset Aben checked me out when I answered the door.  If the sight of me in just a sports bra and panties wasn’t enough, I had also shaved my legs and rubbed skin cream over my body earlier.  In fact, if I still had make-up on and done something with my hair, Aben might have assumed I was waiting for a man to knock on my door so I could seduce them.  Still, it was enough for him to gaze wide-eyed at my body for a few seconds before finally looking up.

He fumbled with his words a little; apologizing for knocking so late and hoping I wasn’t already sleeping.  But he had a problem and felt I would be able to give him a hand.

After waving him in and writing on a pad if he wanted anything to drink, Aben made himself at home on one of my Lay-Z-Boys and began working his courage up while I grabbed a couple of Hard Lemonades.  Knowing what he would prefer from past experiences, I didn’t bother to ask this time if he wanted it in a glass with ice but instead just handed him the bottle.  We clanked bottles in ‘cheers’, he took a few sips, then pondered his words before unburdening his soul.

It seems he has been dating a woman for a few weeks and things are going well.  Really well!  On their last date, the lovebirds wound up kissing each other and feeling each other up with their clothes on.  And although it’s not a guarantee, Aben is convinced the next time he sees her (perhaps as soon as this Saturday), they’ll probably go further.  But he’s scared.  Not about unperforming but from something cosmetic.

You see, my neighbor had seven ugly skin tags scattered near his crotch.

Before I could suggest it, he told me he tried to make an appointment but the earliest his doctor could see him is in late August.  And given how some of the tags were inches from his penis, he was too embarrassed to ask Sergio or anyone else for help aside from me.  He figured with how laid back I am, my experience with scissors at my job, and no pun intended, my ability to keep my mouth shut, I was his best chance to get it taken care of in time.

Basically, he wanted to flash his dick out at me before he whipped it out at her.

Of course, I was extremely hesitant.  What if something went wrong?  What if he got an infection?  I didn’t want the cops to arrest me because my neighbor bled to death in my apartment with his pants pulled down.  But Aben already worked out a plan.  He already had a pair of sharp Iris scissors which he had boiled in a pot of hot water to sterilize it.  He just needed me to pull up on the tags and snip close enough without creating too big of a hole because he was too chicken to do it himself.  He already had alcohol wipes, bandages, and tapes.  And although he knew it was going to be excruciatingly painful, he gave me specific orders not to prolong it.  Just do what needed to be done no matter what.

I agreed under two conditions.  The first was if something DID go horribly wrong, Aben would go to the Emergency Room.  The second was if I was going to do this, he would need to be sitting in a bathtub of purely icy cold water.  I figured anything to stop the bleeding as soon as possible would help.  He found my terms acceptable.  Not that he had any other choice.

While I began filling up my tub and laying the supplies on the sink, Aben started removing all his clothes in the other room.  Sure, it doesn’t make any sense when you take into account I was going to see him naked in another minute, but he wanted to maintain as much chivalry as he could in the situation.  It was quite thoughtful.

Unfortunately, that crashed and burned the second he walked into the bathroom aiming his thick boner in my direction.  I shot him a “Are you serious, dude?” expression on my face to which he replied “Hey, I’m naked in front of you and you’re wearing that stuff that you’re wearing… I can’t help it.”  I suppose he had a point.

Rather than dwell on it, I gestured Aben to get into the tub.  With how small my bathroom is, I’ll even give him the benefit of the doubt when the tip of his cock slid across my exposed belly to get past me (although he could have approached with his back turned to me.)  He paused for a moment savoring what he just did, then placed his left foot in.

“HOLY FUCK THAT’S COLD!”

Giving him enough time to get accustomed to the water, my neighbor eventually managed to sit down in the tub with his legs pushed out in a froglike fashion.  Fortunately, his ‘mighty log’ had quickly transformed into a measly little stump; giving me more room to work with and without the hassle of having to touch anything more.  His body was shivering a little as he did his best to speak with chattered teeth he was ready.  It was time to operate.

When I snipped off the first one, Aben’s right hand grabbed my shoulder.  By the third or fourth one, he had managed to get both of his arms dangling over the tub gripping my waist.  The right side of his face pushed tightly against the left side of my breast.  Under any other circumstances, I’m sure he would have thought this was a dream come true.  Sergio would be jealous.  But it was clear he was receiving no joy from this.  He didn’t have me in a romantic hold.  This was anything but sensual.  He was a man only looking for the nearest available comfort to override the pain.

After four minutes, I cut off the last one in a tub that was now tinted red with blood.  Flinging the final one into the toilet along with his brothers. I gave them a quick burial by flushing them down.  Then, grabbing my notepad, I instructed Aben to sit there for a few minutes allowing the cold water to do its trick.  Small trickles of blood continued to wallow out of his wounds.  But with the worst behind him, Aben was feeling better.  By the time ten minutes had passed, we both agreed it was good enough to get out, dry off, and bandage the small holes around his crotch up.

I think he was expecting to handle the bandages himself.  And maybe he should have.  But since I was already there and seen him in the buff, I just ordered him to stand still while I applied them myself.  As I patched him up and cut strips of tape, the leftover remains of water on his body gradually dripped down on me.  On the top of my head, my face, my chest, my legs.  I know Aben noticed because he was also getting a generous view down my sports bra.  And although half of his body had just been submerged in frigid cold water, not to mention portions of his legs were most likely still throbbing in pain, his little peter chose to rise against all odds like a phoenix.

Another “Are you serious, dude?” look.  Another half-ass apology.  Only this time I had tilted my head back a little to avoid any more contact.  I’m not an expert on male reproductive organs but I’m pretty sure it doesn’t ‘wobble’ on its own unless the male is deliberately flexing it to.

It was almost midnight when he left thanking me and saying I was a huge help.  With any luck, he hoped his ‘wounds’ would be normal by the time he and his girlfriend have their next date.  But after everything that happened, everything I saw, what I was wearing, his slight new inability to walk, the fact he’s dating someone, and just the sheer personal nature of the favor itself, you would think Aben would have left things casual.  Instead, he came in for a hug, pressing tightly against my chest, and expressed his gratitude one more time.

I’m sure there are things I could get up in arms about, but to tell you the truth, I’m just relieved things worked out.

Still, I helped my neighbor increase his chances of getting his rocks off and all I got was a bathtub full of blood.  That doesn’t sound fair.

You have a PPG sports bra?! 😳

Happy Fourth of July, Jenni.

Yes, I have a Powerpuff Girls sports bra. :)

Hope you have a great Fourth of July too, @trent918! *great big squishy hugs*

*blinks*

...NOPE. I got nothin! I'M OUT!!

(Gets up from desk, leaves room, closes door, sounds of car starting up and driving off heard)