pragmaticam

Assessment of the ST375 On-Board Computer

Made from Duranium, this robust desktop was intended to provide ample processing power for the busy Ensign, right up to Chief Science Officer.

Using a rather unconventional 6 bit bus, the ST375 had a novel user interface which made it impossible to use.

The indicators simply showed the binary data on the bus in real-time, and the binary input switch took 1,000 times longer to enter data than a conventional keyboard. It's difficult to imagine a single processing task this device could have been useful for.

Realising these limitations, the designers added a speech synthesiser interface for replies. Sadly, this too was entirely useless as it was impossible to understand the replies, which always sounded remarkably like an old woman on meth holding her nose.

ST series computers, frequently ripped from their mountings out of frustration, couldn't even be used as door stops in ships with automatic sliding doors.

They were eventually superseded by LCARS (Library Computer Access/Retrieval System) first installed on the USS Enterprise NCC-1701-B. A young Ensign unfamiliar with the new systems is reported to have quipped, "Jesus! We've got AI. What could possibly go wrong!", going on to request a coffee resulting in the firing of 2 photon torpedoes.

Poor Ray 🥺

There's someone out there who's way less qualified than you - living the life you want. Simply because they took action.

You will never make lasting changes until you forgive your past self.

You don't need to change the world around you, just how you react to it.

Social media is a tool to distract yourself from a life you don't enjoy.

If you really wanted it - you would make time for it.

Being selfish isn't a bad thing. Fill your own cup before trying to pour into everyone else's.

The move you're most scared to make is the one that will change everything for you.

If you won't start today - you won't start tomorrow either.

A leave voter explains his reasoning on air.