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Supernaturally Good Pastries

@perksofbeingace1

Love is not required to be human. Love is not a requirement. Love is not inherent to relationships or orientation. Love is not the epitome of all human interaction. Love does not determine your worth.

Love is neutral. Love is not universal. Love can be rejected. You don't have to have love if you don't want to.

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Ace Dad Advice

So I just stumbled upon this YouTube channel called Ace Dad Advice, and it is everything I never knew I needed! It’s made by Cody Daigle-Orians, who grew up thinking he was gay and came out as asexual much later in his life - in his 40s I think. His videos include topics like advice on how to come out as ace, dealing with aphobia, negotiating intimacy when you’re asexual, and more.

Honestly, it’s just so great to hear from a older asexual. A lot of allos will say things like “You’re just a late bloomer! You’ll want to have sex with someone eventually.” He’s living proof that you can be a fully confident asexual adult, and a happily married one, too! I feel like asexual people don’t have a lot of older aces to look up to, and this is like having your dad  giving you advice and supporting you. Definitely check it out - whether you’re ace or allo it’s a great resource!

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Seizure First Aid. 

Learn it. Share it. Know it. Use it. 

100% correct medical information on tumblr for once; also consider calling 911 if you don’t know how often the person has seizures and ESPECIALLY if the seizure has lasted 5 minutes or more (which is why the watch is critical)

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ishipphanaf

I have epilepsy so making sure the word is out on how to help people who do have seizures means a lot to me.

As someone who is newly diagnosed with epilepsy I’m spreading the word on this, this is safe and accurate information and it could prevent any serious injuries.

Actually, people are good by nature and you're a fool if you think otherwise.

When you sneeze in public, strangers will say "bless you", even though they don't know you.

When you ask for directions on the street someone will show you the way, even though they have nothing to gain from it.

People squeeze their legs against the chair so you don't have to hop over them on your way to your seat in the theatre, and make funny faces to make babies laugh, and purposefully step on leaves to hear them scrunch, and hold the door open for someone leaving behind them, and ask what floor you're heading to when you enter the elevator, and send others photos of things that reminded them of them, and recommend each other songs, and ask if anyone else wants a coffee because they're getting one, and make videos teaching how to sew a button, and wish on shooting stars, and share fun facts, and listen to others rant about things they don't even understand, and let you cross the street first, and give a bit of their food to others, and laugh at jokes they don't find funny to make you feel good, and listen to kids talk for hours about nonsense, and let you know your keys fell from your pocket, and they may be strangers, but with every little gesture they're saying "I love you, I love you, I love you".

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God, I needed to read this today. Humanity is overwhelmingly full of hope and kindness and it's very easy to forget that these days.

Running up to a stranger at a band competition because they dropped their blanket while crossing the road. Says I love you.

Waiting to check out. Holding a 24 pack of water. Gentleman let me skip ahead of him because he doesn't want me to wait. His cart had a week's worth of groceries. Says I love you.

Cashier paid for my drink because she saw I was wearing my marching band summer uniform (t-shirt and shorts). Said she missed the Saturday competitions that she attended when her kids were in band. Says I love you.

Walking to my car and I saw a couple on the other side of the street. The girl turned to tell me that she liked my pink shoes before laying her head on her partner's shoulder. Says I love you.

Sitting in a circle at 11pm after band camp. Eating straight out of a gallon of ice cream with five others. Laughing. Letting another kid squeeze in and giving him a spoon. Says I love you.

Doing makeup for the one kid in theatre that doesn't know how to use eyeliner. Even tho they need to be onstage in two seconds. Says I love you.

Section leader running to get my water during her break because it hurt for me to stand. She returning to the field late because of it. Says I love you.

Students in line at my job paying for each other's projects. Slipping a few cents when the other is short on change. Putting a few cents in the spare change jar, in case the next person is $.02 short. Putting their scrap construction paper in the freebie box for someone else to use to make art with. Says I love you.

Holding open the door for the delivery person when they've got their hands full of pizza. Says I love you.

Professors putting out a snack bar for their students. Says I love you.

Tagging a friend in a meme. Says I love you.

Showing a stranger the deer across the road. Says I love you.

Telling the restaurant owner that someone left their lights on in the parking lot. Says I love you.

The cashier at the window who recognizes you and spouts your order off before you can even open your mouth. Says I love you.

Kid who tells you that your dress makes you look like a princess. Says I love you.

Cashier that gives you a second piece of food for free because they messed up the first one and can't give it away. Says I love you.

Free little libraries. Says I love you.

People who win a prize and then shares it with the stranger next to them. Says I love you.

Holding the door open for someone walking in the rain. Says I love you.

Let you know that your shoelace is untied. Says I love you.

Putting a plastic bag over an open car window during a large rainstorm. Says I love you.

“One of these days you’re going to wake up and realize you’re beautiful and powerful … That will be the day you stop running after people who don’t see your worth. That will be a really good day.”

Brooke Hampton

My dear lgbt+ kids, 

“Being asexual is okay - you can still have sex to please your partner, so you can still find love!” is a type of positivity that doesn’t make me feel good. It makes me angry. 

That’s such a screwed up focus. Imagine that with any other thing: You have absolutely no interest in going on long hikes? Aw, that’s okay, you can just force yourself to go hiking as a favor to your partner. You’re not totally unlovable, I guess, as long as you do things for your partner you don’t necessarily want to do! 

Being asexual is okay - there are people who feel no sexual attraction, so that’s obviously a real and valid thing to experience. It’s okay to be one of those people. 

The focus (as with any other way to experience attraction!) should be on you. Asexuality is not about the things you can do to find a partner - it’s a label that helps you express your own identity, feelings. Positivity should focus on that: Your feelings are normal, they’re good - all on their own, without this wrong and useless addition of “as long as you still have sex”. Nope. Asexuality is okay. Full stop. 

With all my love, 

Your Tumblr Dad 

P.S: And “All asexual people can have sex” is wrong, anyway. Some can have sex, some want to have sex for various reasons, and that’s fine. It’s their own choice! 

But some asexual people can’t have sex. They would feel so umcomfortable during sex that they would never enthuastically consent to it - and sex without (happily and freely given!) consent isn’t sex at all. And of course there are also asexual people who physically can’t have sex or would feel pain during sex. 

Nobody should ever feel like they have to put themselves into a sexual situation that feels uncomfortable, painful or even traumatizing. 

For the asexual people that need it:

May you find another person to fulfill your desire for human connection, that loves you no matter what, that values you and your love over their sexual gratification, if it has to be another asexual person so be it, may you find another asexual person and be perfect for each other, because you are human and deserve to be loved and respected and not seen as lacking or broken for not being what’s considered natural of human beings, because your existence is proof enough that humans are various in their needs and desires.