Avatar

That's The Badger

@pippinxox

I'm crazy but so is everyone else

So I have read several people complaining that they can't be expected to know the "unwritten rules" of fandom. So here's what I wish people knew:

Fanfiction is fiction.

Fictional people are not real.

Fictional people do not have rights.

Fictional people cannot be abused.

Reading or writing about something does not mean the desire to do or support it in the real world.

If I find art upsetting/triggering/disgusting/outraging/unpleasant/squicky/distressing/offensive, it is on me not to read it, not the creators and hosts to remove it.

Curate your own experience. The back buttons exist for a reason.

If you don't trust yourself to do that, get someone you trust to do it for you.

Fandom is an adult space. Adults create and own and host fandom spaces. If minors want to participate, then the onus is on them and their parents/guardians/trusted adults to ensure they participate appropriately, not on strange adults to stop being adults.

You often don't know the assault status or mental health status or neurotype or race or nationality or religion or gender or sexuality or age of a creator or consumer, and they do not have to disclose to you to justify their fantasy.

AO3 is not a safe space. It is not intended to be a safe space. Proceed accordingly.

Just because you don't like something or find it offensive doesn't mean it is a "problem" that "has to be dealt with".

Most characters in anime are not white.

There is no onus on you to reblog or share anything.

Everyone makes mistakes in fandom and is less than their best self sometimes.

Persistent pseudonyms encourage long term relationships.

Ship wars are stupid.

Someone else enjoying things does not impact on your own enjoyment of other things.

Tagging and warning is a courtesy, not a requirement. Assume any fic might contain untagged content.

Rating is an imprecise art, not a science.

Don't hassle IP creators.

Most people who are in fandom are hoping to make connections based on a shared passion.

Trying to profit from transformative fanworks puts us all at risk.

No one is obligated to share your head canon or fanon.

Being kind rarely fails to pay off.

It is okay to block and remove people who make your experience unpleasant. You don't have to placate them. (Learn from my mistakes).

Britpicking is a good thing.

You don't have to justify why you like a canon/pairing/trope/kink. Sometimes navel gazing is fun, but you don't have an obligation to explain yourself, especially to strangers. I share the overwhelming desire to refute an unfair accusation, but the people accusing you are rarely doing so in good faith, so you're batting a losing wicket.

I'm not your Mum. (Well, okay, a very few of you can call me Mum or Mom, but if you are one of them you already know who you are ❤️)

If you aren't mature enough to take responsibility for your online experiences, you aren't mature enough to be in fandom spaces.

Avatar
dduane

This.

If you're ever asking an autistic person to do something, be sure to explain why you want them to do it.

When I was a kid, I always kept the windows open when it rained. I saw no reason to close them even though my mom kept asking me to. She never gave a reason, so I never listened. She'd say it let the rain in and I'd think "no shit" and continue to keep them open. Eventually, she explained that it could cause mold. That made sense to me, so I started closing the windows. Simple as that.

When we first got cats, they kept jumping onto the counters. Once again, I saw no issue with this. My mom kept chasing them down and I couldn't figure out why. She'd get annoyed whenever I let them stay up there. Once she told me that it was unsanitary, I thought that made sense so I stopped letting them stay on the counter.

To an outsider (and probably to my mom at the time) it may have seemed like I didn't understand the instructions or was being intentionally difficult. But I can't just follow an order without a reason. I must decide for myself if the order makes sense before I follow it, and I need the logic behind it to do that.

So if you're asking an autistic person to do something, explain why it needs to be done. It's very hard for a lot of us to override that part of our brains.

Avatar
bogleech

Not to detract from this being about autism but this is something everyone always should have practiced all the time with everybody. “Because I said so” isn’t a valid reason to listen to anyone; not a parent, not a partner, not a boss or a cop or a whole government.

Avatar
beaft

this morning when i woke up i had sleep paralysis so to pass the time i pretended that i was battling an invisible wizard who had cast an immobilising spell on me, and i focused on this wizard and thought at him "YOU HAVE NO POWER HERE" in a really loud mental voice, and as soon as i did that the paralysis went away like literally immediately

Avatar
beaft

I defeated the wizard

Babies don’t forget there’s an Etsy boycott from April 11-18 to protest the higher service fees recently instated for shop owners despite the fact that the company reported record profits last year. Etsy is usually one of my go-tos but I am absolutely going to stay off for the week. Without its vendors (many of whom are independent artists/creators) Etsy is literally nothing, and if these new policies are undermining their ability to stay on the site without risking their financial stability then they 100% deserve our support. No Etsy this week!!!

maybe just maybe.... never experiencing romantic love isn't a bad thing besties

even if you are someone who wants a romantic relationship, not experiencing one isn't a death sentence. its still perfectly possible to lead a happy and fulfilled life without romantic love so maybe we should stop acting like it isn't.

i keep seeing ppl tagging this as like "but I'm sad" or "fuck you I want a husband" and like... ok? you can want a relationship. but it's not going to fix you, and if you expect someone to come along and make you happy you are Not going to have a good time, and probably gonna hurt your partner/s in the process. romantic love is not a magical gateway to happiness, and there is nothing bad about never experiencing it.

Not experiencing romantic love is neutral at worst, you've just been brainwashed into thinking you need to be in a relationship to be whole and happy. the only person who can actually make your life better and make you happy is yourself.

dear lord in heaven the men you put on this earth to walk around bare chested in the sun are hiding their breasts behind textiles

dear lord not the women too

one of my coworkers tried to advocate for me during her exit interview bc of the 20k pay disparity between me & another person in my year but it sounds like it went really badly & she called me to be like uhhhh so if management retaliates against you just fyi it’s mostly their fault but also kind of mine so i’ll write you a really nice reference letter for your next job

Image

just got an email from management titled “meeting re: pay equity” if this bitch actually got me a raise…

spent literally all day in meetings about this today and management has agreed to enter talks about changing the pay structure after i sent them a unionized pay scale from a similar organization with all salaried employees CC’ed lmao

we had a separate call without management afterwards and told each other our full pay histories and any justifications they had given us when we tried to negotiate past raises and it turns out they’ve been lying to us all about pay ranges for years l m a o, meanwhile the girl who started all this is sitting in on all the calls watching the chaos unfold around her like a righteous blazing angel and i owe her my life

just got offered a 20k raise 😳 talk about your salaries with your coworkers besties

Hello people! These are some humble hobbit illustrations of mine, I hope you’ll like them 🥺✨

{You’d make me very very very happy if you’d take a look at my Instagram @heartsinbloom🌼 thank you!}

the difference between romantic love and platonic love is mostly intent

love lives in the cultivation of it!!! if you want a relationship, any relationship to thrive you have to build it and grow it and nurture it. you have to be honest and respectful and vulnerable and affectionate. there are some things most people only do with romantic partners, but that’s mostly a matter of taste and custom. people have sexual encounters with friends. people have love affairs without ever having sex. people co-habitat with friends. people live in separate dwellings from their spouses. love isn’t a feeling or an instinct. it’s a sustained, mutual effort. ultimately your relationship is what y’all mutually decide it is and what y’all mutually make the effort to create together.

“Why should teenagers make $15 an hour? They don’t need to support a family.”

Okay upper middle class person who has never spoken to a poor person.

Also lol. With this logic, single mothers should be making more than unmarried men with no kids but you never hear those people argue for that.

Shout out to disabled people who don't, can't, or shouldn't drive. You are not a burden, and even if you technically ""could"" drive you are not obligated to if it would be unsafe for you or others

Not being able to drive can be an inconvenience, but it is not a moral or personal failing. If anything, the failing is on behalf of society for not having better and more convenient public transportation for everyone

Louder for those in the back:

The failing is on society for not having better public transportation

Avatar
butchfaith

“why do butches wear rings of keys” why does a king wear a crown. dumbass

the jingle of a butch’s keyring is akin to the clammer of a knight’s sword against his armour

Do any of you wanna see a picture I took of some extremely powerful items

Image

Your fates are sealed

The Elixers