My Life is Above Average on a Consistent Basis

Fresh out of the water, newborn sea lion pups roll in sand to protect themselves from the blazing sun in San Cristobal, Galapagos Islands.

i just threw up this is so precious 

when you die and become a ghost are you forced to wear what you were wearing when you died for eternity or can you go to like Ghost Gap and buy some new ghost clothes

if theres ghost capitalism i swear to fuck ill be so mad

overthrow the boogeoisie

Another day, another story. Eh Tumblr? This one is about Rapunzel. A fair maiden locked away in a tower, hidden from ever finding true love. Sad, huh? Well not too bad. See, Rapunzel was born outside of a Denny’s. And through some fairy tale magic that reason and logic could never explain, she was given long, beautiful bacon hair. So, this prince guy was riding by her prison tower one day, when he saw Rapunzel. So he was all, “You’re hawt, why are you locked in that tower?”

“Because of this evil woman that was jealous of my face.” Rapunzel yelled down.

“Alright,” he replied, “Let down your hair and I’ll climb it, because that makes sense and won’t hurt or inconvenience you in any way.” So Rapunzel, without taking into consideration the hundreds of thousands of nerve endings and pain receptors in the human head, let down her long bacon hair so the prince could climb up. But he didn’t. Because there was too much delicious bacon to eat. And enjoying crispy bacon is much more important than relying on a relationship in order to find happiness and validate your existence. The End. 

WHAT THE HELL DENNY’S

Denny's makes my life complete

A cat montage for you

#if you know what i mean

well they weren’t wrong

This kitty accidentally stepped on a bee

MY CAT DOESN’T FEEL WELL SO MY DAD IS SINGING TO HIM

"So do you sell drugs?" "No I’m only five"

#sounds like something a drug dealer would say

Chinchilla fun fact: Their newborn babies are like little pieces of fluffy popcorn. You could easily just toss a handful in your mouth.

Chinchilla fun fact: Don’t toss a handful into your mouth.

oh ym god

the best moment in film history

9.12 // 9.17

“People say I love you all the time - when they say, ‘take an umbrella, it’s raining,’ or ‘hurry back,’ or even ‘watch out, you’ll break your neck.’ There are hundreds of ways of wording it - you just have to listen for it, my dear.”  ― John Patrick, The Curious Savage

#is this orange is the new black (x)