But…but…but… Muh evil ‘Murica….

BRASIL NÚMERO 1 CAMPEÃO PENTA ☝🏼🥇🏆🇧🇷🇧🇷🇧🇷

This is Not an award show 😂

CAMPEÃO DO MUNDO 🇧🇷🇧🇷🇧🇷☝🏼

I touch the chair and it starts vibrating violently and smack me in the face and I ragdoll to the other side of the room

sesame street tarot

"Stop saying 15 year olds with weird interests are cringe, they're 15" this is true however you should also stop saying adults with weird interests are cringe because who gives a shit

To wit:

I want to share some wisdom from my high school art teacher.

In my AP Art class, there was a girl who was just starting to experiment with mixed media. At this point she was still playing around, trying to decide what direction she wanted to go with her portfolio. So one critique day, she brought in an abstract canvas with some rhinestone highlights and painted and real peacock feathers. She loved sparkles and peacock feathers so she thought she’d try introducing them a *little*. And after everyone had given some input, the teacher gave her his advice, VERY roughly paraphrased here:

“So here’s the thing… I do not like this style. These are just elements that do not speak to me personally, but I see that you like them, and you’re doing interesting things with them.

“My biggest critique is, I only merely *dislike* this piece. I want you to make me HATE it. Go crazy with the things that you like. Don’t hold back trying to make it palatable to people like me. Because I am NEVER going to like it. And if the audience does not like it, it should drive them crazy seeing how much YOU love it.”

Her portfolio was chock full of neon colors and glitter and rhinestones and splashes of peacock feathers and it was a delight. Our teacher despised every piece lol, but she got great marks and I think even won some awards. And more importantly, she was happy and proud of the results. Because she didn’t limit herself by trying to appeal to people who were never going to enjoy what she enjoyed.

Takeaway here: be as cringe as you want. Don’t limit yourself based on other ppl’s tastes. They’re not you, and you are incredible 💕

This Real Estate Agent is a Genius.

I was working with an item today that just utterly flabbergasted a part of me (the other was deeply frustrated with the catalogue record AS SOMEONE APPARENTLY THOUGHT IT WAS PRINTED ON SILK, coming back to that in a minute) … but ANYWAYS … said item is a replica of a medieval manuscript prayer book THAT IS ENTIRELY WOVEN out of grey and black silk … WOVEN … text, images, intricate grey scale, WOVEN … NOT PRINTED …

And it’s flabbergasting because it’s from 1888, Jacquard machine, IT USED PUNCH CARDS to weave these intricate pages … something like 400 weft per near square inch … IT looks like a page of textured paper, but it’s not, it’s entirely SILK … F*CK …

Anyways …

OKS I’ve since calmed down and found out that the reason they used “printed” is because it is essentially printed by a computer … in a weird way; when I import the record, I’m just gonna take that note out …

BUT this is the item btw

WOVEN! WOVEN ON A LOOM using f*ckin’ punch cards!

i feel so bad for nikola tesla like imagine spending years beefing with a guy who has conned the public into believing he's some sort of supergenius when in reality it's his overworked employees developing all of his world-changing inventions and you end up dying broke and starving and alone and then 100 years later another guy cons the public into believing he's some sort of supergenius when in reality it's his overworked employees developing all of his world-changing inventions and he's doing it all IN YOUR NAME. he must be rolling in his grave like a fucking rotisserie chicken

His ghost is setting those cars on fire actually

I hadn’t really considered “the agnostic demigod of electromagnetism is the reason Musk’s companies fail” before, but I like the concept. 

New tech dropping for the No Zonai Device Run

“it’s in god’s hands and I am not praying.”

[ID: A tweet by jazz! @/juhuachai. It reads: "optimal posting times" "stagger your posts" if you see me you see me. it's in gods hands and i am not praying.

The tweet was posted at 7:57 PM on March 2nd 2023 in an unknown timezone. It had 9,615, 238 Quote Tweets, and 36.8K Likes. /End ID]

auntsoka

Peter B Parker and Mayday. Happy Father’s Day!

Bread Instagram is INSANE

HOW ARE YOU HAPPY WITH THIS!!! HOW ARE YOU CELEBRATING. YOUR BREAD IS MISSING ITS BREAD!!!!! YOUR BREAD HAS NO BREAD IN YOUR BREAD!!!!

This guy says it has a “light and airy crumb” YEAH ILL BET!

@smallshrimphell​

Like what kills me is that this is actually pretty impressive. Working with high hydration dough is difficult on it’s own but at 106%!? And to work it just enough to develop the gluten so it doesn’t collapse while also keeping all the gas is hard. Timing the proof would have also been difficult. Looking at that crust they must have a really good oven set up as well. Hot as hell. Probably done in a preheated dutch oven.

And all in service... of this. The texture of the bread must be terrible. No fluffiness to it, all tough, thin strands of bread. Crust is probably lovely, but a crunchy dark crust is only nice when it covers lovely light, fluffy, soft bread. It’s the contrast of those textures that makes it work. I like an open airy crumb as much as the next bread maker but this is ridiculous.

Sometimes, things that are more work to make... are worse

This is none pizza left beef but homemade bread edition

None bread center crust center air

This isn't done for eating. This is done to see if you can do it.

This is the food Famine was serving at the Diner in Good Omens.

this thread is perfect

Great day for fans of the titanic disaster, hubris, irony, rich people putting themselves in unnecessarily dangerous situations, explanations of incompetency that led to disasters, infographics, drama, boat/plane radar tracking, sketchy contracts, poorly-made death traps, time-limits, and comedy

This one was a patreon request, but one that I figured would be much more helpful if posted publicly.