life hack: don’t join tumblr

Water in the air captured at just the right timing to look like Mario jumping. What were the odds.

Don’t you mean water the odds

no

Stop

Why?

!!

OH SHIT!!!!

aahHhhAHHHhhhhAHHhhhHahahHhhahhhhhaahhhHhh!! !

i love how there is no comments on this everyone just gets the reference

No. No, I don’t get the reference. 300 thousand people have reblogged this without a word, without so much as a tag, because apparently we all get the reference. I fucking don’t. This has passed by my dashboard hundreds of fucking times and nobody ever asks what the fuck it is.

I’m officially terming this post a conspiracy. 300000 people could not just know what this is. You’re all reblogging this to fit in, or because you know it messes with people, or because you’re the fucking Matrix. You’re the Matrix, aren’t you? You’re all a bunch of Mr Smiths living in a world of green code. Well fuck you all and fuck your stupid post. I’m off to save fucking Zion.

Fuck this.

Dude it’s from spongebob

I was watching free the nipple, which was a great documentary but I had an argument with my dad and brother while watching it. My dad said there is women who shouldn’t be able to walk around topless. Well isn’t that the same for men? I’m not saying that but it is the same for everyone. Body shamming is a thing and it is for men and women, but it appears that it is mostly for women. Another thing is my brother said that women’s nipples do things. Uh yeah? But our nipples are considered sexual objects because we give substance to babies? Uh what? That doesn’t seem fair. And another thing is think of the children? I see that a lot. Well we could teach our children that a female shirtless isn’t sexual. It is part of nature. Nudity is part of nature. We just decided at one point it was obscene especially for women. We can change that. We can stand together. Male and female and show neither are superior and nudity isn’t obscene 

he sounds like a helicopter 😄

Today’s Gender of the day is: Small Emo Child

I love all 5 of my followers tbh

the gangs all here

How comforting…

“When the text is green” “how am I supposed to know if they’ve read it?!?!” “They’re probably dead!!!” “They forgot me”

WHY ISN'T VIDEO PLAYING?!

Oh, I forgot to press play…

ALL RIGHT LISTEN UP YOU MOTHER FUCKING AMERICANS

THESE HERE ARE CALLED SCOOBYWUFFERS AND THEY ARE THE BEST THING EVER MADE. NEVER HEARD OF THEM? THATS BECAUSE THEY ONLY EXIST IN BRITAIN. THEY COME IN TWO FLAVOURS AND THEY’RE MY FAVOURITE FOOD EVER. SOMETIMES I GO DOWN BY THE HARBOUR AND EAT THEM AFTER A HARD DAY OF LABOUR. THEY COME IN ALL KINDS OF COLOURS AND THERE’S A HOLE IN THE CENTRE OF THEM. BET YOU AMERICANS ARE PRETTY JEALOUS HUH

putting milk in the bowl first is divorce worthy

#or wetting your toothbrush BEFORE putting tooth paste on

wow excuse you maybe I like to soften the bristles first B(

who the fuck doesn’t wet their tooth brush before putting toothpaste on what the fuck

who the fuck does

i the fuck do

what the fuck man

fuck you

This is how civil wars are started

English grammar crash course: “oo” words one goose two geese one tooth two teeth one foot two feet one moose two meese one boob two beeb

We avoid risks in life so we can safely make it to our deaths.