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In which I achieve a state of perfect self-parody by coming out as trans via a critical essay and a Halloween costume. Jay in most contexts; Jay Rachel or J. Rachel for professional purposes; neutral pronouns for the time being; further updates as relevant. Cheers.
(Update: Just Jay these days; male pronouns.)
Eight years ago today.
Halloween, 2013, in which I finally give in to the inevitable.
I'm not dressing up this year, so please enjoy my gddamn impeccable Quentin Quire from precisely a decade ago.
Just thinking about how republicans are going after normie sex shit like "internet porn" and "dildos" now
we fucking told y'all
to be clear: the right views any sex that isn't purely procreative as deviant. it's not just kink, or queer sex they find abhorrent. And they genuinely believe that the better educated you are about sex in general, including about gender shit, the more deviant you are. they're legitimately trying to claw everyone down to hell with them.
Now? Before 2003 it was legit technically illegal in some states for even straight couples to have oral or anal sex, and there are still laws in some states restricting how many dildos you can own etc.
I don't really know what the goal is with putting a numerical limit on dildos, but with republicans the answer is usually "There isn't one. Die."
This is your periodic reminder that it is currently right now illegal in the united states to own porn that the average person in your community would be offended by. That's the legal definition of obscenity (a piece of media that 1. Exists to turn people on 2. has no other "redeeming" purpose and 3. would be offensive to most people in your jurisdiction) and you can theoretically be arrested and go to jail for owning "obscene" media or giving it to other people.
"But that's ridiculous," you say, "porn that the average taxpayer would think was ~offensive~ is absolutely fuckin' everywhere, on the internet and in real life, and nobody gets in trouble for it." And you'd be right about that. Realistically, this is a law that cannot be enforced: it is way too easy to break, way too hard to track, and way too many people are interested in breaking it.
Same with the pre-Lawrence v. Texas laws against "sodomy" that headspace-hotel is talking about. Yeah, it was illegal to give a blowjob in the privacy of your own home. But of course most people who like blowjobs never even thought twice about those laws, because it's usually pretty easy to Not tell a cop what you do in the privacy of your bedroom with your spouse.
"So if laws like this don't actually stop people from doing whatever sexual things they want to do, why are you concerned about it? You just said these laws don't hurt anybody, right?" Here's the thing. The purpose of laws like this is to create an atmosphere where you can get away with doing ""deviant"" things... if you hide it from polite society, if you keep it secret, if you know your place.
What you can't do is go out in public and say that actually gay people can have happy relationships, or that masturbating sometimes doesn't make you a depraved sex addict, or that it's okay to want to enjoy having sex and not just do it as your Duty To Your Husband.
You can get away with doing what you want in private if you never challenge the dominant cultural message that what you're doing is gross and immoral and people who do it are disgusting freaks. If you dare to speak up and point out that your ""shameful secret"" is actually normal, off you go to jail.
That's the purpose of laws like this. To make it impossible to challenge the rhetorical stranglehold of conservative christianity on society. To shift the Overton window once and for all to the right. And that's why we need to fight laws like this with all our strength, every time the right tries to push them forward, even when the specifics are stuff like "you can't own more than five dildoes" that might seem like a silly thing to go to war over. It's not about the specifics. It's about limiting everyone's speech to things a conservative preacher would say from the pulpit.
The other thing laws like this are good for is giving the police excuses
Younger Americans NEED to understand why Lawrence vs Texas went to the Supreme Court.
In 2003, police raided the private home of two gay men and charged them with sodomy. I cannot emphasize enough that THEY WERE NOT CURRENTLY HAVING SEX AT ALL when the police raided them. But the cops had “probable cause” to believe that they had, at some point, had non-procreative sex, which was illegal under Texas’s sodomy law, so they were charged with a crime.
Ultimately, the SCOTUS ruled that sodomy laws are unconstitutional because US citizens have a right to privacy: what consenting adults do in their own homes is their own business.
What you need to know is that in four states, including Texas and. Missouri, sodomy laws are still on the books. That means that if SCOTUS strikes down Lawrence vs Texas, these laws immediately go back into effect, and more states can add their own.
What would that look like?
If you’re on Tinder and your profile says you’re gay or bi, the police can subpoena your profile and use it to arrest you.
If you’re on Scruff or Grindr, the police can subpoena your location data and messages and use them to track down and arrest you and all your hookups.
If you’re in a same-sex marriage, the police can subpoena a list of same-sex marriage certificates and arrest every single couple—even if they’re widowed or divorced.
If your school has an LGBTQ club, the police can subpoena a list of members and arrest kids & college students.
They could subpoena data from FetLife and Facebook and Twitter and, yes, if they thought to do so, Tumblr. Rainbow flag in your profile? They’re drawing up charges.
And all of these people getting arrested and charged with sodomy, when convicted, will not only have their lives ruined by jail time, but will also likely be labeled sex offenders for the rest of their lives.
This is not ancient history. This was not “back in the day.” I WAS IN COLLEGE WHEN THIS HAPPENED.
And the Republicans are frothing at the fucking mouth to bring these horrors back.
This is a good illustration of Tumblr’s brand of social justice
and he still manged to include the q slur lmao
You are literally this person
To people in the notes going “but he should still paint over qu**r because it’s a slur”: I dare you to walk into your nearest LGBTQ Center and demand that any and all mention of “queer” be removed from its displays, literature, and programs. Go ahead and tell me what they say to you. I’ll wait.
I believe I will just queerly reblog this without further queer comment.
Agreed. I shall queerly join you.
To every person on here whimpering about ‘the Q slur’ you need to realise that every single identity under the umbrella began as a slur. None of you know your goddamned history.
Did you know that the first battle cry in a long line of protests was We’re here, we’re Queer, get used to it ? Or how hard people worked to give you what rights you have today? OUT OF THE CLOSETS AND INTO THE STREETS.
People were beaten to death, hung, dragged, shot, stabbed, died in prison protesting and fighting for the rights that you enjoy to this day. People who found and created power in the word Queer so that you wouldn’t have to be ashamed to be one.
And here you lot are, screaming at the older generations that we don’t know what it’s like to be called Queer in the hallways of your high school? Are you kidding? How many of my generation, and the generations before me do you think participated in the sit ins, the protests, the marches, the public displays of noncompliance? How many do you think were beaten by police, by angry bigots, chased away, threatened with violence? How many were tased, water gunned, pepper sprayed, unfairly arrested, unfairly charged, abused, mocked, and denied?
Do you even know who ACT UP are? Do you know who Queer Nation are? Do you know who Dykes on Bikes are? Who the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence are? PFLAG, Oasis Centers, PRISM? How drag queens have been such a backbone to our community, those of you who say ignorant shit like “Don’t support drag queens!”? I encourage you, beg you, please do not continue to parrot transphobic bullshit by calling it the Q-slur – because that message originated with a group of transphobic people who didn’t like that Queer was all inclusive. Gay as a term originated as being used for homosexual men only.
How can I tell you. How can I convince you, brother; sister that your life is in danger. That everyday you wake up alive, relatively happy, and a functioning human being, you are committing a rebellious act. You as an alive and functioning queer are a revolutionary. There is nothing on this planet that validates, protects or encourages your existence. It is a miracle you are standing here reading these words. You should by all rights be dead. Don’t be fooled, straight people own the world and the only reason you have been spared is you’re smart, lucky, or a fighter. Straight people have a privilege that allows them to do whatever they please and f— without fear. But not only do they live a life free of fear; they flaunt their freedom in my face. Their images are on my TV, in the magazine I bought, in the restaurant I want to eat in, and on the street where I live. I want there to be a moratorium on straight marriage, on babies, on public displays of affection among the opposite sex and media images that promote heterosexuality. Until I can enjoy the same freedom of movement and sexuality, as straights, their privilege must stop and it must be given over to me and my queer sisters and brothers. Straight people will not do this voluntarily and so they must be forced into it. Straights must be frightened into it. Terrorized into it. Fear is the most powerful motivator. No one will give us what we deserve. Rights are not given they are taken, by force if necessary. It is easier to fight when you know who your enemy is. Straight people are you enemy. They are your enemy when they don’t acknowledge your invisibility and continue to live in and contribute to a culture that kills you. Every day one of us is taken by the enemy. Whether it is an AIDS death due to homophobic government inaction or a lesbian bashing in an all-night diner (in a supposedly lesbian neighborhood), we are being systematically picked off and we will continue to be wiped out unless we realize that if they take one of us they must take all of us.
Another text (1990):
Being queer is not about a right to privacy; it is about the freedom to be public, to just be who we are. It means everyday fighting oppression; homophobia, racism, misogyny, the bigotry of religious hypocrites and our own self-hatred. (We have been carefully taught to hate ourselves.) And now of course it means fighting a virus as well, and all those homo-haters who are using AIDS to wipe us off the face of the earth. Being queer means leading a different sort of life. It’s not about the mainstream, profit-margins, patriotism, patriarchy or being assimilated. It’s not about executive directors, privilege and elitism. It’s about being on the margins, defining ourselves; it’s about gender-f— and secrets, what’s beneath the belt and deep inside the heart; it’s about the night. Being queer is “grass roots” because we know that everyone of us, every body, every c—, every heart and a– and d— is a world of pleasure waiting to be explored. Everyone of us is a world of infinite possibility. We are an army because we have to be. We are an army because we are so powerful. (We have so much to fight for; we are the most precious of endangered species.) And we are an army of lovers because it is we who know what love is. Desire and lust, too. We invented them. We come out of the closet, face the rejection of society, face firing squads, just to love each other! Every time we f—, we win. We must fight for ourselves (no else is going to do it) and if in that process we bring greater freedom to the world at large then great. (We’ve given so much to that world: democracy, all the arts, the concepts of love, philosophy and the soul, to name just a few of the gifts from our ancient Greek Dykes, Fags.) Let’s make every space a Lesbian and Gay space. Every street a part of our sexual geography. A city of yearning and then total satisfaction. A city and a country where we can be safe and free and more. We must look at our lives and see what’s best in them, see what is queer and what is straight and let that straight chaff fall away! Remember there is so, so little time. And I want to be a lover of each and every one of you. Next year, we march naked.
Another (1990):
If You’re Queer, Shout It! Queers are under siege. Queers are being attacked on all fronts and I’m afraid it’s ok with us. In 1969, Queers, were attacked. It wasn’t ok. Queers fought back, took the streets. Shouted. In 1990, there were 50 “Queer Bashings” in the month of May alone. Violent attacks. 3,720 men, women and children died of AIDS in the same month, caused by a more violent attack - government inaction, rooted in society’s growing homophobia. This is institutionalized homophobia, perhaps more dangerous to the existence of queers because the attackers are faceless. We allow these attacks by our own continued lack of action against them. AIDS has affected the straight world and now they’re blaming us for AIDS and using it as a way to justify their violence against us. They don’t want us anymore. They will beat us, rape us and kill us before they will continue to live with us. What will it take for This not to be ok? Feel some rage. If rage doesn’t empower you, try fear. If that doesn’t work try panic. Shout It! Be proud. Do whatever you need to do to tear yourself away from your customary state of acceptance. Be free. Shout. In 1969, Queers fought back. In 1990, Queers say ok. Next year, will we be here?
One last one:
Why Queer? – (1990) Queer! Ah, do we really have to use that word? It’s trouble. Every gay person has his or her own take on it. For some it means strange and eccentric and kind of mysterious. That’s okay; we like that. But some gay girls and boys don’t. They think they’re more normal than strange. And for others “queer” conjures up those awful memories of adolescent suffering. Queer. It’s forcibly bittersweet and quaint at best - weakening and painful at worst. Couldn’t we just use “gay” instead? It’s a much brighter word. And isn’t it synonymous with “happy”? When will you militants grow up and get over the novelty of being different? Why Queer … Well, yes, “gay” is great. It has its place. But when a lot of lesbians and gay men wake up in the morning we feel angry and disgusted, not gay. So we’ve chosen to call ourselves queer. Using “queer” is a way of reminding us how we are perceived by the rest of the world. It’s a way of telling ourselves we don’t have to be witty and charming people who keep our lives discreet and marginalized in the straight world. We use queer as gay men loving lesbians and lesbians loving being queer. Queer, unlike gay, doesn’t mean male. And when spoken to other gays and lesbians it’s a way of suggesting we close ranks, and forget (temporarily) our individual differences because we face a more insidious common enemy. Yeah, queer can be a rough word but it is also a sly and ironic weapon we can steal from the homophobe’s hands and use against him.
They did it for you. They did it for me. They did it for all of us. So you wouldn’t have to go through it. So you could be freer than they ever could, than we could at your age, than our parents, grandparents, and great grandparents ever could. Not for you to invalidate the indentities of others, and your own community. You silencing Queer people and calling it a slur dishonours their legacy.
I am here. I am Queer. You will not call my identity a fucking slur and have me be silent about it. I will still fight for the rights of my community – the Queer Community.
This isn’t simply a question of vocabulary. Exclusionists and transphobes and their ilk want you to stop using “queer” because they don’t want queer people to exist. They may not be straight, but their only problem with heteronormativity is that they’ve been barred from participating in it. They’re conservative bigots and as soon as same-sex marriage was no longer blocked in the US they were ready to betray everyone in the queer community.
I’m reblogging this just to point out that most of the images have been removed because they “violate Tumblr’s community guidelines.” History. Being removed. Hmmm….
based on context, it seems what was posted was probably photos of protest signs at pride parades from decades ago, how could that violate the terms of service?
Well played for a website that boast about its 25% queer user
Hey kids, if someone tells you queer is a slur, they’re either a.) a bigot trying to trick you into hating your own community, or b.) some misguided, misinformed kiddo who wants to feel righteous but instead just got duped by the bigots
The pictures came back! Thanks @staff !
yeah someone accidentally took down pics from the wrong post. glad this came across my dash so i could let folks know.
If any of you have articles of clothing with fake pockets or no pockets or barely any pockets, here's who to blame
Everyone say Fuck You Brenda!
Happy international throw brenda into a volcano day
no, i do not believe this level of delusion about the pandemic being “over” is sustainable. i have noticed people behaving in ways they never would have before c19, like they know deep down that things are not OK and they’re scared. international travel, huge parties, etc. i don’t know. i guess i’ve been surprised and disappointed by mass human cruelty and indifference before but i really do believe there will be a tipping point. once activists can catch their fucking breath? maybe? it took 10 years of AIDS before ACT UP took to the streets. i don’t want to wait 10 years. i’ll push as hard as i fucking can but unfortunately i’m close to bed-bound by long covid at the moment. i do not want to die. c19 activism feels like a tipping point for climate change action, anticapitalist action, and abolition action. this can be a radicalizing moment. they made the US slightly more accessible for a MINUTE and then yanked it away but we *saw* it. we saw it!!!!!!!!!! efforts to squash c19 precautions go hand-in-hand with squashing anti-police protests: they know that the summer 2020 uprisings were able to happen because enough people, for a brief moment, were freer than they had ever been in this fucking evil country. when people are given resources, they give a shit. cops were the only maskless faces in the streets of minneapolis and that is not a coincidence. the old world is fucking scared and wants you to get sick and die. c19 deaths keep climbing, your yard is burning or flooding or bogged down by smoke, cops have killed more people each year since 2020. that’s the “normal” everybody is trying to convince you it’s sooooo fun to go back to. fuck off. fuck off. there will be a crack and we will kick it open
1929 Bathroom of Maison Bleue Angus, France. From Art Deco, Avant Garde and Modernism, FB.
house goals
Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men, Episode 420 -
In which Jay sits down with scholar Christopher Michael Roman to discuss his recent book, Queering Wolverine in Comics and Fanfiction: A Fastball Special; alongside queer theory, porous bodies, and nontraditional mentorship.
CONTENT NOTE: This episode includes graphic discussions of physical trauma as well as consensual if weird fictional sex.
NEXT EPISODE: Colossus and Meggan finally go to Dudleyworld, sort of!
No visual companion this week, but if you want to pick up Chris’s book, you can do that here!
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!
i did not make an x-plained list for this episode entirely because i couldn’t decide whether or not to include “tailfucking” as an entry on it. make of that what you will.
PSA:
Acetaminophen/paracetamol has a hard stop upper dose limit, above which it becomes extremely toxic.
That limit is 4g (8 “extra strength” (500mg) tablets) in 24 hours (about 2 tablets every 6 hours).
A single dose of 22 extra strength tablets can kill you.
Taking 12 or more tablets per day for more than a week can also kill you (this is about 3 tablets every 6 hours).
Symptoms of overdose take up to 24 hours to manifest, and are fairly difficult to distinguish from other problems. They include abdominal pain (especially right upper quadrant), nausea, malaise, and confusion.
The antidote (n-acetylcystine) must be given within 8hours of ingestion in order to be useful.
After 10 hours the only thing that will work is a liver transplant.
You might think “why would I ever accidentally take so much?”
Well, acetaminophen is in almost everything in the cold/flu/pain aisle. Migraine combos like Excedrin, cold and flu combos like NyQuil, basically anything that says “non-aspirin pain relief”, and anything that’s branded as a fever reducer. It’s all probably acetaminophen/paracetamol.
So the goal of this post is to get you to read the labels on your medications. Because taking taking Tylenol and NyQuil together for a week (like you might if you had the flu) could kill you.
A useful citation with slightly more detail/etc: Acetaminophen Intoxication: A Critical Care Emergency.
In adults, the minimum toxic dose of acetaminophen as a single ingestion is 7.5 [7,500 mg] to 10 g [10,000 g]; acute ingestion of >150 mg/kg or 12 g [12,000mg] of acetaminophen in adults is considered a toxic dose and carries a high risk of liver damage.
If you have a healthy liver and you just realized that thanks to the cold meds plus the headache meds you've taken 4500mg today, you're probably fine, just don't do it again tomorrow; on the other hand if you're looking at something closer to 7500mg, you might want to seek medical advice.
The above source contradicts slightly w/r/t NAC:
In addition, NAC increases local nitric oxide concentrations and promotes microcirculatory blood flow, enhancing local oxygen delivery to peripheral tissues. The microvascular effects of NAC therapy are associated with a decrease in morbidity and mortality, even when NAC is administered in the setting of established hepatotoxicity.5
NAC is maximally hepatoprotective when administered within 8 hours of acute acetaminophen ingestion. When indicated, however, NAC should be administered regardless of the time elapsed since the overdose. Therapy with NAC has been shown to decrease mortality rates in late-presenting patients with hepatic failure, even in the absence of measurable serum APAP levels.6
(The citations are found at original link.)
Essentially NAC is MOST effective when administered within 8 hours, but is likely to decrease mortality rates and morbidity from liver toxicity even if adminstered late, which is useful for those of us with anxiety to know (ie: no, all is not lost if you're not fast enough).
hi yeah so: my childhood best friend died of an acetaminophen overdose, seventeen years ago tomorrow. don’t fuck around with this.
Unispace found that nearly half (42%) of companies with return-to-office mandates witnessed a higher level of employee attrition than they had anticipated. And almost a third (29%) of companies enforcing office returns are struggling with recruitment. In other words, employers knew the mandates would cause some attrition, but they weren’t ready for the serious problems that would result.
Meanwhile, a staggering 76% of employees stand ready to jump ship if their companies decide to pull the plug on flexible work schedules, according to the Greenhouse report. Moreover, employees from historically underrepresented groups are 22% more likely to consider other options if flexibility comes to an end.
i just wanted to say as someone who came out as genderqueer in 2011, you are in no way obligated to switch from using "older" other gender terms to newer ones like nonbinary. it's okay if you like the term nonbinary, but it's also okay if you'd rather stick with something else instead, like neutrois, genderqueer, genderless, boygirl, multigender, or whatever else your preferred term may be. use what suits you
The baby so far 🐉 still got a few bits to add but Im quite happy with it so far
[ID: An embroidery frame with a mound of buttons sewn onto it. Atop the buttons is an embroidered red dragon, snoozing peacefully. End ID.]
Do you think you would enjoy a reunion with Secretary Pete?
Oh, man, I have no idea. It's definitely a thing I've thought about, in an abstract "it'd be nice to reconnect with people I used to be close to" ways.
is it good to be precise about these kinds of things?
yes
all of those funeral options like the tree pod or mushroom shroud or urn with seeds that "feeds" the tree are uhhhh, bullshit. unfortunately. if you want to be a tree when you die, be buried in the ground without a francy casket or embalming, and have a tree planted above you. this is the same thing as any of these hypothetical "tree pods" but it's skipping the scammy cash grab companies trying to capitalize on grief with fake ass science.
cremated remains will not "feed" anything, either. they'll probably impede growth, tbh. cremated remains are non-organic. what's left over after a cremation is hollow, dry, brittle bone fragments that someone like me sweeps up and puts in a big metal blender to create the smooth "ashes" one expects. By all means, go ahead and scatter ashes in nature, but don't expect anything to grow from them.
If you want your body to return to nature after death, go for a green burial or an at-sea burial. there are many dedicated green burial sites in the world, and one also has the option of simply being buried in a more traditional cemetery that allows for simple wicker caskets w/o a vault around them, and the body left unembalmed. If the tree thing is really your jam, go for burial in a dedicated green cemetery that allows your family to plant a sapling above you, or if it is available where you live have your body composted and use the soil to grow plants.
tldr; there are options for green funerals out there, and options for "becoming a tree," but I would not recommend going anywhere near products offering this such as tree pods, etc. as they are expensive scams preying on people's grief for their dumb start up. get composted or green buried 💚🌲 source: I'm a mortuary scientist and provider of both traditional funerals/cremations & green burial/at-sea burial.
Dunno if this is still open, but just in case it is: if you could pick any one character from anywhere in all of fiction, who would you dare to pit against Godzilla in one-on-one combat?
I don't want anyone to fight Godzilla. I want Gabrielle Kinney to befriend Godzilla and hang out with him and look at the ocean in companionable silence.
thinking about all the “small” art that’s ever existed. songs that were only ever sung in one village. stories written by children that got lost in the shuffle. personal paintings that didn’t survive the test of time. how they affected the lives of just a few, but still existed, still mattered to someone.
this is not a sad post!!!! this is a celebration!!!!! art is part of the human condition!!!!!!! we were born to create and share!!!!!!!!!!!
two of my favorite pieces of art that I own are a pair of still lifes of flowers, one of lilac and one of hydrangea, that were signed but not by any known artist.
(this is a terrible picture from several moves ago but i don’t have a better one rn)
I eventually tracked down the woman who had painted them: a housewife in the rural midwest who died in the 1950s. she had a son who still lived in the same town who was in his 70s, and who was not expecting a phone call from someone 50 years younger than him on the other side of the country, asking if his mom had been a painter. nor did he have any idea how his mom’s paintings ended up at a thrift store in the DC area. but he was delighted to hear that they had survived and were still being enjoyed.
and now i know that, yes, his mom was a prolific amateur artist. she painted and sewed and made rag rugs that won prizes at the state fair. and most of her art is gone but two of her paintings survived, still together, and now they hang on my wall and I see them every day. probably they’ll never be in a museum but someday they might hang on someone else’s wall, and make them happy every day too.
Don't have a question, just wanted to say I think you're really cool
I assure you that I am categorically uncool; but I am very flattered.
