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idk what im doing here

@profoundpidgeon

~R~ | 20 | they/she | I jump from fandom to fandom a lot but it's fun ya know?
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profoundpidgeon
gallusrostromegalus
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alexseanchai
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image embedded in tweet is a full bin labeled "Free Condoms, Be Safe Today!", with the aro flag on both the label and each of the condom packets, next to a full bin labeled "Free Water Balloons, Have Fun Today!", doing the same thing with the ace flag.

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aqueerkettleofish

This is in fact a funny joke, but it's worth noting that that condoms are stronger than balloons. I say this as someone who has taken a 3 pound bag of water to the face that did not explode.

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a-dauntless-daffodil

scribbles in ace diary: Do not... throw... water dicks... at ppl... unless... you... can cover... their... medical bills....

profoundpidgeon
gallusrostromegalus
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morallygreyginger

rating actual medieval names i have found as a medieval studies student but they get progressively more unhinged:

  • William de Appeltrefeld: 8/10 bc appeltrefeld sounds like a nice place to live. who wouldnt want to live in a field full of apple trees? points deducted cause there are like fifty bajillion williams in england
  • Luke de Luka, merchant of Luca: 6/10. ur parents really werent creative huh
  • Hugh de Wlonkeslowe: 7/10. looks like a straight person trying to keyboard smash. *laughs in english place names*
  • Roger Smert: 10/10 absolute banger of a name. does it make any sense? absolutely not! but you guys. i dont think you understand. smert!!
  • John de la Bro: 7/10. when ur such a bro that its literally ur name and 800 years in the future its all people know of u
  • Hugh Sad: 7/10. weve all been there buddy
  • Gaylarde de la Mote: 10/10. slay. i bet this guys mote was the gayest mote youve ever seen
  • Hugh de la Penne: 9/10. we stan a pasta man
  • Richard de Astlegh: 10/10. verily, he shall ne'er give thee up, ne'er let thee down, nor shall he run with great haste and desert thee, he shall ne'er cause thee to weep, ne'er bid you farewell, ne'er shall he speak wicked falshoods in thine ear or cause thee harm
  • Bindo Hug: 8/10. who is this man a hobbit???
  • Eudo la Zusche: 6/10. deadass sounds like something youd see in a really bad fantasy novel
  • William crisp: 7/10. w h a t.
  • Asser son of Licoriz: 7/10 there is so much going on here i dont even know what to tell you
  • Baldwin Panik: 10/10 cause this is a heckin mood
  • Richard Cok, aka Dick Cok: 69/10. nice.