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you know I couldn't be a cowboy because I'd be stuck with my partner in the dead cold prairie night and our horses would be tied up and we'd be huddlin around a crudely made fire because it was too far to go back to the ranch and he'd play the sweetest song on his harmonica, the kind that you felt in your bones and your heart and that the hymns had nothin on, and then he'd finish and we'd both lean in a little too close and my hand would be on his bandanna and his whiskey-breath would be hot on my lips and I'd realize that maybe it wasn't the touch of a woman i'd been hankerin for

yeah I'll be honest I don't know wtf possessed me here

Piece of crap of a spaceship only went at weenie speed

clearly he doesn't

Wish I could go surfing on a thermal right now

ffxiv is an interesting game because itll literally give you a quest that says 'can you get the meat off this animal' and you're like, yea sure and then its like the most doe-eyed small tiny creature. you are trembling. almost in tears at the sight of the little creature. Kill. final fantasy 14 tells you. Kill and take it's flesh. it echoes in your mind

tubi is an incredible streaming platform you'll go on there and they have like, classic who, and blue velvet, and a fuck ton of silent films, and columbo, and the donnie darko directors cut. And then they also have ants on a plane. Folks they have the hit movie ants on a plane

they have nightbreed. They also have airplane vs volcano, a movie im quite sure just spawned into existence when someone typed the right search criteria into tubi

they have 5 different versions of carnival of souls, for some reason

You guys just find movies huh

i too enjoy niche garbage genuinely. i just think it's funny that two examples of titles i found funny were things people i know online had actually seen

If you want to learn about some of the random offerings that they have on the marvelous free streaming app tubi, I’m on a podcast with my wife and our friend rafiq where we review randomly selected films from the Tubi oeuvre! You can listen here

apparently the eyewear counter at costco really don't like when you ask if they have any frames that are "total cumshot bait"

I impregnated you 🫵

unironically i love this website and the people who post here because like 4% of them are even more pedantic and specialized in their knowledge bases than i am, and they are ALL HATERS. these are my people, sincerely. i support them uncritically even though all of us are REALLY annoying

if you just want your effete dilettante twink to have an emotionally distant servant who brings him tea after fucking him then the term you are looking for is VALET

Every time I see someone take a picture of their fit on campus with their phone leaning against a bench or tree or whatever shit I remember this gif and honestly consider doing exactly this every time I see it

i think all bush is w by the way. george isn’t special

does anyone hve any sin recommendations i just fell from the garden of eden five seconds ago

Sodomy

Sodomy

Sodomy

Weed then sodomy

i cannot recommend wearing fabric of mixed materials enough

do you guys wanna see the most perfectest png of my cat

polite bubby.png

ohhhhhh bubby from orange cats

Hi sorry I saw a transparent jpeg and immediately put your cat in a situation hope that's cool

WHATS HE DOING UP THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Internationally acclaimed band Huntrix makes incredible come-back by publicly executing the Saja Boys.

"We're not really sure how we feel about the public execution part," one fan was quoted saying, "but the SFX were the best I've ever seen at a show, so I'm not really worried."

if you feel your dick tingle it’s me licking it through your boxers I’ve ascended physical form don’t worry about it

can i fuck someone's face or does everybody on this whole planet want me to die a painful death