Log in
Avatar

dishin out dank memes

@punkxpeach

MN Nice | 24 | bi | punk af
Posts
punkxpeach
chongoblog
Avatar
brainstatic

Jurassic World did the Avatar thing where it made a gajillion dollars and left no cultural footprint whatsoever. Name your favorite Jurassic World character. What was your favorite line. It evaporated despite everyone seeing it.

WRONG fav character was the extra that ran away from the pterodactyls with two margheritas in hand

Avatar
ssskeletonsoffun
Avatar
thatsoneforamerica

Gotta do everything myself around here

Avatar
otterology

So, I went into this guy’s Wikipedia page, because he looked familiar. And there’s this big “Controversies” section, so I was preparing myself to read that even the margaritas/pterodactyls guy has sexually assaulted someone. But it turns out that he hasn’t. However, he:

- Has been sued for copyright infringement for a ‘blasphemous’ musical rendition of a monologue from the 1950s

- He was on a plane with U2′s Bono and his family, and the plane was shot by the Jamaican police, who believed they were smuggling marijuana. He wrote a song about the incident.

- He’s actually a singer, and his better known song in called MARGARITAVILLE. He also owns the Margaritaville Cafe restaurant chain. And has licensed Margaritaville Tequila, Margaritaville Footwear, and a Margaritaville Foods. He owns the Margaritaville Casino, has released a “Margaritaville Online” game, and he wrote and starred in a musical called “Escape to Margaritaville”

- He also wrote a song called “Math Suks”, which was condemned by the US National Council of Teachers of Mathematics for its alleged negative effect on children’s education. 

- He was thrown out of a basketball game he was watching for using blasphemous language in front of kids.

- And he was detained by French customs for allegedly carrying over 100 pills of ecstasy. Although he was released after paying a fine, and, according to him, the pills were a B-vitamin supplement.

So, yeah, that was refreshing controversies section-wise, but now I don’t know what to do with all that information.

Avatar
backyardbob01

Maybe its my age, but i’m a little concerned that the fact he is a singer and wrote Margaritaville wasn’t prior knowledge and is considered a controversy

Avatar
steelblaidd

☝️

Beach, booze, Buffett.

Avatar
alexseanchai

Jimmy Buffett plays the margarita guy in Jurassic World because his most famous song is “Margaritaville” and this is therefore hilarious, I thought

Avatar
kvothe-kingkiller

absolutely obsessed with jimmy buffett being called “this guy”

Avatar
officiallordvetinari

Love the suggestion that the song and brand Margarativille are mentioned in passing on the Wikipedia page for uncredited Jurassic World extra Jimmy Buffett

reading the first half of the comments like

punkxpeach
sagihairius
Avatar
bauliya

everyone's like wehhhhh why doesn't doctor house gets suuuueeed! like my man. literally every patient he sees is someone that's been trying to find a diagnosis for ages. i could live with a little medical malpractice if it were coming from someone ready to break into my home to look for allergens and not simply half heartedly listen to me before suggesting I lose weight and take ages of back and forth arguing to order a single test

punkxpeach
vajra-furor
Avatar
jamesroachmusic

one time i fell asleep with a half eaten bag of chips on my chest and while i was napping one of my cats jumped up on me and chewed up the bag and sent the chips flying everywhere and a bit later i woke up completely covered in shredded bag and chip pieces and the last thing i remembered i had started eating some tasty chips so for a short while i was convinced i had blacked out and gone into some sort of uncontrollable chip frenzy

punkxpeach
alexander
Avatar
manywinged

sure i guess "be not afraid" gets the point across but it's kind of old fashioned. i think angels need to update their greeting phrase. it's been like thousands of years cmon guys.

Avatar
manywinged

for your consideration