I don’t know if if my in-laws are still reading this, and I’m just taking a small break from Tumblr. I’m still active on Twitter and Facebook.
When you cut an abuser off, they will pretend like all that peace you gave yourself by ripping them out of your life was actually them giving you peace because “they’ve changed.”
That’s right. They HAVE changed. They no longer have access to you, so they’re probably off abusing someone else. They changed their focus. They’re still just an abusive asshole.
Out of all of the fusions, I’ve been looking forward to doing Stevonnie the most. They’re adorable and I love their design <3
The Do’s and Don’ts of Being a Good Ally
1. Don’t derail a discussion. Even if it makes you personally uncomfortable to discuss X issue…it’s really not about you or your comfort. It’s about X issue, and you are absolutely free to not engage rather than try to keep other people from continuing their conversation.
2. Do read links/books referenced in discussions. Again, even if the things being said make you uncomfortable, part of being a good ally is not looking for someone to provide a 101 class midstream. Do your own heavy lifting.
3. Don’t expect your feelings to be a priority in a discussion about X issue. Oftentimes people get off onto the tone argument because their feelings are hurt by the way a message was delivered. If you stand on someone’s foot and they tell you to get off? The correct response is not “Ask nicely” when you were in the wrong in the first place.
4. Do shut up and listen. I cannot emphasize enough the importance of listening to the people actually living X experience. There is nothing more obnoxious than someone (however well intentioned) coming into the spaces of a marginalized group and insisting that they absolutely have the solution even though they’ve never had X experience. You can certainly make suggestions, but don’t be surprised if those ideas aren’t well received because you’ve got the wrong end of the stick somewhere.
5. Don’t play Oppresion Olympics. Really, if you’re in the middle of a conversation about racism? Now is not the time to talk about how hard it is to be a white woman and deal with sexism. Being oppressed in one area does not mean you have no privilege in another area. Terms like intersectionality and kyriarchy exist for a reason. Also…that’s derailing. Stop it.
6. Do check your privilege. It’s hard and often unpleasant, but it’s really necessary. And you’re going to get things wrong. Because no one is perfect. But part of being an ally is being willing to hear that you’re doing it wrong.
7. Don’t expect a pass into safe spaces because you call yourself an ally. You’re not entitled to access as a result of not being an asshole. Sometimes it just isn’t going to be about you or what you think you should happen. Your privilege didn’t fall away when you became an ally, and there are intra-community conversations that need to take place away from the gaze of the privileged.
8. Do be willing to stand up to bigots. Even if all you do is tell a friend that the thing they just said about X marginalized group is unacceptable, you’re doing some of the actual work of being an ally.
9. Don’t treat people like accessories or game tokens. Really, you get no cool points for having a diverse group of friends. Especially when you try to use that as license to act like an asshole.
10. Do keep trying. Fighting bigotry is a war, not a battle and it’s generational. So, keep your goals realistic, your spirits up (taking a break to recoup emotional, financial, physical reserves is a-okay), and your heart in the right place. Eventually we’ll get it right.
Source: theangryblackwoman.com
You kiss by the book.
Romeo + Juliet | 1996 | dir. Baz Luhrmann
laurasplr-deactivated20160904
Cabanel, Vénus victorieuse, Musée Fabre, Montpellier. Photo by Maia Flore.
Sherlock
Sherlock has existed for almost 130 years, and we still haven’t had a girl play the part
Sherlock was literally designed to be a boy character. I also HIGHLY doubt Sherlock has existed for 130 years.
A Study in Scarlet was written in 1886 and published in 1887, so @janto-cophine was exactly right about “almost 130 years.” (Actual research and math FTW!)
In 2012, Sherlock Holmes was awarded the Guinness world record for “the most portrayed literary human character in film & TV.” At the time, the record was based on the character being on screen 254 times–a number which has only continued to rise since.
250+ portrayals of Holmes later, anyone who wants to cry “but Arthur Conan Doyle didn’t write it exactly that way!” about film and TV adaptations basically just doesn’t get to watch any version of Holmes, ever. Because none of them–none–have 100% stuck to the book version. Also, Arthur Conan Doyle cared less about what happened in Holmes adaptations than you might imagine. Also also, the character is in the public domain now, so it wouldn’t matter if he did care. Those of us who choose to can have all the fun we want and leave the pedants to sulk about it.
So anywayyyy… The giant number of Holmes adaptations includes Sherlock as a dog (multiple times), mouse, tortoise, Muppet, and (male) cucumber. Which means, yeah, even just statistically speaking, it’s weird that it’s a struggle to find female Sherlocks when you’ve got all that going on and adaptation producers have scrambled so hard to find new twists on the character over the years. (Holmes is an escaped mental patient! Holmes fights dinosaurs! Holmes travels to the future! Over and over and over! Etc.) Even though there’s still not many of them, it’s much easier to find female Watsons–which probably says a lot right there when you think about the usual character dynamics.
But for those who want a little bit of female Sherlock in their life, it is possible to scrape together a tiny list:
- My Dearly Beloved Detective: Russian adaptation set in a universe where Sherlock Holmes is fictional, but so well-known that two women named Holmes & Watson team up to solve the many cases brought to 221B Baker Street.
- The Adventures of Shirley Holmes: Sherlock Holmes’ Canadian great-grandniece solves crimes and faces off against nemesis Molly Hardy.
- Mikeneko Holmes no Suiri: Not exactly a Sherlock Holmes adaptation, but the role of Holmes is split between a calico cat and Matsuko Deluxe.
- Anime: Aria the Scarlet Ammo has “Aria Holmes Kanzaki,” a female descendant of Sherlock Holmes. The English dub of Jo-o Heika No Petit Angie became Sherlock and Me or The Casebook of Charlotte Holmes, with the main character rewritten as the niece of Sherlock Holmes. Tantei Opera Milky Holmes has female characters named after famous detectives, including “Sherlock ‘Sheryl’ Shellinford.”
- Miss Sherlock Holmes: A silent film from 1908 about a young woman named Nell who does some detective work. Probably not very Holmes-related except in the title. But the film is lost, so who knows? Let’s count it since we’ve got such a short list.
- Radio: Meet Miss Sherlock was a 40s radio show about “scatterbrained amateur detective” Jane Sherlock. Another one that’s not super Holmes-related, but at least a couple episodes have survived.
- Online: In response to the lack of female Sherlocks for the past hundred years or so, web series such as Herlock and Baker Street have appeared recently.
- Miscellaneous: There are some one-off TV episodes and side characters you could include on this list, such as MMMystery on the Friendship Express from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic or Madame Vastra from Doctor Who. Putting together that list would take more time than I have tonight, but feel free to add your favorites to the list, as well as any other main character female Sherlocks I may have forgotten or missed. (Please. I’d love to know.)
[Note: There are also many more female Sherlocks if you get into the world of written pastiche and fanfiction, including the graphic novel Honour Among Punks and YA, middle grade, and kids’ book series. But I’ll let someone else make that list, since this post is about having women play Sherlock on film.]
And what do we notice when we look at that list?
(Besides the US and UK having uncharacteristically weak showings.)
With the exception of the newer web series, none of the women to play Sherlock Holmes ever really get to play Sherlock Holmes. They’re always a relative or name-alike or magical cat or whatever. It’s… kind of ridiculous, actually. And it does feel like there’s a missed opportunity here that the next big studio wanting to cash in on the Holmes brand could take if they were willing to put in the effort to do it right.
Or, y’know, they can just have dude!Holmes travel through time again. Whatevs.
Also Enola Holmes!!! she’s his sister but they’re a good book series!
silohouette gem sets - garnet
“when two gems combine, it creates something greater than the sum of their parts, that’s why i’m so great.”
I’d love to stop being who I am so you can be more comfortable with me but I have my self respect and all this weed to smoke. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
There’s other, better sources for this, but this book is still a pretty good picture of how racial relations have stagnated in St. Joseph and Benton Harbor and how white citizens benefit from institutionalized racism.
Unsurprisingly, a lot of the negative reviews are from St. Joe citizens. They claim the book isn’t accurate because the author is from the “big city” (is there a faster way to make yourself sound like a pig shit slinging dim wit?) but Ryan lived there for twenty years and he says it lines up with his experiences. Ryan makes every effort to be pretty woke as a white dude, so I believe him.
I wrote over ten thousand words about my family by marriage yesterday. Most of them, I deleted because they just weren’t what I wanted to put out in the world. I took large dose of Ativan and went to sleep for ten hours, hoping the world would look better today.
Honestly, I’m even more pissed off at the whole situation – not at my sister in law. I hate that I get this reputation for being a mean bitch who hates their family. For five very long years, I held Ryan back. Whenever he wanted to cut contact, I reasoned with him that he should go back one more time and try to work it out. It never worked out, and no matter how many times I calmed Ryan down and sent him back into that den of wolves, he always came out of encounters with them on the brink of tears. His family, even when I wasn’t there, accused me of manipulating him. I guess I was because he wanted to stop speaking to them about four years before I was able to stop beating the dead horse. (The dead horse being hope of their civility.)
Any frustration I vent about my mother in law and most of her family is tame compared to what Ryan says. I’m not poisoning his mind, I’m the person who loves him and who listens to him and lets him be himself. There’s only one of us who has repeatedly wished for his hometown to sink into Lake Michigan with most of his relatives along with it, and hand to god, it’s not me. It’s the guy who was taunted about his weight growing up, who had to live in the basement, who was monitored on the family computer every day without his knowledge, who was told he was “ruining” family pictures with his weight, who met his mother’s new husband three times total before they married, who once lost his glasses and was told he would learn to not lose them if he had to go without, who was put in situations to be abused in multiple ways because his mom dragged him along to hang out with her boss/coke dealer, who was kicked out of his house with all of his belongings for bringing a girl home to meet his family. That’s just the stuff that’s not too private to share, the tiny, visible part of the iceberg. His family abused him for years, and now we’re hearing that he shouldn’t be mad at them anymore because “they’ve changed.” Well, they haven’t changed the way they treat us, so?
I can get along with anybody. My father in law said that I was a weight dragging Ryan down, too mentally ill to ever be a good mother – what would Ryan do if he got a “crazy” kid? I visit with him with no problem because he is polite to my face and, this is the important part, he apologized for what he said to me. I doubt he really meant the apology, but he choked it out and that’s all I care about.
Ryan and his sister had a disagreement last night, and the whole time I was saying, “You can’t say that, you’re really angry and you will regret saying that. Make it nicer. Disagreements aren’t the end of a relationship. You two can work through this.”
I can get along with literally anybody who doesn’t abuse me. In most circles, I’m known as very friendly if a tad bit strange. I would put my most realistic smile on and ask how their jobs/kids/pets are doing if Ryan wanted to be in touch with his family. I don’t know how far this blog is going to spread, so I want them to know: I’m not the problem here, and neither is Ryan. Also if you look around a lot you’re going to see that I’m a raging bisexual, so heads up on that.
snl trying to drag hill for being fake and actually making her way more relatable