Citrus Frenzy By Edgar Castrejon

Colorblindness test, The Citrus Edition.

This. If there’s a penthouse suite in paradise, Captain Rostrum, his crew, and even his own passengers, had better be admitted, no questions asked. Outstanding response that saved as many as he could.

Had a great girlfriend who got the giggles when she would peak. It always sparked a laughing attack, and we’d always have to get it out of our system before we could move on. It still brings a smile to my face after all these years.

Hey guys, my cousin is missing.

I know a grand total of like, ten people follow me, but if any of you live in Massachusetts or any of the neighboring states, or know someone who lives there, please please please help us out.

He likes basketball, fairly quiet, Jewish, stupid tall.  He’s the middle child of three kids, and his little brother is only eight and is scared to bits.

Here is a newsblog with more info:

https://patch.com/massachusetts/framingham/missing-person-alert-teen-disappeared-framingham

If you see him or have information please call: 508-872-1212

Please reblog if you can.

this

Definitely. If you have my number, you’re not a stranger to me. I’m your big brother, and I’ll slaughter anyone with bad intentions towards you.

Wonder Woman (2017)

This was awesome. We hadn’t real seen how strong WW is in the DCEU up to this point. I was thinking she was like just over the line of the strongest human athletes… then she just hucks and armored car. 

She also went toe to toe with Doomsday in Batman vs. Superman, and cut his lower right arm off just below the elbow. Badass!

I’ve never done proper fanart of Terezi (not that this is incredibly proper), but it was so much fun to give her a go.

I’m lucky to be a libra, she’s so great. 

Because Libra's should come with a warning label. CAUTION! Contents are unstable! May detonate if looked at wrong!

Happy, happy birthday to the best god damn country the world has ever known.

Long may she remain free!

hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

ahhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Nope

Fuck centipedes and everything that they love

Y'all be afraid of sonething with legs. Pssh.

You should be too. Could probably deliver a package faster than you.

Nuke it from orbit. Only way to be sure.

You don't pick the military for "Easy". I'm a retired E-6 with 18 years of service. I've been to every shithole that America has troops in, and have seen quite a bit more than your average McDonald's manager. I use a prosthetic leg, have a glass eye, and have been diagnosed with high level PTSD. I can promise you that any job that you wind up doing won't be easy. You need to realize that the military has one overriding purpose. War. When you boil it all down, that is what it exists for. When you forget that, and get lazy and complacent, war will remind you that nothing about it is easy. Every single job in the military is part of one massive responsibility.

Today, on June 2, 2016, Marine Captain Jeff Kuss, Blue Angel #6, passed away during a practice flight in Tennessee. America has lost an incredible pilot and warrior. Blue skies, Marine. (Photo)

From the overhead of his flight path, he stayed on the stick to keep it away from people on the ground. May we prove worthy of his sacrifice. Semper Fidelis Marine.

wow i really wanna get crunk

This is important

I want a zombie

@astraeavixen Reblogging for future use.

Now this is what I call a liquid pharmacy!!!

[Fallout 4 Add-Ons]

• Wasteland Workshop | Release: April 2016 ↳   With the Wasteland Workshop, design and set cages to capture live creatures – from raiders to Deathclaws! Tame them or have them face off in battle, even against your fellow settlers. The Wasteland Workshop also includes a suite of new design options for your settlements like nixi tube lighting, letter kits, taxidermy and more! •  Automatron | Release: March 2016 ↳ The mysterious Mechanist has unleashed a horde of evil robots into the Commonwealth, including the devious Robobrain. Hunt them down and harvest their parts to build and mod your own custom robot companions. Choose from hundreds of mods; mixing limbs, armor, abilities, and weapons like the all-new lightning chain gun. Even customize their paint schemes and choose their voices! •  Far Harbor | Release: May 2016 ↳ A new case from Valentine’s Detective Agency leads you on a search for a young woman and a secret colony of synths. Travel off the coast of Maine to the mysterious island of Far Harbor, where higher levels of radiation have created a more feral world. Navigate through the growing conflict between the synths, the Children of Atom, and the local townspeople. Will you work towards bringing peace to Far Harbor, and at what cost? Far Harbor features the largest landmass for an add-on that we’ve ever created, filled with new faction quests, settlements, lethal creatures and dungeons. Become more powerful with new, higher-level armor and weapons. The choices are all yours. 

“And more important, that this is only the beginning. We have plans for more. More than $60 worth of new Fallout adventures and features throughout 2016.

Given the expanded DLC plan, the price of the season pass will increase from the current $29.99 to $49.99 USD (£24.99 to £39.99 GBP; $49.95 to $79.95 AUD) on March 1, 2016. However, if you already purchased the season pass for $29.99, nothing changes - you still get everything at no additional cost— the full $60 offering of add-on content for the original price of $29.99. In addition, if you didn’t buy the season pass yet, there is still time: anyone who buys the Season Pass for $29.99 before March 1st will get all $60 worth of content. This is our way of saying thanks to all our loyal fans who have believed in us and supported us over the years.

Want a chance to play these add-ons early? We’ll be running closed betas for each of the add-ons for consoles and PC. And you can sign up right now on Bethesda.net. In order to apply, you’ll need to create a registered Bethesda.net account. We’ll be selecting applicants in the upcoming weeks. Players accepted into the beta will receive a code to redeem the content. The beta is the full version (complete with achievements) and those participating will not have to purchase the add-on.

Beyond add-ons, we’ll continue to offer free updates to the game, including new features like the recent weapon debris for PC, and increased draw distances for consoles, as well as more optimizations to gameplay and quests. And something that we’re really excited about, a complete overhaul of Survival Mode that changes how you play the whole game: food, sleep, diseases, danger and more.

We’re also hard at work on the Creation Kit, which will allow you to create and play mods absolutely free. We’re currently testing both Survival Mode and the Creation Kit now, and more details will be forthcoming.

Thanks again for your continued support of Fallout 4. We can’t wait for you to play more!”

Great Gods... I have to admit that I'm completely addicted to Fallout 4. This news is extremely welcome for my gamer group. The only persistent gripe I've got is, "WHY DO MY COMPANIONS CONSTANTLY GET IN MY FIELD OF FIRE?!?!?!" Seriously though. Piper is a serious drain on my resources. I'm constantly repairing the set of power armor that I put aside for her. Yes, Danse has a magical suit of T-60 armor that never degrades, but he's an asswipe. The Paladin is good in a tight situation, I'll give him that, at least. He is probably worse about blocking my fire zone, attacking settlers without provocation, pushing the Sole Survivor off of ledges, and telegraphing my position while I'm in sneak mode. More detail for NPC behavior would bring a massive sigh of relief from a lot of Gamers, right? I'm also a console player, so a patch would be necessary in my case. Also, a structure cap? If I really want to build up my settlements, I need to be able to put up walls. I'd love to be capable of getting that level of immersion for this outstanding game. Ok, rant over. Time to go raid Big John's scrap yard!!!

Never kill yourself. Murder is the answer. Wait...

Today, I fucked up... by singing Love Story by Taylor Swift while doing guard duty

This happened last week. I am a full-time soldier serving my country and on this particular night, I am carrying out one of the obligatory duties of being a soldier, guard duty. I was given the role of sentry which basically requires me to stand at a sentry post and remain vigilant for 2 hour shifts. It was around 3am in the morning and there wasn’t a soul around. The entire time, Taylor Swift songs were flooding my head and I was quietly singing them in my head.

In the spur of the moment, I decided to sing out loudly since I was really itching to do so and nobody was around to listen. This is when the fuck up begins. I was about 1 minute into singing when my guard commander (basically a sergeant who is in charge of all the guard duty personnel for that day) comes out of the guard room and hollers at me to shut the **** up as I was disturbing his sleep. I instantly became red as a beetroot and ended my solo concert prematurely. At the same time, I was perplexed as to how he could even hear me singing as there was no possible way anyone in the guard room could hear me.

I looked around me and discovered that the ENTIRE time, I hooked the walkie talkie onto my uniform in an odd way that had caused the Push-to-talk button to be depressed. In other words, my satanic singing had been heard by all the other duty personnel who were carrying their walkie talkies. Needless to say, I was really embarrassed.

edit: the comments are too funny to leave out; all about the taylorswift

This’ll probably be me 

Makes me wonder if the Shift Commander was listening in. He could have any number of examples to set if he's a Junior Officer out to "Advertise". Hopefully he was a leader and not a manager. The guy serenading Taylor Swift had best get his Dress Uniform ready, just in case the boss is a micromanaging Fucktard.

Strong words to use on a Resume

Now this is a great resume list of action words.  I love that it’s broken down by types of jobs.  Saving for future use.

If anyone out there is trying to find a decent job, here are some power words for the grammatically challenged. Consider this a kind of Cliff notes for entry level positions.

How cool! I have been making these for over 15 years, it is so neat to see other people doing it.

I should make a tutorial on how I do it. :)

Yes please.

I second the motion! I've got some very old tools that need to be repurposed.

“Crypt of the Necrodancer” where you use a dagger to dance beats.  I suck at this game btw.

The shovel from “Shovel Knight”. I feel good about this!

Ork dual linked shoota and a ork chainsaw axe….im good

Oh shit, I’m wheelchair guy from Happy Wheels

dual-wielded ove9000 Saws in payday2

The M60E4 from battlefield 4. Come the fuck at me.

Fn FAL Hbar in mgsv. I think I’m good

So we have a dancing knife, a shovel, a rocket jet pack, two huge diamond cutter saws, the pig and the right arm of the free world. Squad goals.

M14 EBR MOD 0 in Arma 3. Yeah, I think our squad is pretty set.

SVG-76 from MGS5. You want to fuck on meeeee!?

B-17G with an endless supply of .50 cals.

Get a mop, there's gonna be guts on the ceiling!!! Running with a Tediore Brisk Plasma Caster SMG in Borderlands 2. Maggot suckers are toast.

Tips for living alone

Buy a bat (I have my old color guard rifle) or similar. Keep it in your room/near your bed.

Get a lock for your bedroom door.

If you’re moving into a new place, change the locks. Who knows who had a key to your place before you.

Keep your phone/a phone in your room.

Get a weather alert system set up. App, weather call, little weather radio that tells you about major weather events.

Adopt a pet

Wave at your neighbors. Take note of the ones that make you uneasy. Watch out for kids always.

Be nice to your mail person. No matter what.

If you choose to drink/etc alone, unplug your wifi router. You’ll thank me.

Have extra seating. People sit when they visit. Your one comfy chair is great for you. Not so great for you + grandma + ur five cousins, your aunt, and a couple others.

Learn the self-Heimlich

When you take a shower, bring your phone to the bathroom in case you fall your phone is no longer halfway across the house, it’s just on your counter

Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Idk what else

If you live in an one-room apartment, put a screen around your bed. It’ll feel less like you visit people, esp. strangers, into your bedroom. Also you’ll feel much safer sleeping in the enclosure. Cook enough for a few meals each time you cook, and freeze the extra food. That way you’ll prevent things from expiring and it’s great when you don’t feel like cooking or have no time or energy for it.

Give a key to someone near you trust, or hid it somewhere few people will look, like up in a tree. Shutting yourself out isn’t nice, esp. not at night. Put something translucent like curtains or stickers for windows where people can walk past or look in. You’ll feel less watched that way.

Put some contant money somewhere in your room. Good to have in case your bag gets lost or stolen. 

Feeling lonely? Remember, online contacts are not less valuable.

I would say maybe set reminders for everything too. Taking meds/vitamins, working out, going to sleep, waking up.

Buy a small fan for white noise at night if you’re the kind (like me) that gets anxious at all the little ambient noises that ANY building can supply in the dark. Don’t watch scary movies in the dark by yourself, with no visitors. NETFLIX, if you can afford it. It’s also useful because you can watch movies / shows with your online buddies at the same time, miles and states and (sometimes even) countries apart.

get an app like safetrek. never walk into allies or empty streets if there is a more populated/well-lit route to your destination. keep emergency contacts in your wallet and a red cross card with your blood type on it in case anything happens. carry a list of medications you’re allergic to, if any. 

walking around with a headset or headphones discourages people from yelling at you on the street, and it’s easier to escape from hasslers. however, it’s pretty advisable to not have anything actually playing so you can be aware of your surroundings. if anything, have it at low volume.

if you get grabbed on the street (this used to happen to me a lot), immediately scream, and the person will usually get startled, giving you time to get away. 

if you feel like you’re in a really bad place, call someone, or even pretend like you’re calling someone. say where you are. act like you’re planning on meeting up with them. be loud about it. make it seem like someone will notice if you go missing, even for a little bit.

also u should look up manufacturer’s coupons like damn i feel like a successful suburban mom every time i walk into cvs and save 2 dollars on my toothbrushes

PSA PSA EVERYBODY NEEDS

Lol I still have my rifle just in case too

Important stuff here for kids getting ready to move out, and on their own. Make sure that you're aware of your surroundings. Put the phone down while you're out and about in an unfamiliar neighborhood. Use your eyes, and trust your gut. Do everything you can to prevent winding up on the back of a milk carton.