bug in your soda can

training by Diannely Antigua

the only reason i'm on my sudoku grind at 2:20am is because i have wants and desires that are driving me insane. to be honest

reading is hard *death by 10000 explosions*

being a vampire rn is really hard bc of the housing crisis like. older vampires do Not get it. if you were turned in France in 1350 I literally do not want to hear about it from you. do you know how hard it is to lure a young lawyer to your home when you have roommates?? and the roommates aren’t your accursed brides for the record. they’re just some dudes. one of them is a middle school teacher.

not to mention some landlords these days will even just straight up use the basement in the place YOU’RE renting for their own storage?? so you can’t even access the basement so you’re not sleeping in soil down there.

my one friend literally pays $1300 a month for a STUDIO and she just has a bunch of soil in a big plastic tub and she has to sleep with her knees all bent up.

and like at least she can lure artists there pretty easily because it’s like very industrial

but idk. and older vampires will be like “a year of your rent costs more than my entire manor and all of its grounds! why don’t you simply buy an estate?”

yeah dude I don’t doubt that you bought your entire manor and the monastic ruins and its cemetery and the haunted woods for €4,000 in fucking 1708!!! DUH!!! Fuck off

I love stories that are love stories but aren’t about romantic love!!!!!!!!! even if they contain romantic love it’s not the focus!!! and love for friends and community and strangers is shown as valuable and worthwhile!!!

will wood and his evil twin won't wouldn't and their neutral triplet might could

if anyone's wondering this one was in the drafts for a solid two months at least

i'm #addicted to saying "which could mean anything" about things that clearly have an extremely specific intended meaning

. which could mean anything

i think makeup can be artistic expression i also think sometimes people are lying about it being about artistic expression and would in fact be a lot happier if they had never been told they had to wear it

dear professor, i will not be completing this is assignment on account of i am thinking about other stuff. Thanks i love you

"Networking is how you get a good job" I am killing myself dawg

Dean Pelton when someone asks if he's gay

Exactly

you know it really isnt immoral, if you do it right, to raise cows and sheep for meat. so. well. i think there should be a story about, vampires who have a town of humans that they keep well-maintained, so long as the humans donate their blood once a month, like vampire blood farm stuff

but instead of antagonistic everyone's like. no he's a nice man you leave the count alone. he keeps us safe and cared for and he just needs a lil snack now and then, it dont hurt anyone. like a cow that loves the farmer and the farmer that loves the cow, even with both knowing one will end up on the other's table. because its like. its like. cows just have such pretty eyes, you know? they love you so much. i think it should be like that

literallyyyyyy

i want to be part of a vampire's herd. and i want him to pet me like a cow