melon

I am the final boss. Defeat me and save your world… 

second phase

please look at this picture junji ito drew of his moms crusty white dog

Do y’all think siblings in medieval times would look at the little beasts in illuminated manuscripts and point at each other like ‘ha! ‘Tis thou!’

He loves his corn pillow

CORN BOY CORN BOY

You're a Warlock. But instead of drawing power from a higher being, people can choose to donate a portion of their magical power to you. In exchange, they can scry on your adventures and can send telepathic messages to you, as well as make requests. It can get annoying, but you make it work.

“Alright, we’re about to head into the dungeon. Daz has gone ahead to check for traps, but we’re pretty confident -- hey,  M’stha’venalth the Destroyer, thanks for the three months, really appreciate it -- yeah we’re pretty confident we got the, uh, we got the thing in the bag, shouldn’t take more than a few sessions at best. Who needs a long rest, am I right? Oh, just got a Sending from Gleek, ‘are you gonna need Darkvision again’, nah, comrade, torches all the way. You know we gotta keep it real around here. Plus I love the burning pitch smell. Okay, good vibe emojis only, viewers, we’re going in!”

BOSS MAKES A BOATLOAD I MAKE A SMIDGE

THAT'S WHY I JERK OFF IN THE WALK IN FRIDGE

BOSS IS RICH BUT I'M BROKE AS FUCK

THAT'S WHY I JERK OFF IN MY WORK TRUCK

there is a demon in your house named CARBON MONOXIDE. he enchants your mind with confusion and your body with exhaustion. you need to call a powerful exorcist named HVAC TECHNICIAN

I love Super Sentai so much, but nothing hits you harder that this is a show intended for young children then the monster of the week being an evil robot that steals birthdays

That’s my favorite part, he doesn’t just steal gifts or party stuff, he steals the actual celebration of someone’s birth, like the concept of it

hitting you hitting you hitting you hitting you hi-

SHE THINKS HER LAUGH IS A SONG SO SHE SINGS BACK

@paperstorm

Just an absolute fucking orb of a creature

you people will reblog anything

voiced it <3

not the twitter migrants putting "reblog heavy" in their bios on here... like yeah. that's what we do here

reblog heavy

this is inexplicably my favorite tiktok ever it brings me to tears every time why did he do thatttt

the fuck you brothers

I'm eat shit

And I'm die

wait