The most pathetic loser (affectionate).

National Geographic photographers are metal as fuck

no, jason did not have a fun patrol, and no he will not stop ranting about it, and yes he does want some comfort cookies, shut up!

inspired by a comedy bit! (timestamp 17:45)

A mark on your forehead identifies the god you must worship to stay alive, usually by joining its local church or temple. Your mark is unknown, meaning an old, forgotten god sponsored you. To survive, you must either find an old temple to worship at, or do the arduous task of building a new one

Nobody in your small coastal village has ever seen the Godmark that you were born with. It’s a dark russet sequence of criss-crossing lines, with a vertical arrowhead on the left and a circle on the right, just over where your brow meets your temple. Some of the traders who come down from the mountain say it looks like one of the scripts used in the hinterlands, but not a language that any of them recognize.

“If she’s got the temperament for it, she should try her luck inland,” they advise. “No point her starting a temple here if she’d find her people elsewhere, with a little searching.”

At first, your parents are reluctant to send you away. Though you’re well-behaved and diligent in your chores, you’re a sickly child with no God to worship. And besides, you’ve always been the dreamy type–inclined to lose track of time watching the path of rain droplets chasing down the window, or the fronds of an anemone as it sways in a rock pool.

Instead, they send you to the temple of the Storm to learn all you’ll need for your own God. You are happy there, for a time: making up beds and serving food to the castaways who pass through, keeping vigil at the lighthouse, burning incense and praying with the loyal widows and orphans of the drowned.

One such widow, an old, old lady, touches the mark on your forehead. “I recognise those letters. We wrote this way in the town where I grew up, way off past the mountains.”

Your heartbeat quickens. “What does it say!?”

She squints, eyes engulfed by wrinkles and hidden behind smudged glass. “A… Ar… Oh, I can’t remember how to speak it. I left before I learnt my letters properly. There was a war, you know. But I remember,” she says, mistily, “the most beautiful pink and white flowers used to grow, on the borders of the wheat fields…”

You try to ask more questions, but remembering the war distresses her, and so you speak of other things. When she’s drifted off to sleep, you get to your feet, go home and tell your parents: you are leaving in search of your God.

EVERY YEAR

I love the alarmed tone of the cat meows when I’m home much later than usual. It sounds like “did you know?? Did you know it is late at night?! Hey! Hey! Did you know that there has not been dinner?! No dinner for cats? Hey! I can tell you are as concerned and worried about these developments as we are. My brother and I are also very concerned. No dinner!! The cats have not had dinner! Hey! Heeey!! Should you maybe call a police or pope or something? Congress? Dolly Parton? Did you know about this?”

PICK SOME RED FLAGS AND I'LL TELL YOU YOUR FATAL FLAW 🚩

some feedback :)

mel blanc fuckign yelling

He’s a freaking legend

i provide a simple service

🖕🏻       🤴🏻    🐛💤👔🐛            ⛽️  👢         ⚡️   8=👊🏻=D💦      🎸       🌂     👢           👢

how could you post this and not include a version we can use?

this is the last thing i anticipated showing up on my dash LMAO but uh. welcome back to this post i guess.

M-M-M-MULTIKILL!

Speed test (Unmute !)

Literally something out of Scooby Doo

weird little brain tweak/reframing that helped me out. i Often find that advice that seemingly helps Everyone Else doesn’t make any sense to me, in ways that are hard to describe, and it can be really frustrating. but when i find a way to explain it to myself that finally seems to break through and make it click, it feels really good

I read this and finally cleaned my room so thanks

I don't remember the name in English but my favorite vampire book of all times:

Madames and Monsieurs. Poirot has seen much evil in the world, but the evil of this man is in a category all it’s own. His crimes are those of which Poirot cannot speak of in polite company, and they stretch the limit of discretion and manners. And he flees his persecution but cannot resist to remind the world of his existence. To brag about the money his filth has brought him. To try and, how you say, “flex” on a girl who’s concern is for the future of this planet by touting his many fast cars. But she is not so easily cowed and came back strong against his crude message with one of her own. Poirot may not condone the language, but he cannot deny it may have been called for. And there, there he let his hubris lead him to make his mistake. In his video, there, there is his pandora’s box. It does not look like much, it is after all a pizza box and such food is popular among the masses today. But this box…this box proved where he was hiding away. What hole this rat crawled into!

I claim no deductive prowess on my part, Watson. Our quarry is a braggart and a fool and he has proclaimed his location for all the world to see. But the prey is still afoot, dear doctor, and we must be swift. Bring your pistol.

Batman, how can you be so sure we can find him with just that tweet?

Well, Boy Wonder, a single picture can say a thousand words but in this case we only need one. Did you see the pizza that fuel-burning fiend ordered?

Jerry’s? Why, I’ve never heard of them, where in the world could you get a slice of that?

That’s the perfect question, the cheesy clue we need to apprehend this terrible tweeting menace. I happen to know for a fact there’s only one place in the world you can get a fresh slice of Jerry’s pizza…and we’ll need some extra Bat Garlic for this trip.

Great Ratios, Batman, you don’t mean!?

That’s right, Robin, let’s not waste any more time, the citizens of Gotham are already thrashing him in the Quote Retweets.

[PERCEPTION - Formidable 13] Look closer at the video

PERCEPTION [Formidable: Success] - Now hold on. There’s something strange about that pizza box.

VISUAL CALCULUS - The name of the store that box was ordered from is “Jerry’s”.

SHIVERS [Easy: Success] - In another time, you have eaten at nearly every one of the myriad pizzerias that mark the streets of Jamrock, but never heard of a place by such a name.

VOLITION - Maybe the lieutenant has.

YOU - “Hey Kim, have you ever eaten at a place called Jerry’s?”

KIM KITSURAGI - “I have not heard of such an establishment, much less eaten there. Does this really pertain to the current investigation, detective?”

YOU - “It has to be.”

[ENCYCLOPEDIA - Heroic 16] Where is Jerry’s?

ENCYCLOPEDIA [Heroic: Success] - Then it comes to you. Somewhere, far from the insulidian isola, in Romania, is the only “Jerry’s” Pizzeria.

HALF LIGHT - You have him.