lucy liu and josh hartnett LUCKY NUMBER SLEVIN (2006)
The holy trinity of outsiders finding out stuff about TMA
ok. listen. it’s about your girlfriend. you know how we thought she was a crop-blighting witch and we were planning to stone her? so, here’s the thing. every stone we threw drew not blood but like, the black and fathomless rage of a race of titans that were once slain but could not die. and she like, rose from her hastily-shoveled roadside grave as their resubstantiated champion or something. yeah, we’re suffering the onslaught of her vengeance right now. yeah. I guess we inadvertently created that which we had so feared. yeahh. could you like, answer her texts and ask if she’ll stop sloughing our flesh with her baleful gaze every time she sees us. thx in advance
you’re simping. calves are stillborn in the fields, food rots on the plate, holy symbols for miles around are tarnished black, and you’re simping.
DAMN RIGHT WE ARE. YOU SOWED. YOU REAP.
funnytwittertweets
Get hot water, not boiling hot but almost hotter than you can stand, and put a metal spoon in it for a few seconds. Take the spoon and put it against the mosquito bite for about 30 seconds. Do it a few times if you like. The proteins that cause the itching are susceptible to heat and break down.
WHY DON’T THEY TEACH THIS SHIT I have four decades of suffering from skeeter bites behind me
One study on 146 individuals treated with a Bite-Away heat pen found similarly effective results from heat treatment; thankfully, spoons dunked in water cost way less than the Bite-Away’s 30 bucks.
You can also blast the bite with a hair dryer - learned this from my mom and it works great
My body comes equipped with a 'heat the fucker up' reaction for viruses and it won't use it on this bastard itch poison? It makes me apply the heat myself? Fuck my body.
[ID: a tweet from @/Icy_hotpatch that says, "Sorry I can't hang out I have to itch the mosquito bite on my ankle until I reach bone." /End ID.]
That was somebody's mom whose dream had always been to be a restaurant owner but sadly she married into the mafia and she was like the mom of someone important and moms are like the one authority italians recognise so when she put her foot down and said "NO. We are going to make them great food and give them the most lovely evening!" Nobody dared disagree and thanks to op she got to live her dream for a night she probably remembers them as fondly as they remember her
i made a friend at target and we found a really good glitter nail polish that neither of us bought. also i love his mom
i took out about 18k of loans for an illustration degree at a time where i thought i could pay that off in five or ten years-- that i could make money as an artist, pay my rent, pay my bills, pay a couple hundred a month and whittle it down. if i got a job illustrating for a magazine or publisher, just a few of those jobs might clear by debt. lots of places had in-house illustrators then: lots of magazines, interior designers, videogame startups, magazines, even websites. it was possible. i was promised if i worked hard to add college skills to my native talent, it was guaranteed.
i never made it. the economy crashed halfway through my degree. it never recovered. studios fired artists by the thousands and hired them on as freelancers. the housing market crashed and bounced and mutated. rent was insane. the minim wage didn't twitch. but the interest on those unpayable loans went up, and up, and up.
ive paid a couple thousand back, bit by bit. but now i owe 42,000 dollars. there's no reason for it. my lenders just made those numbers up and no one stopped them. i borrowed 18 and payed back maybe 5. no one is losing 42,000 dollars if biden clears that debt tomorrow. my debt's already been sold a few times anyway. that means even the original lender shrugged off the loss.
so yeah, i want the government to bail me out. they bailed out all the banks that fucked the economy before i ever grew up. they bailed out all the corporations who starved their workers of fair pay and steady careers for decade after hungry decade. they sure as fuck bailed out every landlord who gouged 90% of my paycheck out plus my security deposit plus pet rent for the privilege of a shitty little box with plastic carpets and leaking roofs.
all these great big men who have unrepentantly fucked up the economy bigtime has gotten to laugh it off and then chug down a firehose of taxpayer funded absolution. i want the 12,000 that my original lender already traded away, that i paid for a broken dream, to be so easily dismissed. i deserve that. we all do.
obsessed with this. theres something so wrong with him.
They deserve an Emmy.
“Well Mr. Columbo—”
“Actually, it’s Lieutenant Columbo.”
“You’re Starfleet?”
“Star who now?”
(thanks for the caption @brookbee!)
BASHIR: You’re misunderstanding the point; yes, she’s a Barbie girl in a Barbie world, but her life is merely plastic. It isn’t real.
GARAK: Ah, but therein lies the paradox. If life is a creation limited only by imagination, then what is the difference between true or imagined happiness? Some, my dear doctor, would even call it “fantastic.”
QUARK: look you two either need to order something or get out
So no shade to Discovery or Picard but the main reason I think I’m loving Strange New Worlds is because they seem to know that yes, Star Trek is about high minded discussions of ethics, philosophy and human nature (not to mention the Drama) but it is also about Shenanigans. Tomfoolery. The kind of hijinks you’d half expect to see out of a fan fic.
Shakespeare wouldn’t be Shakespeare without the dick jokes and Star Trek just isn’t Star Trek to me without the kind of vibe where, with a straight face, the plot involves body swapping, tribbles, weird Klingon bachelor parties, sex pollen, or saving the day with the power of rock music.
“Back in the day my father knew a space ship captain, real good with the ladies. He used to say, “that Captain Kirk, he was as smooth as a Klingon forehead.” Well, I always thought that was odd, ya know?”
The Voice and the Shield
A scene that touched me last episode.