tom and jerry have turned to a life of self flagellation and degeneracy.

A boob in the hand is worth two on the chest? A dick in the ass is worth two in the pants? A finger in the pink is worth two in the stink? Fuck man IDK I dk fuuuck

Taking the red hats off of half a dozen gnomes and loading them carefully, tearfully, into a revolver.

Please could you gnomes just hold the fuck still- wait

Where’s the sixth one

runs away as fast as fuckign possible coughing and and hacking and wheezing and crying

128x128 transparent ibuprofen png for when u and the discord server want to take ibuprofen together

dont mind if we do!!!

A peece of pull pork fell out of my sandwich 1 years ago now its rotten in a secret location.Smells like shit and i cant find

My name is not important. What is important is that I really love Pooh's Adventures. I just fuckin' hate this world, and the human worms Poohing on its corpse. My whole life is just Pooh, Peeh, Piglet, Thomas, Thimas, Thimble, Trumbloola, Robert Planch, Albert Clench, Compact Disk. And I always wanted to slosh violently.

What I love about this is seeing that he's clearly a hockey skater. Now, I don't know shit about fuck when it comes to cold slippy antics, but what I notice is different between hockey skaters and nearly all other skaters is that hockey skaters essentially run on the ice. Any other skater is trying to glide, perform, or be otherwise smooth. Create a new type of mobility, but on ice. But hockey skaters? The floor is slippery but that's why they've got knives on their feet, so it's running time. Run run run run.

So this is like playing tag on ice, except the one guy you're trying to get is magically not on ice. And I think that's pretty neat.

He’s also making really good use of the stoppers on the front of his skates. You can clearly see several times that when he starts juking and running he’s not actually running with the wheels in contact with the ground – he’s tipped forward to run on the rubber stoppers, which will give him more traction on the slippery surface. He can change direction faster because none of his kinetic energy is going into countering the inertia of spinning wheels.

I don’t know if the picks on the front of ice skates are used similarly (because ice hockey is not so much of a national pastime in Australia) but I wouldn’t be surprised. But I spent a bit of time with a roller derby team, and I recognised that particular stopper run :)

Hockey skates have a smooth front. Honestly judging by the stopper use and spin jump at the end he probably dabbles in figure skating as well.

interesting fact i have titanium in my spine

Fun Fact!

Titanium not only is crazy durable, but it noo magnet! Thas wy Dock chok jjiun spi; surgyr ad pater noster, qui es in cœlis; sanctificetur nomen tuum: Adveniat regnum tuum; fiat voluntas tua, sicut in cœlo, et in terra. Panem nostrum cotidianum da nobis hodie: Et dimitte nobis debita nostra, sicut et nos dimittimus debitoribus nostris: et ne nos inducas in tentationem: sed libera nos a malo.

dude got hit with the ol’ Lorum Ipsem beam😞

we all have that one friend who’s always relaxing in a large bath while remaining oblivious to the fact that someone is cutting carrots into it

i cant breathe he just kept on fucking talking

i think its kind of cheating when you consider mama and dada to be first words. like thats just baby babbling that we assigned meaning to. first words should be like, lamppost or something

They should add a giant troll that kidnaps you in a sack to Minecraft

the group chat kept making fun of me for eating a "skyrim meal" last night

yes a wheel of cheese was involved. whatever.

yes. here's Two Men Contemplating the Moon, Caspar David Friedrich, ca. 1825-30,

cigarette flavored ice cream

Can you give me some space please.