someone correcting me on something i said to be silly on purpose and now theyre treating me like im stupid

IM PLAYING! IM PLAYING!!!! WHY ARENT YOU PLAYING WITH ME WHY ARE YOU PUTTING AWAY OUR TOYS

hey netizens! i'm not sure how many people are aware, but youtube's been slowly rolling out a new anti-adblock policy that can't be bypassed with the usual software like uBlock Origin and Pi-Hole out of the gate

BUT, if you're a uBlock Origin user (or use an adblocker with a similar cosmetics modifier), you can add these commands in the uBlock dashboard to get rid of it!

reblog to help keep the internet less annoying and to tell corporations that try shit like this to go fuck themselves <3

Where do I copy-paste these to? "My filters"? "My Rules"?

'my filters'! if you look closely you'll notice the format is different between the two pages. the (website)(##)(additional text) format goes in filters

Tell me about a joke that you and your family absolutely lose your shit over that other people would not get.

Tell me about the very unique way you pick on each other.

Or tell me about a pop culture reference your family will never let die and you’ve never heard any other family use it.

*chin on hands* I just love hearing these stories. (I’m obsessed with little loser microcultures like families and very niche fandoms) So lay it on me.

My father is deaf. He lost his hearing due to an injury at a very young age, but because this injury was caused by abuse, it was not addressed and thus he was not provided with any deaf-specific resources until he was an adult. Thus, he speaks and does not sign often. You need to know this to understand the rest.

I was... probably about 16 at the time. My sisters, my parents, and I were gathered around the table eating dinner one day. We were having a very heated discussion about school politics, since I had one sister with a school-aged son, one sister starting college to become a teacher, me finishing high school, and my parents considering their retirement strategies from their own teaching jobs.

I believe the particular topic was regarding standardized testing and how stupid it is. We were all in agreement we just collectively get loud when we're passionate.

Anyway after a yelling match about what should be done to replace standardized testing, which we were NOT in agreement about, everyone at the table turns to look at my father who technically has the most experience and is the only one who has served in an administrative role in education.

Dad chews his food very thoughtfully. Ponders a moment. And then says a single word.

Strawberry.

Apparently, according to him, he'd stopped being able to understand us (an unfortunately common occurance, due to his disability, and one he's never felt comfortable interrupting to ask us to help him catch up) and thought we'd switched topics to what we should have for dessert. And, because of this, he thought the question we'd asked of "what do you think, dad?" was talking about what type of pastry we should try making. In his mind:

"We should replace [?????????] and it'd be better for everyone and we'd all like it more! Who doesn't love st[???????]y?ing? and then we could have more time for [?????????] and then we'd actually a?ae?[?????]t it. What do you think, dad?"

To which he thought, well, everyone here likes fruit. So. "Strawberry".

The hearing folks of the table also paused. Then burst out laughing. Dad laughs too. He realizes that he's guessed wrong. We realize what's happened. We catch him up to speed. He replies, I still think strawberry is a good answer.

14 years later, every once in a while during a heated family discussion, he gets a twinkle in his eye. A little mischevious smile. And when the table asks him for his thoughts, he strokes his chin like a goddamned cartoon character and says: "Strawberry."

To this day, it cuts through whatever family tension is going on, and results in us laughing to the point of tears.

dark and brooding guy with horrible regrets yells "I HAVE BLOOD ON MY HANDS!" in a moment of vulnerability but theres a cutaway transition where hes at a state fair eating a banana and he throws the peel over his shoulder and the tilt-a-whirl operator slips on it causing him to fall on the controls and shift it into a skull and crossbones setting called OVERDRIVE and the tilt-a-whirl spins so fast it lifts off the ground and carries the people away screaming

this lab safety training module is sending me

I feel like whoever wrote these questions was speaking from experience

He’s growing

It's you @tribs-cozy!

Child walking into animal shelter and walking out with a single ant on a leash

Top 5 furry species for how easily micros would get lost in their tails:

Raccoon

Fox Squirrel

Skunk

Giant anteater

Daz you forgot #1: Me

Now Julian, you are on the Top Species That Micros Can Get Lost INSIDE Their Tails list

Hey, Hey now there's a LOT of fluff there TONS of fluff to get lost in ignore the mouth you could get swept up in that no problem (you will)

Top 5 furry species for how easily micros would get lost in their tails:

Raccoon

Fox Squirrel

Skunk

Giant anteater

Daz you forgot #1: Me

people put spreads on crackers right?

A continuation on my post about unloved foods, specifically this is my in-depth defense of root beer.

Root Beer isn't inherently gross, it's just one of those weird local flavors that's off-putting to people who didn't grow up with it. We all like different things and also we all tend to like flavors that are similar to what we grew up with. That's okay! But honestly root beer is pretty unique and, in my opinion, delicious.

One of the main complaints against root beer is that it tastes like medicine. Funnily enough, it was originally marketed as medicinal! This is true for most OG sodas actually. Pretty much as soon as carbonated water was invented, people were drinking it to soothe various ailments. A lot of the original soft drinks were actually invented by pharmacists. I just think that root beer is especially cool because the main flavor came from the root bark of sassafras, a common North American shrub. Because it's so widespread and aromatic, all parts of the sassafras plant have been used in food and medicine by many different Native American tribes throughout history and was subsequently picked up and used by European colonists. In the 1960s, some studies indicated that that safrole oil, which is produced by the plant, can cause liver damage. Whether or not this would actually remain true after it had been boiled and added to root beer is unclear, but it was really easy to replicate the flavor, so the sassafras in commercial root beer these days is artificial. Another fun fact about safrole is that it's a precursor in the synthesis of MDMA. None of this information has stopped my childhood habit of eating sassfras leaves right off the shrub whenever I walk past it on a hike. I'm like 85% sure it's safe and also mmmm yummy leafs go crunch.

Another root beer complaint is that it tastes like toothpaste. I think this is probably because another key flavor in most root beer recipes is wintergreen. I'm assuming that the people who think this are the same people who think mint chocolate chip ice cream tastes like toothpaste. I can understand and even respect that some people don't like mint and associate it only with brushing their teeth, but like. Mint is a pretty common flavor. I mean I think it's safe to say that humans have been eating mint flavored stuff for longer than toothpaste has existed... anyway!

Other common flavors in root beer (real or artificial) are caramel, vanilla, black cherry bark, sarsaparilla root, ginger, and many more! There's not one official recipe, and root beer enthusiasts often have strong opinions about different brands. Some root beer is sharper, with more strong aromatic flavors, and others are mild and creamier.

Another thing I think is cool about root beer is that it's foamier than most sodas. This was originally because sassafras is a natural surfactant (and why sassafras is also a common thickening agent in Louisiana Creole cooking.) These days, other plant starches or similar ingredients are added to keep the distinctive foam. Root beer foam > all other soft drink foams. That's why root beer floats kick more ass than like, coke floats.

If you've never had root beer before, imagine if a sweetened herbal tea was turned into a soda, because that's basically what it is. If your first response to that is a cringe, fair enough. That's why lots of people don't like it. If your first response to that is "interesting... I might actually like it, though" then I encourage you to track down a can of root beer today, hard as that might be outside the US and Canada. Next time you see an "ew, root beer tastes like medicine/tooth paste" take, know that there's a reason for that, but also the same could be said for literally any herbal or minty food/drink.

My final take on root beer is that it would be the soda of choice for gnomes. Thank you and good night.

The vegemite people and the beans on toast people coming after root beer is why aliens lock their doors when they drive past earth.

If you went to the post I linked in the first sentence, you'd see that this entire root beer essay was inspired largely by trying vegemite for the first time and loving it, despite everyone telling me I'd find it nasty.

if i had a lame ass boyfriend i would hype him so much i would make him wait out side so i could go in first and be like get ready here comes the most specialest boy ever if you dont cheer and clap for him ill fucking blow this whole building up

I love to read the notes on this post, you guys are amazing!

This is satire worth of the onion

Playing pokemon today and had a nice little picnic and I left it running for 5 minutes when I went to pee, and I came back to 6 fucking eggs in my basket. This is my party.

They are all male except my goddamn houndoom. I have 6 houndour eggs from when I looked away for a couple of minutes, and as someone with no idea about egg groups I have no idea who the father is.

Slut Shame Her.

i love when people go "this looks like a 10k post to me" because it never works half the time and i just see them try so fruitlessly in my notes

try me bitch

..... hey guys....... uh you might wanna calm down.......

hey

hey tumblr user ctntduo

my good friend

just lemme try something here

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YOU GUYS FORGOT THE POW.

crying and sobbing.

K

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KUNG POW POW?

K

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WHAT HE FUCK.

WHAT THE FUCK

FUCK

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I cannot fucking believe how much I'm losing my mind right now over soy sauce history. I'll tell all of you about it after I finish this essay because I need to un-distract myself enough to finish it but what the fuck? What the fuck is going on? I'm losing my fucking mind.

During World War 2 there was a push to industrialize the Japanese soy sauce industry to be better for mass-production. This innovated the chemical fermentation technique and the semichemical fermentation technique utilized by Kikkoman; rather than ferment for four years in gigantic cedar barrels, kioke, instead fermentation takes place for six months or a year in stainless steel barrels which utilize electrolysis to artificially speed up fermentation processes.

During Postwar occupation by Americans, Japan was experiencing massive shortages for the raw materials needed to make soy sauce nationwide, and was forced to rely on exported materials from America to make production. A single American woman named "Ms Appleton" was given total control of apportioning all American soy bean rations to companies, how much, and to who. She had no knowledge of soy sauce, allegedly.

She apparently had so much power over Japanese soy sauce production that she could singlehandedly shape its future by threatening to not give soy beans to any company, family, or factory which did not utilize her specific requirements of semichemical fermentation (reduced from chemical fermentation, since it was that abhorrent). These days, the term soy sauce is distinct from traditional shoyu, and requires distinguishment because of such a radical difference the two products are.

Here's the problem, folks:

I can find absolutely no evidence that Ms Appleton ever existed. There are no sources about this specific period in Japanese history that I'm able to definitively confirm. All of the sources which reference Ms Appleton are referencing in circles with each other; there is no listed source for any of them. Kikkoman's official English website is a veritable goldmine of information regarding this piece of history, with an entire 4 size 13 paragraphs. It not only gives me a first name, Blanche, but also tells me she worked for General Headquarters and that her policies and decisions shaped governmental policies heading into the future.

Except any variation of searching for Ms Appleton, Ms Blanche Appleton, and so on gives me absolutely no information about her ever existing. By appending keywords such as Ms Blanche Appleton+soy sauce, or Ms Blanche Appleton+GHQ, we can find the same couple of sources that are circling each other--or, in the case of the latter, only Kikkoman.

But there is NOTHING else. I'm getting pageantry from some minnesotan town; I'm getting world war 2 veteran records and obituaries when trying to follow that route; I'm getting k-12 teachers and a Titanic survivor named Charlotte. There is no fucking evidence of a Blanche Appleton to substantiate these claims.

And this is fucking massive. Because there should be way more information on her if this was the case; she was apparently powerful and influential enough during the occupation that she could singlehandedly enforce whatever arbitrary rules she wanted on the soy sauce industry and they had to comply or else have no product at all. That level of power is fucking insane. Imagine having so much raw influence over Japan that you could order them to completely renovate and change how they produce and make SOY SAUCE, literally one of if not THE most important thing in Japanese culinary history--and yet there's absolutely zero reference to this outside of like, three specific sites, and none of them have sources, or if they do, they source those sites.

What the fuck is happening here? There shouldn't be radio silence about this woman. There should be records of her policies, there should be legal documents in America which record how she apportioned out American exportation of soy beans to Japan, there should be sources talking about this woman's ability to transform Japan's soy sauce production so heavily that today only 1% of all soy sauce is made with pre-WW2 traditional techniques.

So if she's that big a deal then why does she not exist?

I feel like I'm losing it. I can't think about this too hard because it gives me a headache trying to comprehend any possible answer. There is so many levels to how this shouldn't be happening that I can't settle on just one. I don't understand how some foreigner American could have an iron fist over soy beans so hard that she could apparently influence national policy heading into 2022 but I can only find a first name on the Kikkoman website.

I literally just sent in a Freedom of Information Act request to the national archives asking for any records of a Ms Blanche Appleton, her reports, census information, anything. I can't believe that I'm having to use FOIA to try and ask the government to prove a woman existed because she was that big of a deal in SCAP/GHQ.

This is a translated page of Kikkoman's .co.jp website, with an apparent picture of Ms Appleton.

But this says that she has an apparent good knowledge of soy sauce brewing--directly contradictory to the Kikkoman.com claim that she had "no experience". And it also claims she was in charge of GHQ, which I'm going to assume is a mistranslation, but still.

Major General Murcutt doesn't exist. Douglas MacArthur was appointed head of GHQ/SCAP during the occupation of Japan. This now just has more questions. How did this woman become so important to GHQ that she could directly speak with a Major General? Any level of power or public view she SHOULD have isn't here. You don't just get to be colleagues of a Major Damn General in Post World War 2 Japan. That isn't given to any random housewife.

I just emailed a shoyu brewer family, Yamaroku, about this. The Yamaroku brewery was established 400 years ago; if the company/family were affected during the 1950 import rations and under the thumb of the Supreme Command of the Allied Powers, they'd have records and memory of Blanche Appleton or what it was like during that period as a brewery.

I am at the point where I am genuinely considering the possibility of Blanche Appleton never having existed. There is the chance that Kikkoman invented an 'ambassador'-type person with high influence in the General Headquarters during the occupation to grant itself apparent influence/validity/power above the rest of the competition. "The woman who controls all soy materials coming into Japan visited our main factory and said she liked us :)".

It's incredibly fitting that my first act of serious investigative journalism is about soy sauce. Like, I'm a little annoyed at how on brand this is for me. Of course I'm overly invested in this weird little nitpick about soy sauce. Of course I'm making this the government's problem.

Of course.

It's currently 12:14AM. I have just learned that a private individual submitted a research query to the Japanese National Diet Library in 2008 regarding any information or proof of Blanche Appleton in relation to soy sauce production.

The researchers found absolutely no reference or evidence of her that was not directly related to the Kikkoman company, even after trawling the archives of the Asahi Shimbun Newspaper since 1945.

This information was told to me by a follower of mine--who asked to be anonymous. So right now we have evidence that Japan as an entity cannot find evidence of Blanche Appleton ever existing within relation to soy sauce production. And I can't find evidence of Blanche Appleton existing in obituary records, nor any publicly available birth/deaths.

Right now there seems to be more and more evidence that Miss Blanche Appleton was a complete invention of the Kikkoman Company possibly dating back nearly a hundred years. But why?

If nothing comes back from my Freedom of Information Act request, I'm going to be contacting Kikkoman directly. I'm not going to just let this slide. People have been noticing this since at least 2008. Who is Miss Blanche Appleton? Why would she be faked by Kikkoman? What's the point of this lie, and if it's the truth, if she was real, why can't I find any proof of that?

Who is Blanche Appleton?

Why is everything starting to point towards yakuza/organized crime Kikkoman origin story and why am I researching zaibatsu breakups of the GHQ and where assets from various clans got sent to.