This was so unnecessarily SAVAGE! … and I’m grateful.
Anonymous asked:
What's ur opinion on the 2005 p&p?
FUCK THIS MOVIE. I HATE THIS MOVIE. There is so much whack shit in this film:
- the five sisters are KEIRA KNIGHTLEY, amy dunne, johanna mason, carey mulligan of ‘drive’, doctor who episode ‘blink’ and being the future mom of a mumford’s son fame, and the main girl from st trinians???? WHAT KIND OF WHITE PEOPLE PERFECTION their dad is president snow and their mum was vera in noted television procedural vera???? OKAY
- DARCY IS 6’2
- MR BINGLEY WAS OCTAVIUS IN ROME AND ALSO HAS THE CHEEKBONES OF A TOLKIEN ELF
- JUDI DENCH
- this movie is just Joe Wright Period Period Piece but it is THE EPITOME OF THIS VERY SPECIFIC GENRE. HE’S NOT GONNA TOP THIS AND HE NEEDS TO STOP TRYING the panning shot of the peak district??? ‘Liz On Top Of The World’ plays in the bg it’s the ULTIMATE.
- HOT LIZARD KING WICKHAM
- and okay i love how this movie shows the bennets as an actual FAMILY
- like they’re messy and tactile and they talk over one another it’s so genuine
- AND I LOVE THEIR HOUSE WITH THE CREEPING VINES
- and okay the COSTUMES IN THIS MOVIE OH MY GODDD
- everyone’s white gowns in the netherfield ball scene? YOOOOOO
- honestly the production value of this movie is nuts
- it’s the AESTHETIC
- alright so jane austen novels are awesome and they show a lot about society and relationships in the regency era
- and the thing about 2005 pride and prejudice is that it doesn’t only show the verbal sparring/tension between lizzie and darcy
- but the sexual tension as well
- THE SEXUAL UNDERTONES OF THIS MOVIE
- OH MY GOD
- IT’S SO FUCKING MUCH
- like every interaction is loaded with like sexy LOOKS and body language
- and like they don’t even kiss but it’s so obvious they wanna bang
- THEY WANT TO BANG
- SO
- BAD
- it’s like raw magnetism
- it’s something people would write ridiculous articles in cosmo about
- like that bit where darcy helps lizzie into the carriage???????
- HE HELPS HER UP
- (IT’S THE 1800S, PEOPLE DONT TOUCH)
- she looks at him, scandalised
- HE WALKS AWAY, FLEXING HIS HAND AS IF IT’S BURNING
- ROMANCE
- there’s this scene where lizzie and darcy are dancing in a crowded room but they’re so focused on each other the other people LITERALLY MELT AWAY
- LIKE THEY’RE THE ONLY TWO PEOPLE IN THE GOD DAMN UNIVERSE
- (sidebar: HER HAIR IN THIS SCENE. GOD DAMN.)
- also THE TRACKING SHOT THROUGH THE PARTY OH MY GOD
- and okay, like
- let’s not even GET INTO the declaration scene
- after a heavy dose of SEXILY AVOIDING EACH OTHER’S GLANCES IN CHURCH the sexual tension crescendos
- UNDER THE AWNING OF SOME ANCIENT RUIN
- IN THE POURING RAIN
- he advances; he admits his love
- she REBUKES him
- affronted, he insults pretty much everything about her
- she responds but rebuking him again but WORSE
- but the sexual tension’s still there
- there’s just the noise of the rain
- the air between them is so charged it could power like
- a small city probably
- THEY’RE SUPER CLOSE
- NO TOUCHEY
- AND THEN
- HE LEANS FORWARD, EYES LOCKED ON HER LIPS
- HE’S GONNA KISS HER
- SHE WANTS HIM TO KISS HER
- HE DOESN’T KISS HER
- THE
- FUCKING
- TENSION
- I CAN’T EVEN WATCH THIS BIT HONESTLY
- and she regrets it immediately after and then he DROPS OFF THE LETTER AND SHE’S JUST SITTING THERE IN SHOCK REALLY
- I KNOW BABE. I KNOW
- and it’s the kind of movie you can rewatch a hundred times and it’s still as amazing as the first time and you pick up all these little things you missed
- it was like my 20th watch when i realised that mary is in love with mr collins
- and ok THE LIVING SCULPTURES OF PEMBERLEY SCENE
- all the pemberly scenes really like when they show up and lizzie sees this bomb ass house that could’ve been hers and she’s just like, ‘hahahhahahahaha i fucked up, i fucked up. i fucked up so bad im sorry, im trash’
- AND WHEN SHE MEETS GEORGIANA AND SHE LOOKS AT LIZZIE AND DARCY LIKE SMIRK.EMOJI
- she knows
- and the scene where DARCY AND BINGLEY PRACTICE WHAT HE’S GOING TO SAY TO JANE
- REGENCY SOFT BRO AF
- and the scene before when the bennets rush to make themselves look presentable and it’s sooooo awkward and forced HONESTLY THEY ARE THE BEST
- AND JANE AND BINGLEY LOWKEY OTP FINALLY GETTING TOGETHER
- AND JANE STANDING THERE IN THE SUNBEAM LOOKING LIKE A LITERAL ANGEL AND TEARS IN HER EYES AS SHE SAYS YES
- and then
- DARCY
- LOOKING LIKE SOME FABIO SHIT
- WALING ACROSS THE MOORS
- TO HER
- WHAT THE HELLLLLL
- THE MUSIC SWELLS
- HE’S RUGGED
- ‘YOU MUST KNOW… SURELY YOU MUST KNOW IT WAS ALL FOR YOU’
- s t o p
- and lizzie is standing there with her artfully messy hair
- ‘YOU HAVE BEWITCHED ME, BODY AND SOUL, AND I LOVE YOU
- I LOVE YOU
- I LOVE YOU’
- good BYE
- and she kisses his hands? NOOOOOOO
- THEY GONNA BANG SO MUCH
- i keep this movie on every device i have in case i need an emergency pick me up
- once i watched this with dinner at night and when it finished the dvd was on a loop and it started playing again…. and i watched it again… twice
So hard it slaps.
Hope y’all donate a couple $
A quick translation:
Dude: OK, guys, let’s assign the disasters. Hum, tsunami. Who wants the tsunami?
2004: Yeah, I’ll have the tsunami.
Dude: OK, 2004 has the tsunami. 2012, do you still want the asteroid?
2012: Nah, no need.
Dude: Cool, let’s schedule that for 2030. OK, 2020, I have-
2020: FIRES.
Dude: OK, we can do fires, no problem-
2020: NUCLEAR TENSION.
Dude: Fires and… nuclear tension?
2020: PANDEMIC.
Dude: 2020, you can’t just- just have EVERYTHING-
2020: KOBE BRYANT DIES IN A HELICOPTER ACCIDENT.
1986: Wh-who’s Kobe Bryant?
1347: Heli-what?
Dude: So, you’re asking for fires, nuclear tension, a pandemic AND the death of basketball legend in your year!?
2020: TILL MARCH.
Dude: C’mon. Guys, help me with this.
1986: I would say something, but… CHERNOBYL! Oops, am I right?
2014: At least you still have the twin towers.
2000: Wait, what do you mean?
1347: I agree that 2020 is pushing it-
1945: YOU’RE LITERALLY- You’re the high point of the Bubonic plague!
1347: Oh, much apologies, Sir TWO ATONIC BOMBS!
1945: It’s ATOMIC, you f*ing medieval-
1347: Who are you calling medieval, G.I. Joe. Go play with your-
1945: Here we go again-
2000: Now, seriously, what-
1: Y’all want BREAD?!
1347, with a funny accent: Look at me! I have ME.DI.CI.NE.
the comedic timing really carries even when you don’t speak the language
Fruits Basket Rainy Day Wallpaper set!
Set 1!!
Free to use!! like & reblog
Hopping on the Vine compilation bandwagon, part 1/?
Oh god, I lost it at the Tim Hortons one.
thefutureisbroken
I never saw the cheating test questions sequel before now and it did not disappoint.
It was a simpler time
This comp is a perfect mix of classics and hilarious ones that somehow I’ve never seen before
A quick translation:
Dude: OK, guys, let’s assign the disasters. Hum, tsunami. Who wants the tsunami?
2004: Yeah, I’ll have the tsunami.
Dude: OK, 2004 has the tsunami. 2012, do you still want the asteroid?
2012: Nah, no need.
Dude: Cool, let’s schedule that for 2030. OK, 2020, I have-
2020: FIRES.
Dude: OK, we can do fires, no problem-
2020: NUCLEAR TENSION.
Dude: Fires and… nuclear tension?
2020: PANDEMIC.
Dude: 2020, you can’t just- just have EVERYTHING-
2020: KOBE BRYANT DIES IN A HELICOPTER ACCIDENT.
1986: Wh-who’s Kobe Bryant?
1347: Heli-what?
Dude: So, you’re asking for fires, nuclear tension, a pandemic AND the death of basketball legend in your year!?
2020: TILL MARCH.
Dude: C’mon. Guys, help me with this.
1986: I would say something, but… CHERNOBYL! Oops, am I right?
2014: At least you still have the twin towers.
2000: Wait, what do you mean?
1347: I agree that 2020 is pushing it-
1945: YOU’RE LITERALLY- You’re the high point of the Bubonic plague!
1347: Oh, much apologies, Sir TWO ATONIC BOMBS!
1945: It’s ATOMIC, you f*ing medieval-
1347: Who are you calling medieval, G.I. Joe. Go play with your-
1945: Here we go again-
2000: Now, seriously, what-
1: Y’all want BREAD?!
1347, with a funny accent: Look at me! I have ME.DI.CI.NE.
Two years?! I’m in!
kentishviking
why not
texas-bi-lover
I’ll try it
Double your nana, double your yum
give me luck double banana
No fucking joke, I was offered 4 days of film-set marshalling and I told him I was unavailable for one of the days but I could cancel. And he told me he’d potentially found someone else.
I reblogged this.
And not 20 mins later, he came back to me and said if I really want it, let him know now. So fuck. Wow.
Source: j4ckme
The most iconic version of Cinderella (starring Brandy and Whitney Houston) premiered 20 years ago
Y’ALL IT’S ON YOUTUBE
@airplanesandcookies thanks for sharing this! Oh man, I have so many Feels about this crossing my dash. I remember watching this broadcasted on tv as a middle-schooler, and it BLEW MY MIND. An Asian person on tv as a main character and wasn’t a stereotype? Whoopi Goldberg from Star Trek? Brandy from Moesha as the gorgeous main character who sang cool songs and got to be a gorgeous awesome princess? My tiny child brain was just overwhelmed at how amazing it all was, I think I begged my mom to let me take over control of the tv for the couple of nights it was broadcasting, when usually it was time for my fam (read: all my grandparents and mom and dad) to be watching Chinese news and dramas. This movie meant a lot to me, as a tiny Chinese kid who spent their entire childhood (and teenagerhood, and young adulthood, and adulthood…) doing OMG AN ASIAN!/BROWN PERSON! watch because I was just so starved for content that included anyone who looked even the sliiiiiightest bit like me, like I was happy just seeing anyone non-white on my screen who seemed kinda cool and not too stereotypical (lol don’t even get me started on how hard I fell for Aladdin and Jasmine as a kid), and this was in the 90s, which was apparently a golden age for representation in media for a while! Guess I’ll have to do a rewatch soon <3
some badly made witcher memes bc i have little self control
bonus:
Man Director // Woman Director
“You have bewitched me body and soul, and I love, I love, I love you.“ Pride and Prejudice
