You never see good camouflage.

there are 4 people in this picture

guy who is totally definitely not an allegory for satan

also on a fully unrelated note to the rest of my blog my favorite thing about the qsmp is quackity realizing just how unique the phenomenon he created is every two weeks. the eggs were just some cute almost pets to take care of, until everyone got emotionally attached and now the players would commit crimes against humanity for their minecraft children. bringing creators from all over the world together resulted on some unlikely friendships that never would have happened otherwise, think roier and cellbit, philza and forever, charlie and mariana, jaiden and roier, and so many more. and if the cinema night proves anything, it's that the fanbase is immensely creative, making everything from hilarious memes to an amazing 10-minute moving comic diving deeper into a character's lore with quality worthy of professional animation. like... godspeed you lil Mexican streamer, good on you for accidentally creating one of the coolest things I have seen on Twitch in recent years

A thorough exploration of "Time To Smile".

For context -- over a month ago, this YouTube channel called "Time To Smile" popped up, posting those spammy Facebook style positivity videos that are just viral clips with voiceovers on them. The weird thing about this channel is that all the voiceovers, for a while, were done by Jschlatt. (Some people assume that this was AI TTS - and the acronym of Time To Smile is... well I feel like it's fairly obvious).

I find it heavily unlikely that these videos are actually TTS, though. Here's a list, with examples, of each person featured on the channel (more than just Schlatt have appeared since the first few weeks of posting, though he remains the primary narrator). Pick whoever you're most familiar with, or SwaggerSouls if you're not particularly familiar with any of them. You'll notice that while the content of what they're saying is particularly generic, it's far too natural to be a text-to-speech generator.

Jschlatt Jack Manifold Yumi TommyInnit Slimecicle Wilbur Soot Ludwig SwaggerSouls

As to not clog things, I'm putting the rest of this post under a read more link :)

the funniest thing ever just happened to me

im changing my name purely bc i don’t like it and we just told my family like a month ago. i haven’t been home since then but today i got back and my (extremely country) uncle gives me a pat on the back and goes “so i hear you’re my nephew now. proud of you, son” and i have to very gently say i am so so happy to hear that but i am still his niece just with a cooler name. and he throws his hat down on the table and goes “no! but ive been practicing!” so now he is calling me his nephew for fun

confused misgendering (affectionate)

In complete seriousness, they need to make laws about ads that say they can take no more than one, maybe two, clicks/taps to close/skip. No more "wait 10 seconds until you can skip the video, wait 10 seconds until you can skip the fake playable ad, wait 5 seconds until you can close the 'download now' overlay, puts up a half-screen in-app appstore pop-up (which at least you can close immediately)." This should literally be illegal to do.

Edit: this is blowing up so I just wanted to add (haha ad) that this was my "reasonable request" I also think there should be way more and way stricter laws around all advertising in general. I think most advertising as we know it today should be abolished.

Shoutout to the media that comes in forms that are just kind of incompatible with your brain. Shout out to the stories you know you'd love if the format was something you could handle. Shoutout to the tv shows that I can't hold the attention to sit down and watch all the way through, the actual-play podcasts whose improvised chatter slides right off my brain, the roguelike video games whose mechanics kind of frustrate me, the action-based free-to-play browser game-worlds that I forget what I was doing when I come back each day.

I know I would love you if I could handle your medium.

wizards thinking of clerics as hacks cause we spent years of study learning the secrets of the universe they cheated and got a god to do their magic for them

clerics thinking of wizards as hacks cause we spent years serving and cultivating a deeply personal relationship with a god they copied down some cheat codes to make stuff blow up

And sorcerers are like "no wait, hold on. This is basically a curse. I've been *experiencing* magic against my will since I was born and it's hurt a lot of people."

... and then everyone glares at the warlock in the corner. Their response: "Yeah, no. That's fair. I blew Cthulhu in the parking lot behind the McDonald's and now I can do magic. Best deal ever. You all can (and should) suck it."

when he starts talking about how much he hates unions but you’re from Appalachia

(he doesn’t know I’m about to union-bust his head open)

post dedicated to the scab actors and writers

damn. this post blew up. read up on the West Virginia Coal Wars and remember not to cross picket lines. unionize.

GUYS

So we've seen Youngblood as a pirate and a cowboy. Yes but what else do kids like Youngblood like to pretend to be, Firefighters, Explorers.... ASTRONAUTS!

So.

Youngblood pretends to be an Astronaut and leaves Amity for space to go play. Danny sees him leave and goes after, just to get him back.... no other reason... it's not like... it's space or anything... yeah... and... oooh was that Mars he can see? Ohhh look a comet is going by... but the thing is by the time he finds Youngblood... hes..he's...

Taken over the JL's Watchtower.

Oh... oh no.

I love how we got the introduction to TREE LAW a few weeks ago, when that story went viral on Twitter about the person whose neighbor illegally had all of their trees chopped down because they wanted a city view, so that we would understand what was happening when Universal thought it would be funny to deprive strikers of shade by "trimming" city-owned trees to the point of destruction.

This is an excellent example of organically teaching concepts without relying on tedious tutorials or forced, immersion-breaking expository cutscenes.

A++++ game design. 10/10, no notes.

Somebody just tried to solicit artwork from me and addressed me as “Kinkfisher” and friend, I will not work on your project, but I may have found my next AO3 handle.

Somebody just tried to solicit artwork from me and addressed me as “Kinkfisher” and friend, I will not work on your project, but I may have found my next AO3 handle.

The kinkiest fishers:

7) Belted Kinkfisher

6) Half-collared Kinkfisher

5) Ringed Kinkfisher

4) Moustached Kinkfisher

3) Collared Kinkfisher

2) Mewing Kinkfisher

1) Society Kinkfisher

This is going to be an unpleasant post but I need to talk to y’all about heat stroke in dogs. I am an ER vet and I am seeing firsthand the death toll that this heat wave is taking on our pets. In the past two weeks, for every single weekend shift I have worked, we have had at least one DOA with a body temperature over 107 degrees. One of them had simply been on a 20 minute walk at 5pm. All of them were brachycephalic (short faced breeds like pugs and french bulldogs). Their owners were in shock that this could happen so quickly, and their grief lingers with me.

If you have a dog, and especially if you have a brachycephalic dog, you need to familiarize yourself with the signs of heat stroke. Do not take your dogs out in the heat of the day, be aware of the pavement temperature, and always have fresh water available for them. When I am outdoors with my dog I am checking on him constantly. This heat wave is extremely serious; I need you to keep yourself and your pets safe.

funny phrases to use when something goes wrong instead of jokingly saying "i'm going to kms":

feel free to add on

THIS ONE WINS

oh you know

What is homestuck? Is it like goncharov?

dead metaphors are really interesting honestly and specifically i’m interested in when they become malapropisms

like, the concept being, people are familiar with the phrase and what people use it to mean metaphorically, but it’s not common knowledge anymore what the metaphor was in literal reference to. people still say “toe the line” but don’t necessarily conjure up the image of people standing at the starting line of a race, forbidden from crossing over it. people still say “the cat is out of the bag” without necessarily knowing it’s a sailors’ expression referring to a whip being brought out for punishment. some metaphors are so dead we don’t even know where they come from; like, there are ideas about what “by hook or by crook” references, but no one is entirely sure. nobody knows what the whole nine yards are.

and then you throw in a malaprop or a mondegreen or two, where because people don’t know what the actual words of the expression refer to, they’re liable to replace them with similar sounding words (see “lack toast and tolerant”). so we can literally go from a phrase referencing a common, everyday part of life to a set of unfixed, contextless sounds with a completely different meaning. that’s fascinating. what an interesting piece of the way language and culture are living, changing, coevolving things.

maybe part of the reason we can’t figure out where some phrases come from is that over time the words themselves have changed! one of the theories about “the whole nine yards” is that it’s a variant of “the whole ball of wax,” which some people further theorize was originally “the whole bailiwick,” meaning just “the whole area”! the addition of “nine yards” might be related to “dressed to the nines,” which might reference the fucking Greek muses! language is so weird and cool! (and I only know any idioms in two languages!)

the point is. I just came across the words “nip it in the butt” in a piece of published, professional fiction, and now I can’t stop giggling.

“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

An actual World Heritage Post

how does this post not have a million notes but anyone online can quote it

one week until ten years of Spiders Georg

fun fact I finally got into contact properly with OP so they get a cut of this ‘ol gal’s print sales $$$: