PastaPastaPasta

Solid medications (pills) really do be coming in two varieties - edible plastic, and smarties (derogatory)

Spoken like a person who truly knows what it is to have Ailments

They went straight to first base

I AM SCREAMING NOT ONLY DID SPOCK ACCEPT A FUCKING HANDSHAKE FROM A STRANGER, HE DIDN’T LET GO. LIKE FOR REAL THAT WAS THE LONGEST HANDSHAKE UHURA LIKE DAMN YALL CUTE

Who let the mushroom lady escape from Tears of the Kingdom?????

this came to me in a dream

via

[ID: A dark blue and gold lighter with stars and a moon on it. /end ID.]

fireflies lighting up a rural Pennsylvania field at dusk

As a european i sometimes forget furefkied are actually real and not american folklore/cryptids. Like you’ve got friendly little bugs that glow in the dark….. b r uh

in case europeans were worried: we love them very much! even tho they’re clumsy and slow and sometimes bump into you, no one swats fireflies here, or takes them for granted. even grownups sometimes reach out in the summer and gently catch a firefly for a minute before letting it go.

Certain words can change your brain forever and ever so you do have to be very careful about it.

be like the dandelion!! unkillable! joyous!! inherently transsexual in ways others cannot fully understand!

on my redbubble!

Gomez and Morticia Addams got divorced. I woke up mortified and with a sense of inexplicable dread.

"Well, I guess there's only one question left."

Having the hiccups is how it feels to be poisoned in a video game

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listen i know each actor brings their own spice to a role, but i just can’t take timothee chalamet’s wonka seriously 

where is the madness behind his eyes??? the malice??? the complete disregard for the laws of mankind and decency???

this man makes me fear that i’ll be shoved into a taffy machine at the slightest provocation 

as! he! should!

"no kink in public don't walk your partner on a leash where other people might see" and just let him run into the fucking road??????

I love r/autism

I know everybodys talking about the article but its this tweet itself that makes me lose my shit

tinder link in bio.

the replies:

*tapes scissors to my dick* why won’t anyone fuck me, edward scissordick?

I’m sobbing

I love going trough the notes every time bc there’s always someone in the notes insisting we’re all mean and that you can just wear thick dish gloves over your fake nails as if I wouldn’t assume you’re going to Patrick Bateman my ass if you walked into the bedroom with claws and yellow rubber gloves

Sanji is not used to it

I’m not dead, just too lazy to post here. Have a One Piece drawing dump.