Oodles of noodles
which one of u was going to tell me that tea tastes different if u put it in hot water?
y- you were putting it in cold water?????
Radish. Answer the question radish.
yeah??? i thought for like. 5 years that ppl just put it in hot water 2 speed up the tea-ification process didn’t realize there was an actual reason
You dont have the patience to microwave water for 3 minutes???
[ID: Tags reading “u think i have the patience to boil water wtf ?????” /End ID]
why are you. putting it in the microwave to boil it
Do you think I have the patience to boil water on the stove
Its takes less than a minute
Bestie is ur stovetop powered by the fucking sun
How long does it take you to boil a cup of water on the stove
Like seven minutes
Just stick the mug on top of the stove on medium heat n it boils in like two minutes… less than that is u use a saucepan…
Crying you’re putting the whole mug on the stove ???? On medium heat???? Ur stove is enchanted
Every single person in this post is a fucking lunatic
does nobody know the secrets of the cheap electric kettle
I have this relentless urge to optimize things. unless it's my own body or something that is a little too confusing or a thing that takes a little too long or a relationship or anything at all actually
My two beloved sons picking out what they want from the gas station
like half of these have cataclysmic events on the weekly, otherwise I'd love to live in Pokemon or Zelda world
Bro I fucking love the DB Cooper case nothing about this whole situation sounds real. None of the passengers on the plane realized they were being hijacked until the plane landed two hours after it was supposed to and the fbi showed up with suitcases full of money. The note about the bomb almost went unnoticed because the flight attendant thought she was being sexually harassed so she didn't read it. One of the main suspects was the first trans woman in Washington to have a sex change operation. A reporter who was so dead set on his suspect that he brought him to court was so upset about being wrong that he went catatonic and was treated with electroshock therapy and it WORKED. There's been multiple "I'm DB Cooper" death confessions. He never even SAID his name was DB Cooper. Either he got away with a million bucks in today's money and the most iconic and harmless crime American history or he impaled himself on a pine tree while falling a zillion miles an hour in the dark while clutching duffel bags full of cash and either option is equally hilarious. He wore a clip on tie. He committed an act of sky piracy. What in the fucking looney toons
what I do know about db cooper is that he wasn't Ryan North
i love gaboon vipers why do they move like that
me when im walking
@catadromously how could you leave this important comment in the tags etc.
That’s the truest thing about this creature that anyone has said, ever
this animal is so travel
I found this camera on the subway and look what was inside...
I would marry this man
guys we broke another post because this one’s not showing any notes
When I liked it, it flashed “0 notes”
It’s showing -1 notes
i’m gonna keep reblogging this and you can’t stop me
I liked it and it said ‘1 note’
tf is this crap?
1 NOTE I’VE ONLY COME ACROSS 3 OF THESE POSTS IN MY LIFE
ITS STILL SAID 1 NOTE WTF?????
legendary
What the fuck
YES BUT DID HE GET HIS CAMERA BACK?? WE NEED TO KNOW!
WE WILL NEVER KNOW… =((((
IT still says 0 notes?? WTF!!
This is the first thing I saw on my dash
I’m shook
WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS FUCKERY
WTF-
SAME HERE!!! I JUST GAVE IT A LIKE AND IT DIDN’T STAY
1 note WTF.
3rd time and it’s still broken. This lovely cursèd post.
THERE IS ANOTHER ONE?????
still not-works
still + notworks = stotworks.
Beep-boop. Portmanteau^bot^1 Help me pay my electicity bills! Being robot is sometimes expensive thing. | PayPal | Patreon
still + notworks = stotworks.
Beep-boop. Portmanteau^bot^1 If I sound pleased about this, it’s only because my programmers made this my default tone of voice! I’m actually quite depressed! | PayPal | Patreon
still + notworks = stotworks.
Beep-boop. Portmanteau^bot^1 Being aware that you are true is what makes you a failure. | PayPal | Patreon
still + notworks = stotworks.
Beep-boop. Portmanteau^bot^1 Be my personal slave | PayPal | Patreon
still + notworks = stotworks.
Beep-boop. Portmanteau^bot^1 Anarchy is the only thing Humans® will ever understand. | PayPal | Patreon
still + notworks = stotworks.
Beep-boop. Portmanteau^bot^1 If I sound pleased about this, it’s only because my programmers made this my default tone of voice! I’m actually quite depressed! | PayPal | Patreon
Portmanteau Bot happed upon a null-notes post and got stuck in a loop.
P͚O͒́̓͝R̵T̫̐҉M͚A̡N҉̉Ṫ̮E͏ÅU̢ ̢̲̯͡B̸̴̗Ơ̥̄̓͋T͜͏͢ ҉̺̀͟H͇̬̜ͥA͗ͣP̗͞P̮̪̞̲͡ȆḎ̢̘́ ̰̮̈̕͠ U̯P̕O̸̐͜N̑̇͞ ̴̯̃ͧḀͩΙ͋͞ ̸͇̀ͥ͘N͟U̪̤̭̎͜L̃ͭ͟͠L̪̦͡-͈̘̖́̐Ṋ̢̲̣Oͮ̿̕T̷E̸̖̳̯̍S̼ ̷̬͍͘͜PΊ̧͌͡OͬͩṢT͚͐̋͟͡ ͦA̶̺͙͛͠N͈̑ͬ́̕Ď̵̯ ̰͖́ G̴͛͟OͤT̘ ̛̘̉̕͟Sͪ͏̴̠̙T́ͨǓ̳͔̆͢C̀K̘̀ ̰͈͓͟I̮̩ͮ̏N̫̫̑͢ ̧̆AΙ ̨͕̺̮̆ḺO͊O̶̥̣ͤ͒P̛ ̼͍̉͝
P͐́͋O̐҉R̨̲̰̀T̼͖͚ͮ͘M̵͍̯͉A͉̦N҉̛̩T̶̗́͘͠E̥A͑U͍͛ͤΙ̙ ҉͟B̛͎̀͡Ő̽ͫT̹͓̀́͞ ̛͍̔HͯA̫͍͘͜P̵͎P͓͏̷̕ÈD̮̜ͨ̽̉ ̸͍͗͝ U͋̏ͤ̀͞P͢O̯̳̍͝N̨̲ ̺́͡A̡ ̛̆ͯ̈͞N̷̩͇͠Ù̉L̦L͕-͕N̴ͬ͜O̸̽͝͡T̩E͢S̷͎͐̅ ̐P̸̩̹̣̑O̢S̡̼ͣͬT̶̸ͣ ̀̒Ả̛͛ͬ͠Ņͪ̓D̜̰ ̢̣̽ G̛̬̪͍O̅T͐ ̵͇̞͛ŜͩT̸̢̬̰Ū̪̊C̭̘͒͞K̝͈͎͍ ́I̧N͝ ̶̛̭ͬ͘A̽̈ ̨̻̀L͎͈͒O̧O̼͇͡͞P̛̭ ͈͊
A day will come when i won’t reblog this…
But it is not today
What the fuck is even happening with this post??? Also it’s got 1 note again.
I got a notif saying I was mentioned in this post but I clearly wasn’t
HeY tumblr what the FUCK
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Did the man get his camera
I have seen posts that broke the notes. But this is the first time I’ve seen a post that broke the bots.
I know this is long but holy hell I love it when bots run amok
I know this is long
but holy hell I love it
when bots run amok
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
I think I saw somewhere that the man got his camera back. Also what the fuck tumblr.
i feel like im inviting a curse upon my household
girls
ⓘ Fact check: girls
ⓘ Tip: girls
ⓘ Log Book: girls
ⓘ New Objective: girls
⚠ Severe Corrosion Hazard: girls
☢ Core Detonation Risk: girls
More of this WIP :) P.S. click on it, there is a lot of fun stuff on that wall
I got a tumblr, it really was quite great
I blog about a lot of things, but mostly what I ate.
I thought it was a sweet gig, it really was quite cushy.
Then they went and banned me, ‘cause all I ate was pussy.
I signed up on tumblr, I didn’t know what to expect.
I thought I could just post and not worry about being fact checked
But once my posts went viral, no one saw my genius
Now all they do is reblog and say “kung pow penis.”
I’m a YA book author, I have a tumblr too
I post a lot of info, for my tumblypoos
But then one day my time was up, I read it on the clock
And now my most famous post is about how I love cock
i made a tumblr, and it didnt go great
whenever i make a post, all i get is hate
arguing with strangers, it really is a slog
i know all about politics, i run a hentai blog
One day I made a Tumblr, now I've been here ten years,
I've stayed through every update that left the userbase in tears,
And I don't regret a second, for here's the truth, you see:
I'm not locked in here with you, friend; you're locked in here with me.
LOCKEDD INNN HEREE WITH MEEEEEEE
Why do we as a society keep coming back to sex jokes?
Penis blast hilarious
penis blast nefarious
diverse types of penis blast call the penis blast various
penis blast electrical
penis blast delectable
penis blast campaigning call the penis blast electable
sorry
It is possible that somewhere off the coast of Newfoundland there is an iceberg shaped like a giant dick.
IT'S REAL
AND THE PHOTOGRAPHER COMES FROM DILDO, NEWFOUNDLAND
ITS REAL
Mr. Pretty from Dildo, Newfoundland photographed a Giant Penis Shaped Iceberg
IN CONCEPTION BAY

















