Pi.n.ea-pp-les

fact: ppl named katie with a k are inherently more powerful than those who spell it with a c. the strongest catie could fight the weakest katie and would still be obliterated. however, katies ending in ie are superior to katies ending in y, with k/catis as the most inferior katie. the katie hierarchy is as follows: katie, katy, kati, catie, caty, cati. katherines, however, are the most powerful of all, with catherines at a distant second. if, for god knows what reason, you place an i between the a and the t (see: caitie, kaity), you do not qualify as a true katie, and will not survive past a single round of katie v katie fisticuffs.

it is so strange to me when people tell me they never had an ancient egyptian phase…like, what did you even do during your childhood? 

this is oddly specific?? and over 3000 people relate???

That egyptology book was too golden and shiny to resist

just remembered that Kate McKinnon has the strongest lesbian enegy…when I watched Ghostbusters in cinema all women gasped every single time her character appeared on the screen

Everyone:

@mydaddywasaplanet

i am a tired lesbian

who else here a tired lesbian?? sound off

shhhh we sleepin

sorry, sleep well lesbians

Katie is Tumblr’s #1 actress for the second year in a row 🙌❤️

get a girl who can do both

“So is that a no?”

Spider-Man: The truth is…[takes off mask] I am Spider-Man.

The rest of NYC trying to support their son Peter and his dreams even though they know he’s a dumb kid that doesn’t hide his backpacks very well:

me leaving work on fridays vs me coming back to work on monday

Twelfth Night

Most executives are male, so it’s always sort of their vision of stuff. I’m constantly fighting against that even when I play the wife or the girlfriend or the best friend. I always try my hardest to bring as much layering in and not make things stereotypical, but it’s hard.

I love her more than anything

#cinematic parallels

chillin on a Saturday night

Calm down jojo

you’re right, I am looking a little stiff here, I should try to relax

You call that “chillin”?

Everyone knows the best way to relax is with a good book and a warm drink

I dunno, man,

 sometimes I like just relaxing on my laptop

get on my level boys

Unfortunately to “get on your level” I’d need a boat trip to the Mariana Trench and a pair of cinderblock shoes.

Thats gotta be the sickest burn ive ever read holy fuck

this post appears once every million years

I kept hoping someone else would one up me and I’d have to escalate even further but nobody has.

oh my god, I have only seen this post on screenshots

this is A DREAM COMING TRUE

Bitches

@sparkafterdark

Loses points for not having a relaxation activity included or looking particularly chill, but I think it’s fair to say I’ve been dethroned.

For now.

Marlene McKinnon

Kate McKinnon 

ALL MCKINNONS ARE LESBIANS

ok so the other day i was at sears. I was in the baby section. Im standing there looking at clothes and a lady who works there comes up and is like “oh are you expecting?” And i was like “uhhhh” and because im a dumbass i was like “no i already delivered.” And she was like “How long ago?” And i was just like “two weeks.” And she said “wow! You look great! When i had my first son, i looked like a mess for six months. Is it a boy or a girl?” And i was just awkwardly like “a girl….” And she asked her name and i said Chernobyl and she was like “oh what a cute name! It sounds really familiar.” And i honestly just stood there going through all that and pretending i had a human baby two weeks ago named Chernobyl because i didnt wanna tell this poor lady i was buying baby clothes for my fucking baby opossum

every time i see this text post i forget the ending and every single time it decimates me